I just realized last week that I have herpes. I'm not entirely surprised by this, even though I've been with my partner for almost three years.
Our relationship began summer 2011. I was looking to sleep with a hot guy and he was no exception. We slept together our very first date and did not use protection. I did a visual inspection and everything appeared to be normal and healthy (and amazing).
I told my friend at work that we had slept together and to my shock she told me he had herpes. I confronted him about it and he told me his ex got herpes after they broke up and blamed it on him. He insisted that he had not had an outbreak to his knowledge and that his blood test was negative. We continued our sexual relationship and it grew into a serious relationship. I was paranoid for the first while; frequent doctor visits to check out an infected hair follicle. Time passed and I began to think we were lucky and didn't have it.
I had my first outbreak that I'm aware of in January. It was very mild, a couple itchy bumps that scabbed and went away. I was in denial about what it was, even though deep down I knew. I've done a lot of research about it over the years so I knew exactly what it would look like.
My partner and I slept with one of my friends back in October/November a couple of times. About a week after my initial apparent OB, she told me she was diagnosed with herpes. She is rather promiscuous, sleeping with new guys almost weekly without protection. So now the puzzle I've been trying to piece together is who got it from whom?
I wonder if she got it and gave it to me, or if we had it this whole time and gave it to her. Or if we had it this whole time and she got it on her own. There's no way of knowing for sure.
I do think in retrospect, that I have had it this whole time and just didn't have any obvious outbreaks. The reason I believe this is because for the past few years I've experienced what I now know is called prodrome. That raw tingly unpleasant feeling in your skin. It happens randomly every few months maybe then just goes away. What's different now is that I've gone off birth control pills after 8 years in January, and had my first apparent outbreak that same month.
My partner is a little surprised too as he doesn't seem to get outbreaks. He does have eczema and dermatitis sometimes which may be why his symptoms are so evasive. Perhaps we've mistaken an outbreak for dermatitis. He also has a very strong immune system and rarely gets sick.
I am hoping to build up my immunity and focus on pinpointing triggers. This OB was significantly worse than January. I have been partying every weekend and compromising my immune system.
As much as this sucks, it has motivated me to make more responsible decisions with my health.