Hnookierookie

I'm a 44 female and I am getting a divorce. 17 years ago I made the choice to take the HSV-2 risk with my partner who later became my husband. After 10 years of not contracting, it happened. Now I'm going back into the dating world and having a huge challenge. I met someone 4.5 months ago. We were chatting online and he knew about my HSV-2+ status before we met in person. When we got together we found we had amazing chemistry. I'm head over heels for him at this point and he says he loves me too. Our relationship was progressing really nicely. Well - the mental connection is amazing and we are both extremely attracted to each other. We have had sexual relations biased towards me giving him oral sex and me masturbating with assistance. However, we haven't successfully had penis-vagina sex (attempts with condom). This is an important bonding element we both acknowledged is important to take the relationship to the next level. He finally admitted that even though he really thought in the beginning he would eventually be ok with it, he is still frightened of me physically. Both his therapist and I suggested he do more research to improve his comfort level and it kind of backfired. This was last week and since then he has been afraid to do anything - I think he is even afraid to kiss me. He had asked for my patience because he still wants to try to keep us together since the mental romance is so good. But, I can feel him pulling away and it is breaking my heart. I'm looking for someone to talk to who had a similar experience - I need help in accepting the choice I am afraid he will make and to help not feeling unwanted and rejected. But mainly to just help comfort a broken heart with sincere empathy. Please help.