ScreamImOkay

21, female. I'm from nebraska but I could talk to anyone from anywhere. I don't really know anyone else who has herpes other than me and my ex. I have both genital and oral hsv1. Feel free to message me... anyone.

Haha sorry I'm a moron.

Well they're gone already but I don't think it was. It didn't look like the rest of the bumps I've gotten. And it cleared up before my actual ob did so that means something right?

We're working on getting educated about it. I've been doing a lot of research. It is ghsv1. He has oral hsv1. He just simply didn't know enough about it and how can I be mad at him if he just didn't know? Also, isn't everyone mad at herpes? I'm taking antivirals now and I hate taking medication. I think him not wanting to talk about it is just his way of dealing with it. We eventually talked about everything.I know the bad stigma about it, and it's honestly our own fault because we were both so uninformed. It is changing who I am but not in a bad way.

It was a day just like any other. I woke up running late for work, slipped out of bed and hopped in the shower. The shower was normal, until I got around to washing my body. I typically don't pay much attention, just kind of wash myself ya know? Well that day, I found a bump. Just one bump, thought maybe it was an ingrown hair so I studied it a little bit and got out of the shower. A little confused, I brushed it off and continued about my day. Later on that day I went to the restroom and had a pain so bad I almost fell right off the toilet. It only happened when I went to the restroom, but that and the bump were more than enough to warrant a trip to planned parenthood. I didn't have an appointment, so I had to wait in the stupid waiting room for an hour and half before I could be seen. My sons father texting me, asking when I thought I'd be home. I didn't tell him where I was going. If it was nothing, why would I worry about anything? I grabbed a magazine, I never read magazines in waiting rooms. I read one and there was a rather long article about my birth control, nexplanon. I was chalking all my symptoms up to it, ready to tell the doctor I wanted the damn thing removed. Finally the nurse called me back, she was odd and looked more upset that I wasn't already taking some sort of calcium vitamin than the fact I was there to get tested for an std. After already being there two months before for the same reason. I explain my symptoms, the doc comes in and I explain my symptoms again. She leaves, I get undressed and wait for her to come back. I could hear this woman laughing in the hallway. Not at me I think, just at some joke she told. I could hear her right outside my door laughing and acting unbelievably unprofessional. I'm not sure why that aspect bothered me so much. Although, now that I think about it I'm sure I was just bitter about the entire situation. Anyhow, she comes in and is still giggling, asks me to lay down and scoot forward. She's still talking to the nurse about whatever was going on in the hallway. Then the laughing stops, she stops being silly and looks 100% serious. She asked me a few things like if I'd had any new partners since the last time I came in. I answered honestly, I never felt a need to lie to someone who was trying to help me. When I said yes, she said well that's too bad and chuckled. Ok, thanks lady. She asked the nurse for something I don't really remember what, and I told her that her voice was telling me it's something more serious than an ingrown hair and a yeast infection? She looks me in the face, all while I'm still lying on the table being poked at. She says 'I think it's herpes'. All I could think was, of course you do. So I asked my questions, like how could it be herpes if I only had one bump? She then explained to me I had many bumps, and it looked like the very beginning so it could have just started coming up that day. And that everything was most likely to get worse. Great, perfect. She gave me some antivirals to start the same night, and I then had to walk out of that building alone and terrified. I didn't know enough about herpes to have peace of mind. I think it was just always one of those things I never thought would happen to me, but then again I never thought I'd get pregnant wither and here I am with a two year old. That same night I told my boyfriend, who happens to be my sons father but we've been on and off since he's been born. Shaking he held me and told me he wasn't mad. I couldn't even speak until I finally told him, 'I'm mad, I'm mad that this is happening, I'm not mad at you.' He just kinda stared off and wouldn't really look at me. He explained to me over and over he'd quit his job before he went to work with sores on his face. Whatever, different argument, different day. As awkward and awful as that conversation was, it had to be done. And that night he asked if I wanted to talk about it, and I just told him I didn't know enough about it to fully talk about it. So I studied, in so much pain I looked up everything I could about herpes in two days. I tried talking to him about it a couple times, he'd always change the subject. He wouldn't look at me, he wouldn't kiss me. He'd hardly touch me. I asked him one night, 'Do you ever get cold sores?' He said, 'Yeah, I just had one a few weeks ago actually.' On his fucking tounge. Obviously I asked him, 'Did you know that's fucking herpes?' He said no it's just HSV1 and it just gives you cold sores. I couldn't even be mad, this was just purely an uneducated accident. He's had cold sores since he was a kid, never thought much of it or just didn't pay attention when people said it might be a problem. Okay this is fine. We're fine. We are fine, i got the call a couple days ago and they said it's genital HSV1. It could be worse I suppose. I read HSV1 is less like to recur right? That's good I guess. He's doing a lot better being supportive. We're in this together now, and I feel a lot less alone. I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm trying I guess. That's basically my short version of how I came about getting herpes. Not that it even really matters. You get it, you deal with it, you live. Don't get me wrong, I'm still coping. But this really is more of an inconvenience than anything.

No, just a couple little bumps

Genitals, but my boyfriend just told me he has hsv-1. So there's that.

I honestly don't know. I just had my first outbreak but I've read it can be dormant for a while? I don't don't even know what type it is yet.

Everything is slowly getting better. I'm not in near as much pain as I was this weekend. Thanks everyone for the support, I seriously appreciate it.

Has anyone else had outbreaks on their arms? I noticed this small cluster that wasn't puss filled. In fact it only itched once today. Too late to call the dr, but I've been covering it with a bandaid just in case. It's just beneath my elbow on the outside.... maybe like 4 or 5 little bumps that are red. ):

Honestly, I was reading online a little bit and it said something about sitting on the toilet backwards. That actually seemed to give me a little relief at least while urinating. Said something about how it varies depending on where your sores are located.

I used one of those and they never really helped me. ): Thank you though! I've been reading a lot about how this feeling doesn't last forever, about how you move forward eventually. I fear I'm just stuck in a bad place right now, and the pain doesn't help either. I'm just hoping it's over soon.

Thank you so much. It's comforting knowing I'm not alone.

I have a 2 year old who uses that bath, and I know the virus only lasts 10 seconds on surfaces, but it still makes me nervous. Is that an irrational fear? If it'll be fine I'll try the bath thing tonight. Also I considered buying gloves to use when going to the restroom and I wasnt sure if that is necessary either. But if I'm going to be applying things to that general area I assume it couldn't hurt. Also, thank you. You have no idea how much your response means to me.

This is my first outbreak. I have been trying to cope and when I first went to planned parenthood, she said it looked like either the very end or the very beginning. Unfortunately, it was the beginning. Everything is getting worse. I feel like I can barley move and I don't even want to go to the bathroom even though I have an urge to do so frequently. I have no one. My boyfriend won't get tested and he'll barely even look at me, the one and only time we talked about it he told me he wasn't mad, like this is all on me right? What if he gave this to me? Why does it even matter? We'll never know anyways. I don't know where to turn or what to do. I'm just trying to get through this outbreak without completely losing my mind.