HowCanThisBe

Thank you WCSDancer2010 for your words of advice and direction. I am trying to digest everything, not panic, share with my partner so he is aware and figure out what's next. First and foremost I need to get past this horrendous OB. I am so pleased to have found this site and am trying to take in as much as I can. (I apologize also for the duplicate post ~ not sure how that happened).

Thank you so much for your words. Right now it just feels like so many unknowns and that I am overwhelmed on so many levels. I cannot believe the pain that goes with this!!!! A blood test is obviously going to be the way for both of us to know for sure. I am a mature woman who never in a million years would have thought this would happen to me but that just goes to show. The more I read the more I'm seeing that for those of us over 45 it is becoming more and more common ~ probably because we thought we had been monogamous for so many years and that it 'won't happen to me'. Big wake up call. Thank you again!

I have been trying to figure out just how I did get it. I know I'm probably driving myself crazy but I need to try and understand more to help my partner. My husband of 11 years died 4 years ago and I had no sexual contact until recently. The person with whom I was intimate is a friend of many years and I know his sexual history which was that he, until me was monogamous. I have told him now what is happening and he, like myself is absolutely floored. He's never shown any symptoms at all nor has his partner in his monogamous relationship. Yes, I feel like it's my karma that this has happened and that just makes it harder. My question is this. Could I have someone contacted this from my husband (he had shingles about 5 yrs ago but absolutely no other symptoms) and it lay dormant all this time only to be 'awakened' when I now have a sexual encounter? Seems so far fetched to me but I have to try and determine just how this may have happened. The man with whom I was intimate is supportive but mystified. I'm hurting so bad both emotionally and physically right now and trying to put pieces together. I've gone through so many of the discussion threads but haven't seen anything to address question like this. Can anyone help me re timelines and information in general?

I am newly diagnosed and so many questions. I'm over 50 and would love to have someone to talk to (if this thread is still active). Ideally it would be great to have both a male and female buddy in order to get both perspectives. I honestly never thought this would happen to me and feel both alone and quite honestly ignorant right now. I'm in Canada. Thank you