ashley030389

I gave my partner my virginity and he gave me herpes. I don't understand why this happened to me and I ask God every time I start feeling depressed. There's people who have had hundreds of sex partners and nothing ever happened to them! But I did it once and now I have an STD for life. How is that fair?! What man is going to want me now? I'll have to tell every guy I date and probably be judged by them. And my parents!!! If they ever found out they would disown me. I feel like I'm being punished and it's just not fair. What makes it worse is I really fell for this guy and I don't think he cares. So now I have herpes, no man and a broken heart. So what do I do?

Thank you @ihaveittoo

@WCSDancer2010 Has it gotten easier for you? And thank you for responding

I've only had it for a month. I know that it takes time to process, and heal. But when does it get easier? Is there anybody out there that is no longer stuggling with this daily or crying about it all the time?

I've been knowing that I have herpes for about a month now, and honestly, it is not getting easier. I have a few close friends that know I have it. They have been supportive and they talk to me, but they have no idea what I am going through. I told my sisters and a few family members besides my parents. My sisters are also really helpful, but again, they have no idea what I am going through. The guy who gave it to me, we are not together anymore, and we're friends but he doesn't like talking about this. Things between us are so complicated and I wish he would talk to me because he is the only person I know that knows first hand what I am going through and I was hoping that we could be each other's support system. Since that's not really happening, I wonder if there's anybody on here that can talk to me? Maybe give me a little advice? I am dealing with not only having herpes, but trying to figure out what to do with my relationship with the guy who gave it to me, getting on better treatment, going to therapy and deciding whether or not I should tell my parents. Need help, please ?

1. Yes, I know who gave it to me. He didn't know that he had it. Apparently, he hadn't been showing any signs of an outbreak. He told me that he got tested earlier this year, and been with two girls since then. Then he was with me. 2. One time. I lost my virginity to him and now I have herpes. 3. No, we didn't use a condom. We were caught up in the moment and I didn't give him time to put one on. We figured nothing would happen if he just pulled out in time. We never thought about the other consequences of not using protection. 4. Since he didn't know he had it, no he wasn't. We're both on meds now.

Thank you, @whitedaisies.

So I went a pretty good while without having sex. For the longest time I thought I was going to be a virgin forever. I hardly dated, I've met a few guys, but managed to keep my virginity. Then I met a guy at work that I was really into. We were friends at first, then we started acting as more. Well one night he came over, and we had sex. Still friends at the time, but I lost my virginity to him anyway. Couple weeks later, something was wrong with me. I self diagnosed myself, thinking it was a bladder or kidney infection, a yeast infection, I just knew after it wasn't those that it must be an STI and I needed to go get tested. My best friend was encouraging me and telling me that no matter what, I can take meds and it will go away. So I went to the health dept and they got blood samples and urine samples and the doctor came in to check me out. He told me after looking at my area for a couple of seconds that I definitely had herpes and I cried. After that moment everything was a blur. I called the guy I had sex with and told him we needed to talk in person. He thought I was pregnant, but I told him we had herpes. Not only did he not know he had it, he didn't know that it was for the rest of our life. We got into a relationship and decided to help and take care of each other. But things got complicated and we are not together anymore. Dealing with this has been the hardest thing ever in life because I got herpes after losing my virginity to a man that I am in love with now. And it hurts going through this and it hurts not being together. A few of my closest friends know, and a few family members but not my parents. I could never tell them. I'm on meds now, I still have an outbreak due to stress, and everyday it gets harder. Especially because I experience a lot of the side effects with the meds, I get sad all the time now, I am still in love with the guy who I'm still having relations with just not a relationship. I know it gets easier, I just don't know when it will. Any advice would be helpful?

Is suppressive therapy better for preventing herpes outbreaks?