Jump to content
  • Want to be a part of a supportive community? Join the H Opp community for free.

    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

Newly diagnosed and wondering if anybody else has been through something similar?

Recommended Posts

Hi everyone.

I’ve recently been diagnosed with HSV-2 and it’s been a hard time. I’m very thankful I’ve come across this forum which from what I’ve read so far is full of lovely and non-judgemental people who offer some excellent advice!

I’m wondering if anyone can relate to my worries/experience?

A bit of background, my boyfriend and I have been together since December last year, as far as we were concerned we were both STI and STD free, I had regular tests at my local GUM clinic and all bloods and swabs were continuously clear. They did however, only test for Chlamydia, gonorrhoea, Syphilis and HIV. Neither of us had ever experienced symptoms of HSV.

About a month and a half ago, we both had our first outbreak. Personally, I’ve never been through anything like it. I had flu symptoms, cold sweats, aches and pains. Down below I was in agony, couldn’t even lay down without being in pain. Unusual discharge which had a heavy flow. I went to the doctors thinking I had flu and maybe a bacterial infection, after being sent to the GUM clinic it was confirmed I had HSV-2, along with a bacterial infection. I got my anti-viral medication and antibiotics and after a couple weeks I was back to my old self. I then came down with a cold, and another outbreak where I got more anti-viral medication, I was so upset and ran-down I think this aided in the second outbreak occurring.

Fast forwarding to the past few days, I noticed and odd swollen section on my outer left labia, I put this down to an ingrown hair as this is quite common for me, however I’ve shaved today and noticed 3 little red spots which look like lesions, and I’m just so upset that in not even 2 months I’m on my third outbreak. Weirdly though, I didn’t feel this one coming on – there was no tingling or itching, I just came across it when I felt a slight soreness when wiping after a wee.

Please can somebody give me some reassuring news that they’ve been through something similar and it’s got better? Also, does anybody have any advice on being intimate with your partner with this kind of outbreak where the ulcers aren’t internal or around my vagina? I’ve done a whole load of research and understand that during an outbreak you are highly contagious, but is it that bad if both you and your partner are HSV-2+? Anyway?

Thank you in advance for any help or advice!

Link to comment

You can't give your partner "more" herpes since he already has the virus 🙂

Potentially having sex with symptoms could trigger an outbreak for him, or if could irritate you/make your outbreak worse, especially since it is a new infection. I'm not so sure - I did not remain with the person who gave me herpes (he was cheating on me) and I haven't had a partner who also had herpes since him.

Also, if you are having this many outbreaks so close together, it may be worthwhile to ask your doctor about daily suppressive therapy with antivirals, at least for a little while, until the virus calms down a little bit.

I have had herpes for five years and in the beginning it really sucked. In addition to feeling isolated, unlucky, and depressed, I thought everything was an outbreak. You will get used to it, and after a while, it is not such a big deal - I promise! 

  • Like 1
Link to comment

Thank you so much for such a quick and comforting reply! 😊

The irritating thing for me is my partner is in the army, so sometimes we have to go 3 or more weeks without seeing each other so I dont know If my worrying I'm going to have an outbreak is causing them, luckily he's only had an initial one.

I'm so sorry to hear of your experience of being cheated on, it's an awful thing to go through 😔

I was thinking about asking for that treatment as well, I'll give them a call tomorrow and see what the doctor thinks.

Have you found that after 5 years you get minimal outbreaks? Thank you for your kind words, I'm keeping my fingers crossed it gets easier! 

Link to comment

I started valtrex daily about 4-5 months after my initial diagnosis. I had sort of "prodrome" like symptoms for maybe 6-8 months after that, but never had another outbreak. I don't really get symptoms at all anymore. Sometimes around my period I get kind of itchy, but I'm not sure if that's herpes or just normal hormonal stuff going on.

I continue to take daily suppressive meds because my husband is negative for herpes, so I'm not sure what it would be like for me if I was not taking the medication. Eventually, I will probably come off the meds and see what happens.

I think daily suppressive therapy could be helpful, especially since you have limited windows when you get to see your partner. Keep in mind that you can still have breakthrough symptoms while on suppressive therapy (so don't be discouraged if you do), but hopefully your symptoms in general will be greatly reduced.

Link to comment

Hi there...the part of your post where you were surprised by your third outbreak rings true with me...I was diagnosed in February with what I think was my initial outbreak...It was one tiny spot but I was SUPER tired and felt very worn out and not myself...I also had groin pain on the side that has the spot...

my second spot however, two months later didn’t have any of those symptoms...I was surprised to see the spot...which only actually hurt for 1-2 days thank god. Now I feel like I’m just waittting to see when the next one happens...sigh 

Link to comment

Hiya 😊

Thank you for sharing your experience with me, it's always comforting to know people can relate to what's going on but at the same time I'm sorry you're recently diagnosed too.

I feel the same, now I'm on my third outbreak I worry I'm going to constantly wait for another and another, catch 22 as I think stress may be a trigger for me.

If you think stress may be a trigger for you as well then as hard as it will be maybe we should try and not wait or expect another outbreak as it may bring one on. 

Its difficult being so newly diagnosed isn't it, trying to understand what's you feel like as well as signs from your own body! 

Link to comment
  • 8 months later...
  • 3 weeks later...

I have had the official Dx of HSV 1 & 2 since 2012. Although, I have no idea how long I had it before since the only reason I had the blood test was that I found out my husband had cheated. I have only had a maybe 4-5 OB in that time. And nothing in the past 4 years. However, Looking back I may have had one before the Dx but was advised by my gyn that it was just a skin irritation from tight clothing. I am not on any daily medications. I've only taken the Valtrex twice when I started recognizing the "prodrome" symptoms early on to try and reduce the length of my OB.  I do notice that stress is a big trigger for mine. I hope you are finding your groove. 

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...
On 1/13/2020 at 4:27 AM, Fmals said:

How have you been? Get your ob’s under control?


Wow it feels like a lifetime ago since I started this thread. 

Well...my now ex boyfriend is long gone after cheating on me and dumping me over facetime, (I sure know how to pick them!) And my OBs are surprisingly good...I was on surpressive therapy and when I became single I decided to stop taking them and just let my body do its thing and I haven't had an OB in months!

Life is good, back in the beginning I was so scared all the time, scared of my own body and the hate I felt towards it, but now I'm happy and healthy and I'm not as scared anymore, and I think this had a positive impact on getting my OBs under control 😊

How are things with you?

  • Like 1
Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...