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  1. Thats all fine and good, but where does that leave us folks with type 2 who do still get symptoms even 4 years later. God forbid I cut myself shaving. I can still pass it, its still a conversation. I'm not saying I'm letting the stigma get to me, but it still has to be a talk. Even when I haven't made a huge deal out of it, it still becomes a big deal to the other person.
  2. The guy and i still talk on a daily basis and are pretty good friends. I asked him how much Herpes had to do with breaking it off with me and kind of dodged the question and said that he had some personal issues he needs to work on and that he's sorry for leading me on but that he "admires me for my strengths and honesty." blah blah blah. When it comes to what all the guys who rejected me have in common, there really isn't anything. I mean, I'm a white girl and they were all hispanic but that literally has nothing to do with it. I've been rejected by jocks, tech guys, college grads and peopl
  3. Thank you both for your comments. I've calmed down a bit, but still not feeling my best. The guy texted me today, asking me how I was and talking to me like a friend. I appreciate that, since he's not treating me any different and isn't trying to do the slow fade out which is a nice change. I'm so glad other people don't identify the "herpes as a litmus" test narrative. It has almost never been a way to become more emotionally intimate with someone and usually if they are accepting they will be accepting even if it doesn't come out the way you intend. People who aren't okay with it, won't
  4. So its been a while since I've been here. The last time I was here I posted about how I put my status in my profiles and then someone screenshot it and posted it all over the internet. I took my response videos down because I had been looking for a job and didn't want them to be found. This next guy I've known for about 6 months. we texted daily and only recently started hanging out. I thought he liked me for me and seemed like a standup dude. In the heat of the moment I didn't anticipate things going as far physically as they did so I had to stop him and kind of blurted out I had herpes. I
  5. Yeah, today was different. He wasn't like he was on the date but I still didn't feel like he was right for me. Oh well, at least I got help moving my stuff. HAHAH
  6. Thank you. I'm gonna give it another date maybe just to make sure. I'm also moving apartments today and had asked for help so I know I gotta check it out a bit longer. I haven't been around him long enough for him to be the "my way or the highway" type, but it wouldn't surprise me. The whole thing is just strange to me!!
  7. I ask myself the last question a lot and thats what I am trying to figure out with this guy. I don't know if the things that are bugging me are for real or not. Like we went to a wine bar and he was super pretentious about how to taste wines. Hes probably just trying to impress me, but it just bugged me a bit. I think the part the bugs me may be the need to fix me. It may be a talk I need to have with him. I don't want to be fixed or for him to guide me. I don't need him to tell me how much he knows about relationships and how to be a good dude- just be a good dude. Also, he spent the n
  8. So I met this guy back in march when I went to Vegas and we were talking ever since. Seemed to be a nice guy, into me, and all that. He just graduated and is a Dentist. Keep in mind I have not had many great relationships so my patterns aren't the best. It can be hard to determine whether or not I'm with someone who is wrong for me vs me being a commitment-phobe. I told him I had herpes and he interrupted me and told me he was fine with it and launched into the "I accept you, you're not damaged goods, you're worthy of love" and all that. You would think that would make me feel fantastic bu
  9. @2letit2quit It's not that I don't see the validity in waiting. I get why people wait awhile before disclosing. I guess I've never been in a situation that supported waiting a long time. One of the situations the guy was trying to sleep with me and I knew I HAD to say something about it. He said he would think about it and then never contacted me again. That sucked but he was never going to be worth being vulnerable for it seems Same with this other guy. We were having the "when was your last relationship," type of talks, had been talking for a couple weeks. i could have waited a bit lo
  10. @2legit2quit I usually will disclose either when things start to get hot and heavy, or when I think things are heading in the relationship direction. I usually disclose on my dating sites but there were sites where it wasn't conducive to that. Both instances were within a week or two. I've only had 2 instances where I had a sit down disclosure, other times were on sites where the guys knew ahead of time, and the others were casual sex things. I know where people are coming from when they say to hold off and let them get to know you first, but I also tend to do it for my protection because
  11. I tried to do that with my roomie/ friend. I messaged here essentially what I wrote up there. How I just want someone to feel that with me for a bit and know where I am coming from, to just acknowledge that it sucks. Her answer was "We've all been through unfortunate stuff and the world would be a miserable place if we all carried around each other's pain." I tried to explain it further about how I didn't want advice or anything and she finally agreed. But yeah, its the fear of "I don't know what to say," and other similar things. I do try and accept it but it makes it so uncomfortable. Wh
  12. I haven't yet. I still get nervous about it. It can be difficult to share things even with those I care about. I usually just don't say anything. I share stuff that I've been through, but again, getting sympathy can be really strange and I don't know what to do. Getting sympathy is preferable to having someone try and fix my situation, but its part of what makes talking uncomfortable.
  13. I'm not a fan of talking about how much it sucks to disclose and have it fail. To be honest, I have much better luck disclosing for casual sex than I do for relationships. Now, before someone posts the "Herpes as a relationship filter," video, I should say outright that I am not a fan of hopeful talk. It bothers me and actually ends up doing the opposite. I have heard the "someday," talk for as long as I can remember and each time I can remember getting pissed off and irritated. I end up feeling like they say it because they don't know what else to say. That is why I hate talking to people
  14. Hey all, I filmed another video about exactly why I disclose herpes publicly. Maybe this will be where I post updates and new videos. I realize this could be super helpful for newly diagnosed peoples well as those of us still struggling sometimes! Feel free to watch, share, and comment! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwBzw_ZZ_Qo
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