FirstTimeFrustrated
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Posts posted by FirstTimeFrustrated
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Not sure if this is the case in your particular situation because everyone is different in many different ways...but, a lot of guys do this to women they actually like/care for. We think by telling you how we feel and putting our secondary brain on the back burner we are showing you our intentions and that we want more than just sex.
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I agree with 2legits last sentence. That's what I'm doing. At the very least I'll meet an opposite gender friend nearby going through the same thing. You can definetly tell most people are on guard on that website though. From the people I've talked to they were surprised I didn't send them a pic of my manhood or didn't have a profile pic where I was shirtless and covered in baby oil
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I had debated joining one. I'm 29 and all my friends are in relationships with their forever person, engaged, or married and having kids. And here I am with H. I've thought joining a site where I didn't have to disclose to the guy would be easy but I still feel awkward. I've done regular dating sites and feel awkward there too haha. Anyways, the point is dating is awkward but it's good you're putting yourself out there. At least the disclosure part will be over. Have you talked to anyone on there? Or just feel awkward in general benign on it?
I was diagnosed a year ago (this coming week actually) and still haven't wanted to fully jump back into the dating scene! But maybe soon! Can't be the only single girl in my group of friends for too long! :)
It is awkward! But I think it's awkward because I feel like a cyber creep rather than H related. Just hard to intrigue someone by a typed word. I have met a couple people and they are pretty awesome, but there are others out there just hunting for a quick one. Guess that's to be expected though.
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I just joined one of those dating websites for people with STDs etc. has anyone else done one of these and have an opinion? Feels very awkward so far.
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Ah, well if your interested.
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Not sure if your male or female but I'd love a pen pal to discuss issues etc.. 29 male here
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@2legit2quit I Ruck marched all the time and did physical training at the very least equal to the army. Just because we have the stigma of chair force doesn't mean we don't have "MOS's" that aren't physical. I did all of that with a guaranteed slot before I left meps and flat feet (insert waiver here). It's historically way easier to enter into the army with any waiver as well. This why you saw tons of large men at meps using hemhroid cream and Saran Wrap or neck tattoos.
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I am. Active Duty Air Force for 10 years
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@lostgirlx if you need any advice just hit me up. If I don't know I can find out. I have 4 friends that are active recruiters currently
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I disclosed. Never felt so low in my life.
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@2Legit2quit has a great point with the doctors note but, I've been in the Air Force 10 years with extremely flat feet. Air Force is one of the harder branches to get into so it's not that big of a deal, just a waiver boat for everything.
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@WCSDancer2010 Dang, because I tried to download the image and it wouldn't let me. Would make for a great tattoo
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@ajw629 your story gives hope to others that are currently waiting to give the same news. Right on bud, good for you and I hope it goes the way you want it!
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As someone who just found out they are in the opposite role as you (had it for at least 3 months and just got had first OB/diagnosed yesterday) and needs to disclose, just be honest. If he's any sort of man and if he loves you as much as you love him it will work itself out. He can get tested and his igG result will tell the story.
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@WCSDancer2010 That's an awesome analogy and an awesome piece of art. Do you know if the image has a title?
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Thanks everyone. I just keep reading everyone's disclosure techniques trying to wrap my head around it all. I am going to disclose this weekend by phone. If she does freak, which I wouldn't blame her I want her to be able to cancel her visit in September. Just sucks. This may sound stupid but after all the research I've done and testimonials I've read I'm not as freaked out as I think I should be.
My father had bad psoriatic arthritis and I would take H over that any day. Hopefully the feelings I have for her are mutual and this works. I just hate having to drop a stressful talk on a woman who's already stressed by finals and work.
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@WCSDancer2010. Positive for HSV2 only. Now I just have to figure out how to tell her and hope she takes it well. She's in the medical field so she will either be accepting/sympathetic or completely grossed out. Nothing like coming out of a bad situation, finding a good one only to turn it into another bad one.
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Looks like I have to explain this and hope she believes my honesty. With such a huh number does that mean I've had it for awhile, thus giving my body time for development of antibodies?
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Test results in. IgG test with HSV 9.25.
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I honestly wouldn't worry. The military is waiver central. I had a guy in basic that had half a foot from birth. He was wavered and had to wear one bright blue shoe he entire time. So if he can join with that, yours shouldn't be an issue. The military just likes to document and waiver everything.
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@WCSDancer2010 Thanks for the good advice WCS. I just got the phone call that my test results are ready, so I guess we will find out later tonight.
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@2Legit2Quit I understand where you are coming from, but the same goes on my end. If indeed it is true and I've had it since my past marriage (or possibly sooner) I just hope I'm not looked at like a liar or manipulator. That I just didn't tell her because I was too selfish.
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@2legit2quit I have no proof that she didn't give it to me (if it is H) but she is the type of person like me that wouldn't lie about that sort of thing. Also she just got out of a 4 year relationship like mine, except my wife had multiple partners during my marriage. That was another reason why I decided to get the blood work done. The only relations I've had besides this girl was my now ex-wife, which ended 4 months ago. If the test comes back positive then I know I got it from her or the possibility that I've had it for awhile and been asymptomatic. I had no other symptoms until I started reading about what the symptoms are, so I could possibly be manifest in them in my head and making them true.
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Hey everyone, first off I wanted to thank everyone for their posts and especially the replies that I've read. This definitely seems like an informative and helpful group. Especially for someone who until recently had no knowledge of this. On to my story/get it off my chest rant.
I recently went through a rough divorce with inifedility/s on the other side. After a long period of trying to work it out I called it quits. While waiting for the divorce to finalize I rekindled a friendship (past love/childhood friend) and once the divorce was final she flew to visit and we started a long distance relationship. Needless to say I felt like the bully at school stole my milk money and on my way home I found a $100 bill. This woman is the real deal and is someone I've wanted a relationship with for a long time.
After she flew home from her visit, roughly 5 days later I noticed a bump down there. I had just had an STD test to include HIV a couple weeks earlier and everything was negative so I wasn't worried, but still called the doctor to check it out.
When I finally got to see the doctor 5 days later the "bump" in question had already started to heal and that's when the doctor dropped the bomb on me that it looks like H. Me being the ignorant fool I am stated that I just got tested and everything was negative. That's when I found out they don't test for H. He did the swab and the test came back negative, but after reading all the unreliable tests here I went and got the blood work drawn today to be sure.
I'm freaking out, not about myself (yet) and the troubles I might have in the future if I'm positive, but how am I supposed to tell this woman that I just started dating and just slept with about my condition? It's going to look like I lied about it and possibly end the relationship. I should find out my results Friday the week before her finals in school. If I'm positive do I wait until after, or tell her in person when she visits in September? I know I'm freaking out about this before I've gotten word but if I put her at risk and changed her life without her knowing I don't know how I'd forgive myself. I do love her, although it hasn't been long enough for me to express that to her and I'm now possibly starting our relationship out with a bombshell during a stressful time for her, long distance. She is someone that I see/saw a long term relationship with and now I feel like I'm going to look like another evil player that passes this type of thing off with no worries.
Thanks for reading. I'd appreciate any advice or if anyone had anything similar happen it would be great to hear their outcome.
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Intimacy
in General herpes discussion
Posted
Glad it worked out @im44
He sounds like a smart, sincere dude.