HSV1 genital transmission from female to male orally??

[justachic18]

Hi all, If anyone has any experience with this I could use some help. I have had HSV1 in the genital area for over 23 years. Very few outbreaks over that time period. You know when they are coming on, take the meds, done. Anyway, I disclosed to the man I have been seeing and while he had concerns and requested I take the suppression therapy, which I did, he still wanted to and performed oral sex on me three days ago. Today his face has broken out below his mouth and he feels a burning in his lower facial area. He sent me pictures and they don't appear to be cold sores like the pics I have seen. They almost seem to be some type of allergic reaction but he can't think of anything that would be causing that. Is it possible that even taking the suppression meds and not having had an outbreak in so many months that I could have passed this on to him and it would show up that quickly? I appreciate any advice or info anyone may have. Thank you! Take care:)

[FunnyGirl]

@justachic18

I think the chances are incredibly low...I am in the same boat as you with HSV1 and have never passed it to a single personI've dated and I think it's because so many people already have that virus or have come into contact with it at some point in their life. This guy however, may have not and it's possible his first outbreak is starting out this way and will eventually turn into a cold sore no? any updates?

[justachic18]

@FunnyGirl I heard back from my drs office and they felt sure it was just a weird coincidence that he broke out or reacted to something else. They told me if I had an active lesion, which I haven’t in YEARS, it would still likely take at least a week for anything to show up. I was so shocked to think it could have happened or happen this quick because I had been with my ex for over 14 years and he has never shown any symptoms of HSV1. Thank you for responding! I shouldn’t have waited so long to join this site. It’s good to not feel alone.

[FunnyGirl]

@justachic18

 

 

It is really rare! When I as infected I had never come into contact with the HSV1 virus and got it orally at first from kissing someone and then also had oral sex from the same person whom I found out had it after the fact. SO bam, both places at the same time and the outbreak was horrific. Worst pain of my life and I ended up in the emergency room and no one knew what was wrong with me until sores finally appeared after several days down there and my OBGYN swabbed yada yada. Valtrex, blah blah blah. I was devastated like many people share on this forum and immediately thought my life was over, but like we've read about a lot of cases of HSV1, after the initial outbreak it was basically crickets for the next 15 years. Other than 2 or 3 cold sores on my lip during that time, I really didn't have to deal with much.

 

In my mind it's always been a little easier to disclose that I carry the virus that gives cold sores because so many people carry that type-specific virus, many don't even know they do, and like you, I have had many partners and always was safe and in monogamous relationships, but even in long term relationships without condoms, I never passed it any partners and many would use my time of disclosure to say that at some point they had gotten a cold sore too or something, so then I knew we didn't have to worry.

 

It would probably make sense for your guy to get a blood test now to see what that reveals.

 

Random side note - once in my life I hooked up with a guy and when his semen got on my skin, my skin turned bright red and had a reaction to it immediately!! Could it be that your chemistry and lady juices just don't react well with his chemistry? It's certainly a possibility!

 

Either way - he should get tested - he may already have hvs1 if his blood test comes back positive and then you can rule out that he contracted it from you and put that chapter to bed.

 

Crazy but with this virus it's all about knowing as much as we can. The more we know sometimes the easier it is to process or work through shame or guilt, especially in relationships, but this virus can be so tricky, it makes it hard sometimes.

 

This forum is a blessing bc it really does remind me that there are thousands of people dealing with this little virus daily and makes disclosure something not so scary bc I know that so many people who have this virus are too embarrassed or ashamed to disclose and by at least being a person that does, we don't have to live with that shame or guilt and maybe other people will learn from and be encouraged by our honestly and forthrightness.

 

[justachic18]

Thank you again! I don’t know if it’s the chemistry or not, it showed up a couple of days later and to be honest, I’m not so sure we will even be seeing each other anymore after this. Disclosure is hard but the fear that it put in him may be more than he can handle as he posthumously declared himself a germaphobe..... would have been nice if he’d shared that before since you can’t get more up close and personal than with oral sex but I digress. At times, I just wish I could be celibate so I never had to disclose anything but I’m too much of a romantic who believes there will be someone again who doesn’t care. We shall see.