Any change regarding your health will be an adjustment regardless of how serious the condition is. In this case, herpes really isn't a big deal if you can come to terms with it mentally. That's the toughest part and it all depends on the person. Well to your questions...
Your feelings are normal, but it doesn't mean you are gross or disgusting. You're not stupid nor should you feel guilty for wanting to have sex. It seems like the more pressing issue is that your bf wasn't supportive when you needed him to be, but that's more of a relationship thing opposed to an hsv issue. The good news is it's not going to make the issue any worse if you choose to be intimate with him.
With anything, the longer you have something or the more often you do something the more normal it becomes. So yes, life does get better and the quicker you deal with things mentally the quicker you'll be "normal again".
As far as taking a pill daily, many people feel the same way you do. Typically, taking a pill daily is only if you're trying to decrease the frequency and severity of future symptoms. If they are generally mild it may not be necessary. The other reason is if you want to take extra precaution in protecting a partner (if your BF has it, this is moot). While there are no guarantees, studies regarding HSV are being conducted for better treatments. Specifically there is one ending a phase 2 clinical trial in July that is targeting to produce a herpes vaccine (to eliminate the need to take a daily pill). Vical is the company.
Thanks so much for your reassurance. It’s so difficult but I’m in a good place at the moment just hope it lasts.