ivoryrain
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Posts posted by ivoryrain
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You're so spot on. I have never talked to a single person who uses protection for oral sex, which is why at least 50% of new genital H cases are caused by HSV1. I had no idea it could be transmitted in that way until it was too late. The stigma mainly has to do with America's view of sex, as Adrial said. People with STDs are seen as "dirty" or "unclean" thanks to the Victorian Era people trying to shame sex for pleasure. Anyone who is sexually active, even taking every single precaution, is STILL at risk for contracting an STD. It's just like you can take evrry precaution to avoid catching q cold - wash your hands, eat and sleep well, take vitamins - and even though you're less likely to catch a cold, you still could certainly catch one. That's how I explain it to people who are doubtful at least, and it usually makes the lightbulb go off and shuts them up lol. It's just an unfortunate part of life.
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Sheepskin has SOME protection against STDs I believe, but not nearly as much as latex or polyurethane. Sheepskin is porous. Personally, I wouldn't trust it.
I'm allergic to latex and get infections super easy. I don't think it's the condoms causing BV because they shouldn't have any bacteria on them. Make sure you two wash your hands really well in case it's bacteria from putting the condoms on. If his penis slips out and touches anywhere near your anus, put on a new one. Most bacterial infections are caused by bacteria transfer from the anus to vagina. Wipe front to back as well. If you're scratching while having an allergic reaction, that could also cause a bacterial infection. An allergic reaction could cause a yeast infection, however, because it upsets the vaginal balance.
I use polyurethane. It can slip a bit, so just be careful with it. You may have to try multiple brands to find one you like. The first one we tried was too tight for my boyfriend and actually caused him a lot of pain after a while. It made me feel like I had a friction burn, too, even though I was plenty wet. I think it was Skyn. LifeStyles are a lot better, but it occasionally starts to slip. Pregnancy isn't a concern for us and we're both H+. We just use them currently while waiting for my chlamydia retest results, so it's not that big of a deal if it starts to slip - he just puts on a new one. I think it may be from the lubrication because they feel like there's a ton on them.
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This absolutely breaks my heart to read. I'm sorry you're dealing with this reaction *hugs*
Just remember that they don't understand what H is and isn't. You can still breastfeed. As far as I know, HIV is the only one that can be passed through breast milk (maybe hepatitis too?). You can have a "normal" pregnancy. The only thing that will be different is that you will have extra monitoring of your symptoms, which will likely just be a visual examination and questions about if you've felt any prodromes/have had any OBs. You can deliver vaginally. The only reason why you may need a C-section is if you have an OB during or too close to your delivery. You may be on antivirals during the last 4 weeks of your pregnancy to reduce the chances of that happening.
@WCSDancer2010 had children after contracting H and did not pass it to them. I'm sure she can shed more light on this for you.
If they are bringing you down too much, even after you explain in detail what H is and isn't (try the handouts) and how much they're hurting you, you may need to cut ties (temporarily or permanently) for your own mental health. You have to do what's best for YOU and your baby. Also, let them know that google is a terrible, terrible thing with lots of inaccuracies and that they should stay away from it unless they use websites such as CDC, NIH, etc. Maybe try just ignoring them when they make comments - do not react whatsoever, don't even look in their direction, act as if you didn't hear it. Eventually they may get the hint that way. If you ignore them, they can't come back with, "But...I read this...," etc.
I really hope that things get better for you!
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Are you sure she was tested for HSV and not HPV? Pap smears are used to identify abnormal cervical cells caused by HPV. It's likely that she's a carrier of HPV without any warts, as up to 80% of people acquire HPV in their lifetime. The body usually is able to take care of it on its own within a few years. Just want to be clear that she wasn't actually tested for HPV instead.
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I had intense itching for maybe a week after I finished my dose. I had mild itching for about another week or so. My OBGYN said that it was likely due to the healing process. Sure enough, once everything healed completely, it went away.
The pain could be nerve pain caused by H, but I haven't heard of it starting in the toe. It's usually closer to the spine, such as hip, lower back, butt, etc. The pain I get in my hip is excruciating as well and gets better with meds.
Suppressive therapy is up to you. I can't tell you what's best for you. Personally, I think if the symptoms are manageable and you aren't dating someone H negative, then episodic is the way to go. Antivirals can be rough on your liver.
Just wanted to note that suppressive therapy will NOT prevent him from shedding. It will make it less likely and reduce OBs, but they cannot 100% prevent either.
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@JessikaRabbit89
I've taken both of those. I'm currently taking Flagyl. They put me on a 2-week course instead of the usual 7-10 days like I've had in the past. Hopefully it will knock it out, but I'm going to have a (worse) yeast infection. I decided to wait to take the Diflucan until a day or two after finishing my antibiotics since they'll just give me a yeast infection anyway. I always feel much better after finishing the medicine and especially after switching back to the pill from NuvaRing, so I don't think these infections are just mild OBs. I suspect that perhaps I have a resistant strain, especially if the medicine wasn't killing everything completely.
I suppose all I can do is ask my doctor in 3 weeks. I can see it causing infections because of irritation, extra discharge/fluid from bursting blisters, and bacteria introduced from scratching/tending to blisters (I try to keep my hands clean and avoid scratching but sometimes it's just too much to resist lol).
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Ever since I switched to NuvaRing, approximately a month or so after losing my virginity (June 2013), I've had frequent, recurring yeast and/or bacterial infections. If I get one, I get the other. I switched back to the pill, which never once caused any infections if it was due to the NuvaRing. Anyway, I was wondering if maybe H makes it more likely from irritation or by weakening my immune system or something? I had a retest for chlamydia today with Urgent Care (got mandated at work and had to cancel with my OBGYN) and the doctor asked if I usually have a little bit of a discharge. I explained that I get infections easily and that I had a yeast infection recently that took two treatments, so perhaps those didn't fully kill it.
Anyway, I was wondering if this could be related to H or if I just likely have a really sensitive vagina lol. I'm more concerned that I may have caused super resistant yeast if I never was fully cured with my very first yeast infection, causing all of these recurring infections. If anyone has any infection prevention tips that'd be appreciated too!
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I didn't get to go because my job mandated me. I have to wait another 3 weeks since my doctor is only at the location closest to me two days/week ugh. I went to urgent care for the retest but decided to just have the blood work done with my regular doctor. Anyway, thanks everyone! I feel much better about it!
@WCSDancer2010
Ohhh, I was confused because when my mom found out she had it, my step dad's doctor was saying he may not have it since his numbers were on the low side. But my mom's doctor was saying any number over 1.1 means you have it. Not that it really matters for me; it would just be nice if it were older and I potentially had more antibodies built up compared to if it's newer.
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@sleepless
That's exactly what mine was like, though my OB was much less severe. I did have a UTI in addition to chlamydia and H, and THEN I started my period a few days after the first sore appeared. Then the antibiotics gave me a yeast infection. I was absolutely miserable once I had all 3 infections and then my period lol. Honestly, the lingering itchiness from the healing and the yeast infection was the most uncomfortable. Most of my sores weren't close enough to my uretha to get urine in them as long as I leaned to the side just a little.
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Congrats!
From what I've read, HSV is only a major concern if you contract it during your pregnancy. You'll likely be put on antivirals suppressively at least during the last 4 weeks of your pregnancy to prevent an OB. If you do have one, you will likely be recommended for C-section. Otherwise, you should be able to have a vaginal delivery. However, since you acquired it within the past year, they may have you on antivirals throughout your entire pregnancy. Your doctor can determine the best course of action.
If you can, keep us updated. I plan on having children within the next several years (4 or so) if all goes according to plan. I'm sure there are other women who would like to know how it goes as well!
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I'm going to get a blood test to see which simplex I have. I'm terrified of needles and have only had blood work done once (and they took 14 vials so I'm quite traumatized lol). Is it just one vial of blood? Approximately how long does it take for the results to come in? What do the number ranges mean (i.e. new infection vs. older infection), if that's even included in my results since we already know I'm positive?
I may be getting a small blister, so I could just have that swabbed if it develops before tomorrow and avoid the needle, right? Which would you recommend? When I had the first blister swabbed, it hurt like hell and got much, much worse - I'm assuming from the trauma and not the OB itself. I'm not sure which is the lesser of two evils lol.
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Look at it this way, 25% of those woken have it too. Personally, I think it's probably higher than that because there are so many people who aren't regularly tested/think they've been tested and are asymptomatic. Anyway, there are plenty of women who won't care, especially if they know all the facts. If I knew all of the facts prior to having H, I probably wouldn't reject a guy as long as we took all of the precautions. Hell, I'd be more likely to get pregnant with typical use of birth control than to contract H :P
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It doesn't matter if a urine test will detect it or not because all of the antivirals used to treat genital H can be used to treat oral H. If you're that concerned about it, just say that you have it orally. Anyway, urine testing is used to detect specific medications (usually amphetamines, such as Adderall and Ritalin, and other commonly abused medications) and drugs. It's not like they can see every single medication you've taken in the past x hours. They may see that you took something else, but it's not going to be so specific that they'll know exactly what it is unless it's one of the drugs they're screening for (which I guarantee it's not lol).
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Hey, there! I'm sorry that you're having a rough time. In my experience, not knowing and waiting was definitely much worse than knowing that I have HSV.
As Dancer said, she may THINK that she was tested but really wasn't. You are only tested if you have symptoms or if you request it specifically.
Assuming that the positive girl was not on antivirals suppressively, then your chances of contracting it were about 4%. If she was, then your chances are about 2%.
As a latex-allergic girl with a super sensitive vagina in general, I can tell you that it sounds like the other girl is having an allergic reaction. Just general itchiness all over or more concentrated around the opening is what I experience when I'm allergic to some type of lubrication or condom. I also possibly have a semen allergy/sensitivity with my boyfriend, and that is more of a burning followed by itching feeling. He is the only one I have experienced that with, so don't be alarmed if you're the only person she has experienced that with. Different men have different semen makeups/concentrations of fluids, so it's not abnormal to be allergic to one man's semen and not another's. If her symptoms are more like a yeast infection, it's probably just an infection caused by a sensitivity. She should still go in right away for a yeast and BV test. These are common infections among women, even non-sexually active women.
Hope that helps!
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I read somewhere that frequent, recurrent UTIs, yeast, and bacterial infections may be a sign of H. Now that I think of it, I had recurrent yeast and bacterial infections every couple of months starting a few months after I became sexually active. I just assumed that it was due to my NuvaRing causing extra discharge (sorry if that's TMI lol) and antibiotics due to getting sick more often when I moved into a dorm. Now I wonder if maybe those recurrent infections were actually my body responding to whenever I was initially infected with H until H finally won and caused my first OB. However, I had also contracted chlamydia, so that may have been a contributor to my recurring infections.
So, lovely ladies of the forum, how did your symptoms start (if you had any prior to the initial OB)? Is what I experienced a common thing?
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After I was diagnosed, my boyfriend obviously had to go get tested. He has never had any symptoms. If it weren't for me having an OB, we probably would have never known we were positive unless a past partner told one of us they had tested positive and we should get checked.
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When my mom found out she had H, she was even more devastated than when I found out I had it. She told me, "You know, I realized something. STDs don't discriminate. It doesn't matter if you've slept with 100 people or if you married the person you lost your virginity to. You can still contract an STD, and that is no reflection on who you are as a person." This really helped me when I was later diagnosed because I was thinking, "Why did this happen to me? I'm not promiscuous." Then her words that STDs don't discriminate came back to me.
Someone WILL want to be with you. Quite frankly, you could've taken every single precaution in the world during sex and STILL contracted H. That's not your fault. You simply didn't know all the facts. I don't think any of us did until it was too late. Had I known, I would have been so much more careful. But there's nothing I can do to change it, so I try to not be so hard on myself. I hope that soon you can do the same.
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My boyfriend's results came back positive, as I suspected they would after being together for a while. I know that it's impossible to tell who gave it to whom, but I just feel so guilty. I'm pretty sure that I gave it to him. He had an abcess from an ingrown hair back in maybe February or March, so they tested him for H to rule it out. He was negative, so they put him on antibiotics and the abcess went away. Unless he has been unfaithful, which I absolutely have no reason to suspect, or he contracted it from his ex and simply didn't have the antibodies yet, I was likely the one who gave it to him. Sometimes I just look at him and think, "I probably gave him an incurable STD. He has to live with this, likely all because of me being too naive to be regularly tested. What a terrible thing that is."
I just don't want to be so hard on myself because if I did give it to him, I obviously had no idea I had this. And as I stated before, I know that it's impossible to tell who gave it to whom, so I know logically that feeling guilty is just a waste of energy. However, I've suffered from severe depression for about 10 years, so me knowing something logically doesn't stop the guilt, shame, or whatever terrible feeling I have about a situation.
Does anyone have any advice or tips or anything to help me feel less guilty? :(
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I found that using a baby wipe/gently washing in the bath and then using a hair dryer to completely dry the area helped a little. I get yeast infections really easy, so I didn't dare use anything else there until I saw my doctor. I had a yeast infection, UTI, and chlamydia during my first OB, so it's hard to say exactly how much itching was from the OB itself. I found that the itching after the blisters healed was much more intense - my OBGYN said that I was still healing, though, and that was likely the cause of the itching after.
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Hey there! I'm sorry you're having a rough time!
I was just diagnosed about a month ago; I'm 19 as well. America still thinks sex in general is taboo, so I wouldn't be too sure about less stigma :P Honestly, anyone who is worth having sex with, won't care. I haven't tested the waters as I am in a committed relationship, but something tells me that at least half of guys who understand the basics of H won't care. Just present the facts with confidence and try to always be positive. I know that the first few weeks are an emotional roller coaster, but putting things into perspective can really help (i.e. it's just a skin condition, many people have it, etc)
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@inka
That's pretty much how I figured I'll handle it.
@WCSDancer2010
I had no idea it was like that until I was hired. I don't know if it's still like that, as administration has been getting rid of those types of people, but I'm sure there are still some lurking. That's why we had to have the whole training on bullying lol. I think some people just work with the developmentally disabled as a way to feel powerful :( But ultimately, bettering my residents' lives outweighs the risk for me. It really is an enjoyable job, e end if some of my coworkers are not enjoyable :P
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@WCSDancer2010
I probably don't have the best immune system, as I carry the narcolepsy haplotype, which happens to be a variation of two genes in the HLA complex that help the immune system distinguish the body's own proteins from proteins made by foreign invaders. I don't know if it just affects my body's recognition of orexin or if it can affect my body's recognition of everything.
Anyway, I'm in a relationship. We both have H, so I use antivirals episodically and don't plan on using them at all if my outbreaks are only a blister or two. Neither of us know which simplex we have, but after being together exclusively for nearly a year, it's probably safe to assume we both have the same simplex. He has never had an outbreak. If he has, it was so mild it went unnoticed.
That brings me to another question. Can we cause each other to have outbreaks? For example if we had sex and then one of us realized we had a blister or something. Or could his semen cause me to have an outbreak, as that is an infected fluid? We really hate using condoms
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Sup guys?
19 year old student at a Big 10 college. Junior rank in political science major a specialization in American government and minor in criminology. I'll graduate next fall or spring and start law school. I want to be a prosecutor, hopefully for the state attorney general's special prosecutions unit eventually.
I work 3 jobs - receptionist, therapeutic program worker for a developmental center, and sales associate. I love my receptionist and TPW jobs. Retail sucks.
I have narcolepsy. Without medication, I can sleep up to 18 hours a day (and still feel exhausted). Please don't make me laugh too much because I have cataplexy - a telltale sign of narcolepsy where strong emotions cause muscle weakness; I may fall down or drop what I'm holding.
Things I like:
Reading
Almost all types of music
Photography
Basketball
Running
Netflix
Cooking
Sleeping
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@inka
I would, but there's a huge thing about not being a snitch. If you snitch about something relatively minor (i.e. anything that doesn't involve physically/sexually abusing residents), you can be set up by coworkers. They can cause a resident to attack you. I don't work with the typical developmentally disabled population - the majority of the residents are dangerous criminals - violent assaults, arson, rape, murder - found incompetent to stand trial. Multiple staff have received tramautic brain injuries, needed reconstructive surgery, etc. from being attacked. It could be very dangerous to report them. I do plan on calling them out as my first step. I'm ashamed that I don't have the courage to report this, but I'd be fearful of being set up, especially because I'm the youngest and smallest staff.
@WCSDancer2010
Pretty much everyone I've disclosed to were full of questions and, needless to say, paranoid that they may be at risk because they were so ignorant about how prevalent H is. I'll likely end up blurting it out sooner or later when I get angry enough about their behavior.
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Do you feel your life was just about perfect?
in General herpes discussion
Posted
At first I felt like it was over dating wise. I've been in a relationship for a year and my boyfriend didn't have any symptoms. I was scared that if he didn't have it, he would leave me even though he said he accepted that he would always have some risk of contracting it from me. He is positive, but I think that I was the one who gave it to him based on who is positive and who isn't, unless his ex gave it to him during our breakup. However, he was negative from a swab culture back in March when he had an abscess from an ingrown hair. That could just mean that he didn't have H in that sore, though. That just leaves two others who I may have got it from - one has not been tested yet and I'm sure as hell not contacting the other.
ANYWAY, I have my days where I wonder what I did that was so wrong in life to deserve to be raped (potentially where it came from) and then contract an incurable STD from either my rapist or the person I had sex with shortly after to prove to myself that I could have "normal sex" again. It just really adds insult to injury to know that I potentially contracted H that way, especially because I know some people will stigmatize me for something that wasn't my fault/assume that I have sex with anyone and everyone.
I never thought my life was perfect, though. In fact, I'm at a much better place now than I was this time last year pre-diagnosis. Needless to say, I was at an extremely bad place after being raped, and I also had a a rough life in general lol. H doesn't usually affect me, so I can say for sure that my life is better right now, even with it.