HSV1 December 2012 to now...where I'm at.

[jkjohn08]

I found out I had HSV1 last December around Christams time. I was devastated, paralyzed with fear..I didn't have any background knowledge on it.

After the shock wore off...the reading and questions began. I researched everything I could and after finding answers I began to except what happined. BUT.....I do not think I will ever have the guts to tell anyone (meaning a guy I want to sleep with) in fear or rejection/someone telling others. I just do not have it in me.

 

I thought about my options:

A.Don't tell, continue with my sex life & hope for the best/deal with whatever comes

Or

B. Go back to my ex because he knows, because I told him. I'm sure I got it from him.

He & I love eachother, but I found out that he was planning on sleeping with someone else. It never happined bevause I caught him but the fact is, he was going to (he says he wasn't rly going to, was just depressed).

 

I've been single for 2 monthes & was asked out by a great guy. I keep telling myself to not go....bc I know I'm not going to be able to tell him. Most of me wants to go back to my ex, because he knows and it's just easier never to have to tell someone again.

 

Most ppl only know what they hear, jokes, hurtful slang, movie lines, pictures from the Internet. I just can't bring myself to agree to be honest with a new person. So....I feel like I will be along forever. Or ...with my ex.

 

I feel ok/decent about myself now & know how to handle it when it occurres. It just the telling part I can't do.

I never want to be that girl...the joke.

 

 

[Optimist13]

Hey, I hear what you're saying but I disagree with your options. You are completely forgetting option C which is learn to love yourself and be happy with yourself and you will meet the right guy who you can trust and tell. I know how you are feeling but at the end of the day we are talking about a cold sore here! THATS IT!! A cold sore that happens to be in a private area.

 

Just go out with this great guy enjoy it you are entitled to it don't let this stupid virus stop you from living and loving and having fun! I have disclosed to 1 guy (now my ex) he was fine with it and still is fine with it. He says it was worth it to spend an amazing 9 months together but things don't always work out. But that was nothing to do with HSV.

 

I am now in a similar situation to you, really nice guy been seeing him quite a bit we talk lots and get on really well. But right now I don't feel like I can disclose to him. But what I am NOT going to do is stop seeing him altogether, I am going to keep on seeing him. If and when the time comes that I feel comfortable enough to sleep with him, then that has to be the time I trust him enough to disclose. It just means that I am more respectful to myself and my body by waiting and getting to know him. I am really very nervous about telling him in fact it is hanging over me each time I see him but I am not ready to tell him yet. I will just have to enjoy his company cuddles and kisses until it feels right :-)

 

I know most people only know what they hear about hsv, I know that's how I felt until I researched it, that is why I think it is important to read up on what you should say to someone when disclosing. I know there is so much info on this forum that can help you put it in a way that doesn't sound so horrific!

 

Good luck and keep me updated :-)