JDKJD

i know i have dragged this topic through the dirt before but im so scared what i left out in my last discussion is that i just remembered that i did have a sexual experience with my mutual partner in like 7th grade i'm in 9th grade now, he had MANY sexual partners but with me no insertion just touching and rubbing.. i am so scared that i have contracted HSV-2 or HSV-1 i have these NEW symptoms: strong fatigue (tired almost 24/7) extremely itchy blisters resembling bug bites that have started to leak clear fluid and sometimes form scabs skin rash on my stomach crust that is white starts to appear all over my skin at times little blisters on my penis starting to cluster phenomena-like cough i am so scared i might give this to my family members i don't what i would do if that happened i feel like i'm a walking disease bomb i have stopped kissing my nieces and nephews for like 1 month and a half after all these symptoms appeared, i have had 2 severe panic attacks and a mental breakdown while my metal breakdown was happening i started to punch holes in my wall while crying and broke like 3 vases in the house , threw my TV at the door , and broke my bedroom window) since my last post on here i cant stop thinking about this,i am 90% sure i have this. I couldn't believe that i was stupid and this is happening at age 16 to me , this is the only the beginning of my life i feel like i'm going to go back to school this year and infect people i told my mom that if i do get diagnosed with this i want to be home-schooled for the rest of high-school experience im currently prepping my self to being told "yes you are positive for HSV-2 (or 1) BTW there is no cure" i'm so sorry for any grammar mistakes or typos

@2Legit2Quit I know i just didnt know at the time .. But my symptoms are.. Lower back pain Thigh muscles hurting Right arm muscle hurting Coughing Feeling like i have to vomit Sometimes really hot --------------------------------------- But i dont have Fever Swollen lymph nodes (at least that ive checked) Burning while urination Headache

Okay so i ordered the toy and lube off of Amazon... And as soon as it got here i didnt wash it or anything i just used the lube that came w it shipping for both was like 2 days A couple weeks after i started to experience the bug-bite like bumbs that itch After that i started to notice crust on my penis right under the fold of the head and i started to cry After the crust was discovered my penis somtimes became sore and itchy and has some white stuff on it. I considered suicide of 10+ times today and did nothing but cry and cry and cry , My penis it sorta irritated right now and the thing is 1 hr and half ago it wasent, the thing is i camt calm down. This is happening to me at 16 ? All day im thinking "wow isnt my life fantastic" I have no other support besides this forum since my mom is away for a little, and my biggest fear is never finding someone....like ever. And i cant keep myself from thinking "this is my punishment from god" and my suicidal thoughts get worse and worse. My main thought is maybe i have HSV1 and used my spit at one point, and i cant believe myself that im posting this but ive ran clear out of options.

@2Legit2Quit they look like small blisters and sometimes they itch and sometimes they dont, i recently had bug-bite like bumps on me that itched like crazy, and my thigh muscles hurt..and yes you're correct i looked up all my symptoms and...it says its likely i have herpes....i really dont know what to do or think, i geuss i should get tested then?

No...it was a sex toy that someone else might have used, And i just dont know what to think

Im 16 YRS old , male And i believe that i might have HSV1 Genital Herpes :(. I feel likw comitting suicide.... I have EVERY SINGLE SYMPTOM except for burning while urination :`( i am now crying all freakin over my phone, but the only thing is i have never had sex.. But i did realize that i have been using this pleasure toy...and lube...and im soo sooo scared, im thinking "could someomeone really have used this then gave it to me?!!" if i do have this i dont know what ill do, ive been crying for 7 days straight and each night ive cried myself to sleep.. Saying to myself "u'll never have kids" "U'll NEVER be in a relationship" and "Ur just a damaged package"...im so scared as to what i'll do if i get diagnosed ..i really dont know Please excuse any typos , and thank you all for reading this.....