ch2017

Thank you guys for the info and the support. i will let you know when i get the bloodwork back..

Hi guys. im sorry if i posted this in the wrong spot, im really anxious and scared. when i was back in high school, my best friend came to me and said that we had slept with the same girl. he also said that she had given him herpes. it scared me, i hadnt used protection. so i started examining my body very carefully, morning and night. i never saw anything, i thought that if he already knew this information, its bc he had a breakout, right? a few more years passed with no symptoms. it was still on my mind daily... so i went to go see some doctors in my area. i asked for all the blood tests available, i told them all that i thought i had been exposed to herpes. they all kinda seemed to blow me off. they asked if i had ever seen open sores on my manhood and all that kinda stuff. I honestly never once saw a thing. they all said i was fine, not to worry about it, and gave me tons of HIV, ghonorhea, HEP tests, etc. One of them told me that herpes tests werent very conclusive at the time, anyway? well, all my bloodwork came back negative and i felt like i was good. i felt like i had dodged the bullet. im 30 now, and i had a big night of drinking and overindulging two days ago. i mean i really lowered my immune system good for the first time in years. i woke up yesterday with tiny red dots and blotches on all spots of my body, except for my penis. maybe there were some, but it really doesnt seem like it. i had a few small blotches in my pubic region. my face had a few red spots and was very itchy. i wasnt around anything foreign to me, and i dont have any allergies. i dont remember ever itching all over so much, since chickenpox. Today i got the flu like symptoms. i had soreness in the joints on the dominant side of my body, and i had chills all day. But theres not really any fluid or pus in any of these spots. at the most, a very few spots just look like ingrown or infected hairs. something has to be wrong. i have very clean and clear skin. i shower like i have ocd. ive been itching all day long and the itch is always right on one of these red spots. i know i have to go force the blood tests now. :( i just know this bad and its not just i was just growing out of my rebellious, immature phase too. the girl next door that had adored me for years, the one that i overlooked bc im an idiot, has now stolen my heart. thank god she lives in the state i grew up in, and have moved from...we havent met up or made anything official. i called her immediately and told her everything. it killed me but i adore her too, so i would never lie or hold anything from her. now she thinks im “icky.” she had real ocd and washes her hands like every ten minutes, so i know its over. she’ll be my friend and i think she’ll continue to be here for me, but i know im going to have to watch her fall in love with another man now :”( ive never felt so sad. she was gonna save me and make me a really good man. God this is so awful. I have so many questions. What are the tests i need to request? can they swab and do cultures if no sores seem open and oozing? what if everything is gone before i can get to the doc? if i ever find someone in the herpes community, are we just going to make each other's viruses worse? will we just ping pong the outbreaks off of each other like ive read on other websites? i just know something is wrong. i keep myself very fit, and the bumps and stuff seem to be fading quickly. but these are a different kind of red. they seem to look like they are on fire. are my symptoms likey to spread and get worse? ive seen the term “non genital hsv2..” could that be what i have if it seems like a full body rash? ive been researching endlessly and everything is so unclear. it sounds like these viruses can mutate into whatever the hell they want, and attack any part of our bodies any way they want. Anyway, thank you for reading and i hope i didnt sound too ridiculous. id love to hear from some nice people.