Cemc005

Hello everyone. I figured I would give everyone an update to this post So I decided to take the risk and stay with him and it was probably the best decision I have made in quite some time. I have no doubt in my mind that I have a very long future with this individual (when you know, you know) and I cant begin to describe how happy I am. He is, hands down, one of the most amazing men I have ever dated. He switched to Valacyclovir, as one of its indications for use is the reduction of transmission to an uninfected partner and is taking lysine pills as well. I also started taking vitamins with immune support to help on my end. We finally had sex in the beginning of January, and, the first time was a disaster. The condom broke so there was an abundance of concerns as there was skin to skin contact and contact with fluids. As you can imagine, it was a highly emotional evening. We did find some humor in the situation though because we did everything on our end to help prevent transmission and the condom broke, completely, and totally, out of our hands, so we did laugh a little. Needless to say, that entire box of condoms was disposed of. So far, I don't have any symptoms but it also hasn't been very long so symptoms could potentially pop up. We have had sex since and its been incredibly passionate and very satisfying for the both of us. I will say that I do think that having such intense and emotional conversations about sex and herpes so early on in a relationship did actually bring us together and waiting to have sex forced us to explore each other on an emotional and intellectual level. That alone created such a bond and attraction between the two of us. I am, of course, still nervous about contracting HSV2 but I do know that, especially with him by my side, I can tackle the issue. Im not really concerned with becoming seropositive, but more so concerned with the primary outbreak and if it would interfere with my day to day responsibilities, such as school (I've read some horror stories). I am HSV1 positive but have never had a cold sore so I am not sure if my immune system would suppress HSV2 also. Fortunately, the daily constant fear that appeared at the beginning of our relationship, has ceased and its not something I think about much. Either way, I am looking forward to a very long and healthy relationship with this man. I keep asking myself, how on earth I got so lucky to find him. I have never laughed as hard nor smiled as much as I do when I am with him. I only hope that everyone else can find a relationship like this.

Hey all, new here, hoping to get some real advice/questions answered from those of you with experience. I am a 30 year old female who recently started dating a 31 year old HSV1 & HSV2+ male (10 years). He told me pretty early on about his diagnosis, which, came as quite the surprise as I had never had this conversation with anyone before. I know he was nervous as his honesty came out of nowhere in the middle of a conversation. Both of us are actually in medical school, and as such, I am an extreme critical thinker and problem solver which has led to some pretty severe inner turmoil about this relationship. I am head over heels for this individual and I don't think I would hesitate at all if it wasn't for his diagnosis. Because I am in medicine, I know that this is just a virus, and there are tons of different strains of herpes viruses that affect many different types of mammals presenting with a wide variety of symptoms. But my main concern is knowingly and willingly putting my health at risk for another person. I am not immunocompromised in any manner but I do have a pretty poor immune system, always getting colds, tons of allergies, and I am incredibly terrified of contracting HSV2 and having serious debilitating outbreaks that could interfere with my education and career. We have yet to have sex and talked extensively about this. He has been very open and understanding if I chose to end things. I have done an incredible amount of research in medical journals and googling, have spoken with my primary care physician and an STD specialist, and had a full STD panel (negative for everything except HSV1, which I have known for years). He also has an appointment with his doctor for a full STD panel and to switch from acyclovir to valtrex as suggested by the STD Specialist as Valtrex is now also labeled for the reduction of transmission to an unaffected partner, is waiting for his Lysine to arrive from Amazon, and, if we do decide to have sex, fully intend to use condoms. I know that the use of daily anti-virals, homeopathic remedies, condom use, and abstinence from sexual intercourse during outbreaks and prodromes is the best way to reduce transmission to an unaffected partner and that there is absolutely no way to eliminate that risk. I also know that is is very likely that I have already slept with an unknowing infected individual. The STD specialist even said to me multiple times this really is not a big deal at all and the only reason its stigmatized in America is because we don't like to talk about sex, which is a valid point. Im concerned that I could contract this disease, despite being careful and I'm looking for thoughts, support, advice opinions, or, perhaps additional medical papers with facts and figures. I haven't really been able to talk to anyone about this because my close friends are all colleagues in the same school and I would never share something private like this so I've been kind of feeling really alone in this decision. I do talk to him about it but I always feel guilty because I feel like I make him feel shameful, which he shouldn't. I go through waves of acceptance, when I look at him, I know exactly why Im considering this and then moments, where I am alone, wondering why am I putting my health at risk? So, I respectfully ask for your guidance. Thank you