Littlebird81

Noticed a new sore last night...I'm confused as to whether this is still primary, or if it's a new OB...do I need to go back on Valtrex? Ughughugh

@2Legit2Quit @Anna01

*urine retention

Can't really express properly how your responses have helped me. I still have so many questions...but, not so many that I feel I'll crumble under the weight of them. My tail-bone feels broken; that's one thing I've been wondering about. Did either of you experience that with your initial outbreak? I got hit SO hard. It started with terrible painful unrination...I figured I had a UTI. Then, two days later I spiked a fever of 102...was super nauseous, terrible headache and neck pain. Then two days after that I noticed the first lesion. The thought of an STI never even crossed my mind; ironically the day before the burning while peeing, I had my swabs done, and the came back negative--I had no idea that H wasn't tested for, or rather couldn't be tested for unless sores were present. It was such a huge punch to the throat - for lack of a better phrase - and just so devastating. Anyway, for the past 3 days I'm having uridine retention issues, where, try as I might, getting the pee to flow is like trying to squeeze blood from a stone...and then the tailbone pain. No more lesions though, my doc examined me yesterday. I don't know...it's just all so new and overwhelming.

Thanks so much. And the "herpes makes a lot of issues we ignored, come rising to the top" couldn't be more insightful, or accurate. It's forcing me to look at my drinking, my self-worth issues, my conflation of sex & love...my using sex as an ice-breaker, equalizer, temporary mender of emotional ills...it's all suddenly staring me in the face, and forcing me to acknowledge that maybe, in some strange way, this is the univers's way of telling me to slow the fuck down...this isn't working for you...heal yourself.

I am 33 years old. I've recently separated from my husband, and have spent the last couple of months capitalizing on my good looks to try and kill the pain of this huge transition in my life. I met someone on Tinder, and he gave me herpes. It's hard not to look at this like I somehow deserved to acquire this disease. Now, I don't know how to be. Who am I now that I can't use sex as a way to bolster my self-esteem? Now that I can't go into dating situations with the same self-confidence & abandon I once had? I think it's making me realize how much my self-worth is tied up in the attention men paid to me. I went on a date last night...the first one since finding out. It was great, had a wonderful time, but I spent so much time in the bathroom (I'm having an excruciatingly difficult time with urination) that I totally put him off...he thought I was in there doing drugs or something. I don't know...I'm rambling a bit here. I try to be really okay with this, and look at it as kind of a blessing & not a curse...but my sense of self has been radically affected. Who is going to love me now?