daisychainlady

@optimist Thank you so much for your response. I think, based on what you said, we will use protection for the first 6 months for all forms of sex, and then hopefully after that we will be ok to carry on as usual. Relieved to know that one of us shedding wont cause an outbreak in the other. I assumed that shedding would be an OB trigger - but if that were the cause, I suppose a couple who both had oral HSV 1 would constantly have coldsores due to either person shedding, and that doesn't seem to be the case? There's so much information to take in. I feel like there's a huge gap in education around herpes - I for one had absolutely NO idea that I could pass anything on if I didn't have a cold sore present (and hadn't had one in 2 years). The select friends I spoke to (while waiting for my partners test results) all have oral HSV1 and assured me it's impossible to pass when you have no symptoms - like me, they are completely unaware.

Hi there, I'm a 32 year old woman who has been in my current relationship for about 2 years. I got my first coldsore at around 25 years old and have had about 4 since - less than 1 a year. My last one was 2 years ago. I had no idea I was able to pass on the virus when I was not showing any symptoms, especially as I haven't had a coldsore in 2 years. I gave my boyfriend oral sex a few weeks ago and a couple of days later he had some blisters. We were both bewildered. He went to the doctor and has been diagnosed with GHSV 1. I feel absolutely terrible that I passed this to him as I had no idea it was even possible. Thankfully, he has been very understanding and the outbreak was not too major. We are now extremely confused about our sex life and the doctor has not been very helpful. Here are my questions: 1. Do we now need to use condoms every time we have sex? My understanding is that because I have HSV 1 orally, I can't get it genitally - but I've heard of cases in which it happens. What's the general consensus? 2. Do we need to be using condoms every time I give him oral sex? 3. If I were to perform oral sex on him with no protection and one of us was shedding (symptom free), would this cause the other to have an outbreak? For example if he was shedding, would it trigger a coldsore in me? And vice versa, if I was shedding, would I trigger a GHSV 1 outbreak in him? 4. What's the argument against him taking Valtrex daily as a preventive? The doctor told us this wasn't necessary - what are everyone else's thoughts? Thank you so much for your time. Any help would be fantastic x