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new diagnosis please help


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hi everyone, 

im a 26 year old woman who was diagnosed with hsv yesterday. im waiting on the test to come back to tell me which type i have. i haven’t stopped crying since i’ve been told the news. i feel like my life is over. 

sex is such a big part of my life and relationships and i feel like i’ll never be able to have that again. im single right now and the idea of having to tell the people that im dating that im positive is terrifying. i can’t fathom the rejection. i love casual dating and casual sex and it feels like i’ll never get that back. who wants to hookup with someone with hsv? can i even hookup with people while being positive? 

along with this i feel so uncomfortable in my body. right now i feel disgusting. how am i ever going to feel sexy again? i know this sounds so vapid and superficial but i was so confident in my sex life before this. i’m definitely a sex positive person but i feel like i’ve lost that with this diagnosis. 

i guess what im looking for right now is some support and guidance. i feel so alone. i haven’t stopped reading about hsv since yesterday and i understand it’s common and more people than i realize have it. but i can’t seem to get that through my head right now. it’s so clouded with depression and anxiety regarding my hsv diagnosis. 

please any advice and support is appreciated. thanks. 

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Hi ❤️ 

Sorry for the late reply. Please know you are not dirty. You are not unworthy of love. You life is not over. 

You are pure. You are worthy of love and kindness. Your life is still going to be happy! 🙂 

The way you are feeling right now I completely empathize with. It can be really scary at first. Remember that even the word "herpes" has so much negative connotation associated with it, and because there is a stigma around it, we feel bad about ourselves for having it. However, society makes stigmas about a lot of things, and what society thinks is pretty much always wrong. Stigmas are based on fear and judgment and have no basis to them. Recreate what the word "herpes" means. It is a common virus that so many people have, and it doesn't indicate anything bad about anyone who has it. It doesn't have the power to take over your happiness! 

Honestly, having herpes can make intimacy difficult at times, but it definitely has helped me weed out the chumps from the good people. Those who are judgmental right away are not people I would want to be with anyway. Those who are accepting and appreciate honesty are good folks, and that's who I am looking for 🙂 You deserve someone who is kind and accepting! 

Be kind to yourself ❤️ You will get through this and we are all here for you! 

Sending prayers and blessings your way! 🙂 

grace

  • Like 1
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On 9/3/2022 at 3:50 PM, Flowerteacher55 said:

Hi ❤️ 

Sorry for the late reply. Please know you are not dirty. You are not unworthy of love. You life is not over. 

You are pure. You are worthy of love and kindness. Your life is still going to be happy! 🙂 

The way you are feeling right now I completely empathize with. It can be really scary at first. Remember that even the word "herpes" has so much negative connotation associated with it, and because there is a stigma around it, we feel bad about ourselves for having it. However, society makes stigmas about a lot of things, and what society thinks is pretty much always wrong. Stigmas are based on fear and judgment and have no basis to them. Recreate what the word "herpes" means. It is a common virus that so many people have, and it doesn't indicate anything bad about anyone who has it. It doesn't have the power to take over your happiness! 

Honestly, having herpes can make intimacy difficult at times, but it definitely has helped me weed out the chumps from the good people. Those who are judgmental right away are not people I would want to be with anyway. Those who are accepting and appreciate honesty are good folks, and that's who I am looking for 🙂 You deserve someone who is kind and accepting! 

Be kind to yourself ❤️ You will get through this and we are all here for you! 

Sending prayers and blessings your way! 🙂 

grace

thank you for your reply. i wish everyone would think the way you do. 

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