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So a guy I’m seeing we been having sex almost 2 months and recently in the past 2 weeks we had sex unprotected twice unprotected, he’s knows about my hsv 2 , (I got the sores above my clit in the initial ob and never got them again)

When I disclosed to him he did tell me he get cold sores and he dated a woman a while back that had it and claims to never gotten it from her (which I believe he’s being truthful) so the last time we had sex was a couple days ago and I found out he was still sleeping with a ex in protected (not sure if this the one that has hsv 2 as well which I doubt) and other women with condoms

Now he just told me the other day that after Both times he had sex with me his penis got irritated and he thought it was claimydia which I never had and still doesn’t but he went ang got tested and it was negative

And he claimed to be tested for hsv 2 and it was negative as well but the doc told him it can take time for antibodies to build

But I don’t think I gave it to him only because he felt just irritation only after having sex with me and he said he think my body fluids doesn’t sit well on his and I think it’s yeast possibly my ph balance is off just wanted somebodies opinion on it he said it’s not itchy just irritated I would be devastaated if I gave him this

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If you disclosed before getting intimate, you did exactly what you needed to do.

If he understood the risk and you answered his questions truthfully, then he knew what he was doing.

He will have to accept responsibility for his own decisions, not you.

If you choose to, you could be supportive and help him to get retested in 4-6 weeks when his immune system has built antibodies up to show on a blood test. If you don't want to, you don't have to.


This is why disclosure matters. Because in this scenario (where I assume you did disclose before getting physical), you don't have any responsibility to feel guilty or to help him cope if you don't want to.

You can tell him to get retested. You can tell him to make sure he discloses if he tests positive. But those are things he has to decide on his own, just like his decision to have sex with you.

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Yeah I told him before we had any sexual contact but I just feel so bad I If I did give it to him I don’t want to give this to anyone I get that he made that decision but I just feel horrible if I didn’t give it to him maybe I didn’t and it’s all my head

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