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A successful first disclosure


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Hi,

I am a 21 year old female and I got diagnosed on Friday at an emergency gyn appointment because I had such a bad itch down there. He swabbed and sent it off but told me that it looks like Genital herpes. So I have spent the weekend going through my awful outbreak but thanks to finding this forum I’ve picked up on a few helpful tips. 

Like spray bottle of water to help with painful urinating and soaking in a shallow bath of salt. It hurts to lie down and sit and don’t forget walking. So I will call out of work again. But I told my older cousin the day after finding out who is in the nursing field and it was nice for her to not give me any looks! I don’t know when to tell my parents or if I will. 

I just finished telling my current partner about the diagnosis over text and he admitted it was ‘scary af’ but that he was cool with it because it is what it is. He is going to go get tested himself but I was expecting such a bad experience. And it wasn’t even a serious relationship, just an exclusive sex partner thing. So it makes me wonder why would he stick around. 

But I’m just so glad I decided to join this community to get support that i am unsure if I’ll get it with my parents or not. But has anyone else young that lives at home disclosed to their parents? How did it go for you?

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I am the mom of a 21 year old daughter, as well as one who is 20 and one who just turned 18, and I am the one who is newly infected with herpes.  I chose to tell them about it, because I would not want them to ever think that my stress, moods or illness are in any way their fault.  I also don’t want them to worry about me having cancer, which they lived through several years ago.  I hope I am showing them too what it looks like to be honest and trusting, and what it feels like to be necessary to someone.  That is what I hope they reach for in all of their relationships.  I hope that for you too.  

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  • 8 months later...
On 7/22/2018 at 7:43 PM, GreenFern43 said:

Hi,

I am a 21 year old female and I got diagnosed on Friday at an emergency gyn appointment because I had such a bad itch down there. He swabbed and sent it off but told me that it looks like Genital herpes. So I have spent the weekend going through my awful outbreak but thanks to finding this forum I’ve picked up on a few helpful tips. 

Like spray bottle of water to help with painful urinating and soaking in a shallow bath of salt. It hurts to lie down and sit and don’t forget walking. So I will call out of work again. But I told my older cousin the day after finding out who is in the nursing field and it was nice for her to not give me any looks! I don’t know when to tell my parents or if I will. 

I just finished telling my current partner about the diagnosis over text and he admitted it was ‘scary af’ but that he was cool with it because it is what it is. He is going to go get tested himself but I was expecting such a bad experience. And it wasn’t even a serious relationship, just an exclusive sex partner thing. So it makes me wonder why would he stick around. 

But I’m just so glad I decided to join this community to get support that i am unsure if I’ll get it with my parents or not. But has anyone else young that lives at home disclosed to their parents? How did it go for you?

@GreenFern43 what did the text say to your partner? I need some advice on disclosure to a non-bf partner. 

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