Bluemoon

I got diagnosed with HSV-2 2 months ago. I had just started to date someone before I found out and things were going really well, then I got my first symptoms (full on) and it was a real shock to me. I found out the previous person I was dating had HSV2 for 17 years, he never thought to let me know, he said he didn't think he was contagious has he had no symptoms after the first time and went on to have a few partners with no incidents after that. I only slept with this guy twice. That's my luck! When I found out I had symptoms, I told my new partner strait away as I was very worried I would have gave it to him. Unfortunately I did. He took it very well at first, but only had very mild symptoms. I was relieved has I didn't want my relationship to be over... Sadly a few weeks ago he had another show but this time a lot more severe which put him in a bad place mentally. Then he stopped messaging me. He ended up telling me he had mixed emotions and couldn't continue with our relationship. I am gutted and feel very alone. I live in Ireland, it's like living in a grotto, people don't talk about things like that, a lot of narrow minds here. Going on a dating site to try find people like me are non existent. I feel like I will never find someone who will accept me now with this condition. People will just run away as soon as I'll disclose. And I wouldn't blame them. I feel like my love life is over, I just want to cry everyday, I'm loosing my confidence and its bringing me down.

I'm no expert as I am new as well with this but like you I started seeing someone and was tested hsv2 positive after a swab on lesions which appeared about 10 days after being with this person. I had no doubt in my mind my new bf gave it to me. My previous relationship lasted 4 years and it seemed more logical to me that the new guy was the carrier as i have never experience anything before. my first outbreak was pretty intense and lasted 3 weeks. I confronted the new guy as soon as i got diagnosed and found out he has had hsv2 for 17 years now and didn't know he could still be contagious as he never had symptoms since his first outbreak and never had problems with past relationship. He told me at the time he was misinformed by his doctor and didn't know he could still give it to a partner so many years later. I hope this help, don't be afraid to let him know, he could well be the carrier.

I agree with johnd, how do you get back to normal when every time you meet someone for a potential relationship you fear the person running the opposite direction.. It makes me feel sad and depressed. I feel like I have this black stain on me and it will never go away. I question the 4% myself as the person who gave me herpes had it for 17 years with no symptoms, or maybe I just was the unlucky person to catch it after 2 nights being with him (unprotected sex). It just shows, you can still be contagious so many years later with no symptoms what all.