DarkDay

Hugs. I am in the same boat, but my HSV2 is relatively mild, I have had some issues but no huge obvious outbreaks and so I am CONSTANTLY wondering. And yes, every itch, twinge, tingle, pang . . . they happen throughout each and every day and so my tension is high constantly. The few times I've found the courage to engage in some sort of intimacy with my partner (no intercourse since last summer, he tests negative and I am way too scared of transmission), the next day is always filled with itching, twinges, or other mild potential symptoms. Right now I'm freaking out about constellations of pimples on my chest and neck, certain that my entire body is crawling with the virus, certain that I'm a walking infection. It's exhausting, @DarkDay, and it's terribly depressing and sort of embarrassing, too, because my partner feels I am paranoid. Like you I desperately want to move on. I need to get on suppressive therapy, but I think my doc will pooh-pooh it because I basically have no outward symptoms to suppress. I am sorry that I have no great advice, only sympathy and commiseration. I'll stay tuned in to this thread, hopefully some more experienced folks will have sage advice for us! I'm so sorry you are dealing with this as well. My husband also thinks i am over reacting and need to just let it go. I always tell him, "if your dick was almost eaten away with ulcers,you couldn't pee without agony, you couldn't walk without pain, you would be the same way". He's not concerned in the least and didn't even go get tested himself.He has been asymptomatic for all the time i have known him. Because he is the only man i have been with the doctor said he gave me the hsv1 likely by oral sex at some point. You are right, it's exhausting, depressing and embarrassing. My doctor initially didn't even order me antivirals to have on standby in case i felt another coming on. Two weeks after my ulcers had healed i was having the weirdest sensations of crawling under my skin by my bum. I was itching beyond belief. I raced back in and told him i want medication. i couldn't afford to loose more time off work. He said that was fair and ordered me another week of famciclovir and then after that he wanted me to take in once a day for a month and watch and wait. He didn't think i would have another outbreak as hsv1 usually don't. I on the other hand am not so confident about that. Just hearing how you are feeling makes me feel less alone..so thank you. I hope for the both of us we find some peace soon.

I totally understand how you feel, becati had a bad reaction to herpes and was unable to control it, dye to autoimmune diseases. I had constant paresthesia my first 7 months after diagnosis. The best thing you can do is, start journaling your symptoms daily, locations, sensations and possible triggers like food, sex, stress, alcohol, etc. That was the only way I was able to learn and get comfortable w my body post H. A yr n half later, I still journal, because my symptoms change every few months. It will help you to get comfortable again w your body and feel like you have some control in such a powerless situation. Right now, your infection is very new, so be patient w yourself. It sounds like maybe it may be a good idea to get on suppressive therapy the first yr, since your recurrent was so bad. It takes time to stop obsessing over every little thing. I think k I was done there w a mirror every day for like 4-5 months and then by month 6-, I stopped feeling the need to look as much, as I was learning my symptoms. Be patient w yourself. I too and am a worry wart by nature and am necrotic as fuck.if I can get to this place of peace, so can you. Even when I had back to back obs for five months, after my 1yr anniversary. Did you get very stressed or drink alcohol before that second ob? Was it that time if the month? Are you on birth control? I know liquor was a trigger for me, the first yr or more after I got H, but wine and beer was fine. Hang in there, it won't stay like this. Journalling sounds like a good idea..i will start doing that. Oh the mirror..I'm constantly looking at it with my hand held mirror, taking pictures with my phone so i can check the area out better.asking my husband to take the picture because it's clearer ;)..he now is refusing to take anymore because he thinks i'm too obsessed with it. My second outbreak started (i think) with a small sore inside my labia. Thinking i had nicked myself with the razor I just kinda left it alone and didn't shave for a few days. It started to feel better (husband and i had sex), i shaved again and bam. Within a few days it was full blown. I don't know if the shaving or sex spread things around but it wasn't good. I hurried into the walk in clinic telling the doctor to do something for me. I told him i had this sort of problem three months earlier but tested negative for herpes so i didn't know what this was. He ordered me a yeast medication. He didn't even look at me. I said, "shouldn't you swab me to make sure this isn't something else??" He says, "no, if it's not better in a few days come make an appointment with our female health nurse". I was furious, frustrated and in lots of pain. As soon as i could get into my family doctor I did (which was 2 days later). By then I could barely walk, was peeing and crying out in pain. My vagina had so many ulcers and it was terribly inflammed. He swabbed, ordered antivirals as a precaution and said it looked very much like herpes. He said it is very likely the blood work we did the last outbreak was likely a false negative. During the last six months I have been very stressed with work. I want to quit so bad. I have also been very depressed (had doctor put me on meds now). My diet was horrible. I have been on continuous birth control for years because i have severe endometriosis (which also is constantly on my mind) and I am such a worry wart..I guess I was the proverbial ticking time bomb. I hope you are right and I can get over this obsessing because it's making me more depressed then I already was. I guess I'm having a pity party right now but dammit I didn't deserve this shit! I married a virgin and have only been with one man but I end up at 44yrs old and 21years of marriage with a fuckin std..go figure. ;(

I am pretty newly diagnosed hsv1 genital (around 1month ago) and it has been a whirlwind of emotion for me. I've had two MAJOR outbreaks around three months apart. Each leaving me in excruciating pain, unable to pee without pain, walk without pain..you know the typical shit that comes with herpes. They have been truly traumatizing experiences causing me to loose time off work and barely able to function. Since then I am obsessed with every little sensation I feel on my vagina..bum etc.. I have even been worrying about every little pimple that pops up around my lip,nose, forehead for fear I'm going to have my first outbreak on my face. I just shaved for the first time two days ago and have been worrying about every little sensation down there. I know worrying is the worst for herpes outbreaks but how the heck do I put this shit out of my mind? The doctor has me on suppressive therapy for one month and then he wants to see how i do without it. I've been taking lysine everyday as well. Trying to avoid the foods they say are a no no. Even on suppressive therapy I can't stop thinking about my vagina. My husband has been supportive and tells me to get it out of my mind but the big question is HOW?? This has seriously made my anxiety which prior to diagnosis was already not in check out of control. I'm a worry wart by nature. I've read over and over your second outbreak isn't as bad as your first but mine was waaaaay worse so i worry the third will trump it and that scares the shit out of me. Will I ever stop thinking about my vagina and body as a ticking time bomb? ;(

Thank you for all the wonderful information and advise. A few days after I stopped antiviral medication I started having really extreme itching and then it also moved to around my anus. It felt at times like something was crawling under my skin. I panicked and went back to the doctor in fear another ob was going to occur. He put me on another week of antivirals 3xday and then after that i will take it only once a day for a month. We will reassess it after that. Just being cautious because I can't afford to loose another week of work. Since restarting it the itching/crawling stopped but I still get really random occasional pain during the night. I think an ulcer has started and i look and there is nothing. Hate the uncertainty of herpes. I like to be in control and this I can't. ugh. WCS..we did have a very intimate moment a few days back that did not include actual sex. It was wonderful and very erotic but it was almost torture for me because I couldn't do more. My husband on the other hand left very pleased.lol I was shaking I wanted it so bad so i made him stop..it seriously was on my mind for hours later. It kinda gave me a taste of what i've been missing all this time and man do I miss it. ;) I can't wait until everything feels completely normal. It's gonna be hard to restrain myself and take it slow.lol

I understand you must wait until sores are healed and things feel more normal but how long did it take you? I'm dying to get rid of all this hair. ;) Just curious how long it took you and what your experience was. That being said I know we are all individuals and experience varies. I know an option is to cut the hair down a bit with a shaver but sooner or later it's coming all off. I don't like this at all!

Thanks for the information. He is shocked to say the least. Initially I was so confused when the doctor said it looked like herpes. We didn't want to believe it. It's not even like we practise regular oral sex,but we have done it over the years. So to understand why this would strike now is dumbfounding. He says it won't affect our sex life in the least, that nothing will change other than not having sex during an outbreak. I am happy to hear that. We are both itching to have sex but I'm so scared the outbreak isn't fully over. As far as i can tell the ulcers are healed..but they didn't crust. The labia is still pretty tender if it rubs on my jeans but otherwise wiping, peeing is all good now. How frequent were your outbreaks when you just had the hsv1?

Well, i've been married 21yrs and was diagnosed so you can imagine my shock. Neither my husband or I have had oral herpes sores etc.. So if I understand you correctly there is still a possibility i may have an oral outbreak as well because I have never had one previously.

Thanks for the information. I will go get one of those shavers. I seriously hate all this hair. I just have to wait till it feels a little more normal before i even attempt that at this point. Dr put me on another week of antiviral medication(3xday) just in case another outbreak is coming with the way i'm feeling. He also gave me enough to take it once a day for a month after I'm done that. After that we will reassess how I feel and if it's needed. Still can't stop thinking about everything..hatin life right now. ;(

I recently tested positive for hsv1 genital. The doctor said I got it from oral sex with my husaband. He is the only man I have been with. The thing i find odd is both my husband and I have been asymptomatic until recently when I had outbreak. My question is..why would the hsv1 decide to 'attack' my genitals instead of my face? Isn't the face it's first choice? I mean i have kissed my husband a million times so I would imagine it's on my face. But why no outbreak there and only on my genitals? Will future outbreaks appear on my face too?

Thank you for the help. I'm going into see my doctor today to discuss suppressive therapy. Like I mention it appears the ulcers are gone but it doesn't feel right yet. My labia feel kinda sore but not so much i can't wash or wipe. Just don't want to take any chances of this returning and loosing more time off work. I want so badly to shave but I'm scared shitless to even attempt it. Then I thought I would go wax (never done this before) but I'm so scared that it will rip off the newly healed skin. Will the 'waxer' be able to tell i had an outbreak prior to by the appearance of my skin? I've gotta do something soon because I hate the hair and haven't had it for years. It's not a look I want to go back to.

Hi, I was hoping someone could help me out and answer my questions. I just recently had my 2nd hsv1 outbreak(started around 21/2weeks ago) all over my vagina. It was the most painful thing i have ever experienced. My second outbreak was far worse than the first but the first was pretty brutal too. As far as i can tell (so much hair grown in now) all the ulcers have healed because i really don't have pain when wiping, peeing anymore. I'm just finding the labia has a weird sensation on them so i'm questioning if it's over. Around two days ago I started itching like crazy near my clitoris and inner labia. This itching is also now around my anus. When i'm sitting it feels like something is crawling under my skin. It's driving me nuts! I did go buy an over the counter vaginal yeast pill in the event this was just a yeast infection. It's two days later and it really hasn't helped much. Is it possible to clear a vaginal outbreak and go immediately to another outbreak on my anus or vagina again etc.? I'm kinda freaking out because i have already missed a week of work and can't afford to be off longer. I've started taking l-lysine 500mg 3xday for around three days now, taking a multivitamin too. Should i go fill the standing script the doctor gave me and start it or am I just over reacting? I'm so over all this pain and disruption in my life! I'm trying not to worry as i heard that can cause another outbreak but I can't help it. I took antiviral medication for 10days but maybe it wasn't long enough? Please any info you can give me would be appreciated. Oh and one more question..how do you really know outbreak is over? Are you looking at no more ulcers as the rule?