Koolkat

I think Adrial has it made...become somewhat of a h public figure and boom what an easy discussion to have...some women might know your website already and you even have to have the discussion.

Lol. Have you ever attended some meet-ups for single h people, fit girl?

I felt like the bad feelings were overcome after a little bit of time. Is there a forum where people discuss reasons they do not disclose ? It would be interesting to hear that perspective.

Good insight badjuju. Those lawsuits seem to be pretty rare. I'm actually an attorney myself and it seems the common thread in the lawsuits is the infected woman had an admission from the man. New_Name I'm sort of young... but a seasoned 30 yrs old. The other responses are awfully judgmental considering I'm working out for myself having h. I might be teetering on being the handsome dick slinging non-discloser or the angelic upfront h-man, but that doesn't make me a bad person. I've gone through the depression, thoughts of suicide, feelings of sex being over, just like everyone else, prior to joining this forum. And I felt that way while I was in a relationship. Now that I'm separated from my gf temporarily I'm wondering if the h is keeping me with her or if I really do want her around. In short, I'm just talking and joined the forum to share my thoughts because I didn't want to discuss this with anyone in real life because of the stigma.

That's where I'm stuck is the "90% don't know they have it" statistic. Why don't the remaining 10% just "don't know they have it" too and go on business as usual? Seems much less stressful.

I didn't call it an accomplishment, but it is an activity and a part of life. I'm not interested in reading the female disclosure logs because it's a different ball game for a female to disclose to a male than a male to disclose to a female.

Good points. No one disclosed to me so I figured there would be more support for non-disclosure in general since the h isn't that big of deal after the initial shock. As far as the "drunk girl" I meant that to describe the atmosphere I engage in and where sexual situations are likely, not that I intentionally target drunk women. I am a handsome guy who has always been highly successful with women and I'm really just trying to cope with the idea of all of the pussy that I am going to miss out on if I start walking around telling women I have h. Will check those links but if they're all from the female perspective I won't feel much better.

I'd imagine chicks are apprehensive about giving a blowjob w/o a condom when you start talking about genital herpes? I think I vascillate on disclosure because of the statistics I read and the breakdowns of the risks.

Disclosing must be difficult if you're on vacation somewhere and trying to have sex with that drunk girl after the club. I'd imagine there's many people, male and female not disclosing. I'm not sure I could handle the anxiety of holding that secret anymore.

So good ol fashioned blow jobs have been out of the question? I guess if you're talking to someone then disclosing is easiest, esp if you're going to see them for months on end because if something does happen it won't be as surprising.

But do they treat you different? Do they act fussy and want to give you a blowjob with a condom on and stuff like that?

Interesting, I guess being confident goes a long way? Can you elaborate on what it is you say and how you deliver the message ?

I'm reading there's a 4% chance of transmission if having regular sex for an entire year w/ a condom. If it's transmitted, 90% won't show symptoms. If they are among the 60% with hsv1 they'll have some resistance. On top of that, the h can lay dormant for years. The chances of someone coming to you directly and saying you gave it to them are crazy low. I read one link from Greenville and how he found himself a girlfriend after three dates. I'm on a break from my 5 year relationship and I'm pretty sure that will be my girl (who doesn't have h even though I suddenly got it in the middle of our relationship -- strange) and I'm more interested in cracking open tinder and finding some casual, no strings attached sex. I use condoms religiously (I'm positive I had on a condom when I had contracted this h because I only get sores in the pubic region not on my shaft). I guess I don't understand the pressure of disclosure when no one disclosed to me and I can just fall back in the sea of 90% of people (estimated 45million) who are going about their lives not worrying about it.

Just seems like from what I see online that men are not worried about disclosure too much. This makes sense to me because after doing the research 1/4 women have been exposed already and up to 90% aren't going to show symptoms to find out they have it. Seems like with those odds a man might as well keep quiet. For me I'm just having anxiety over what to say if someone comes back at me and accuses me of giving them h. "I don't have that shit!" I know a lot of this has to be happening, because I checked one of those h dating sites and it was NOT populated considering the 50 million amount of people (but again, 90% of those are walking around stress free).