Lonelygirl88
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Posts posted by Lonelygirl88
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Well perfect...
The man I have always wanted finally came into my life explaining to me how much he has liked me, and has always imagined being with me... It made me smile from ear to ear hearing the words coming out of his mouth of how great he thinks I am. Things I have always been wanting to hear.
Then I remember what is going on in my life right now... How diseased I am, how gross I feel. How scared I am too tell him my secrets. I hate this. Why couldn't this have happened between us 10 years ago when we first met.
I want him so bad. But I don't want to bring this on him.
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Hsv1 and 2 are different viruses. So if he has hsv1 he could get hsv2. And you can get hsv1.
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On 3/9/2019 at 10:40 PM, RaymondPlacido said:
Usually stickin your choo choo in a cave (mouth or underground tunnel) that has HSV 2(Man or woman) will do the trick . Im not sure how I havent been kicked off this site already for my inability to give a straight answer that doesnt leave someone more perplexed than they already were but hey , Im still here . Someone please save this person from my awkward urge to use humor in every aspect of life
Haha love you sense of humor
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He could possibly not know he has it.
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He can be asymptomatic and not showing any signs but could still pass on the virus through shedding.
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Yea starting new does sound like a great opportunity to start fresh... I'm just stuck trying to figure out how to make great. I just feel so lost. I use to be the life of the party.. so filled with energy. Now I just feel like a damn lump. I hate being so negative.
I just can't wait to feel like I have my life back. I wish I could get into exercising but I hate it haha.
Maybe once I start working again and making money I'll start feeling better, hopefully.
Thank you for replying.
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It's most likely a recent exposure if it's not in your blood yet. But yes swabs are more accurate. When is the last time you had sex?
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I just want a best friend... A partner. I have wasted my life with men who were never considered a best friends or a partner and I hate it... And now, I have this stupid thing in my life..
I see so many friends with their best friends and I just want to trip them lol.. not literally.
My sister just married the man if her dreams and he is the best partner for her. Happy but seriously jealous. They both have great jobs and s great house. I just became a single mom l, had to move to a new state, leave my nice career. I feel like I just lost everything and hit rock bottom. I'm seriously hating my life.
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Hopefully you didn't.. I feel the same though.. I get things that pop up on my mouth not like cold sores or anything but just like weirdness... I know for sure I have hsv1 gentially because all my issues mainly are down there.. or I have some other damn virus that doctors don't test for.
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On 6/14/2018 at 3:07 AM, RegularGuy said:
Great to hear that!
I know you will be awaiting your appointment with plenty of anticipation, and probably a lot of curiosity about how things will go.
In the meantime, keep practicing building up your self-image.
An honset fact about myself that might be honest to the point of awkward:
When I'm going through tough times, I literally look at myself in the mirror and say, "I'm awesome". Usually I will do it when things aren't going great, but I'm doing my best to overcome.
It feels really silly at first, but the goal is to hear myself say it, see the things in both my personality and my body that I like, and keep focused on what I have to be grateful for.
Something like "I'm awesome!" And "I'm awesome because I'm dependable and I'm always there for my family." Is usually what I would say to myself. It has quickly become the first step Ibtake when I realize I'm feeling down and struggling to feel good about myself.
There have been many years of struggle that I practiced steering my thoughts toward self appreciation and encouraging myself to see that I'm putting in a really respectible effort in everything, despite circumstances not working out the way I had wanted.
Your method of steering your train of thought and gaining the resilience and self appreiation you need might be totally different, but the "I'm awesomes" as I call it has really helped me. While you wait for your appointment, maybe it would help to try some things like what I do, or other methods of gaining self appreciation. If you already have a few things that work, keep doing that, too.
You are awesome. I love reading your advice that you give to people... Very encouraging. It's nice to read.
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So if there discharge I have been experiencing is from herpes since all the doctors say it's normal even though I know my body and know it's not freaking normal... How can I get rid of it? Had anyone experienced this and then got it resolved from something. I'm trying not to get on valtrex it anything like that. Is there anything else that you've tried and it worked? I just want this to go away.
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Yes I've had a blood test. I haven't been able to get a sore to swab yet. I've had canker sores that I could have had swabbed but of course the doc would say oh this is def. Not herpes, canker sores are harmless...
I haven't had the pleasure of disclosing to anyone yet. I'm kind of hating relationships right now. I moved away and had to leave my awesome great praying job so now I need to pick up my dang pieces and get my life back... Whatever that means.
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How have you kept him clean all this time?
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Well shit that worries me bc I am afraid that I have caught hsv2 but so far all of my tests have been negative but my last test was only at 9 weeks post exposure... So that means I could still have it.. this fucking sucks. The waiting fucking sucks.
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I'm sorry you are going through this but only swabs can really tell you if it is orally or genitally. Have you ever had symptoms in or around your mouth? You could have it in both locations. I have hsv1 and I really believe I have it in both places but I have more issues genitally.
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Well good luck with your crush.. I really hope it works out for you. She should definitely appreciate you being honest with her and actually giving her a choice.
Hopefully one day we will see a cure.
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I'm 30 and I feel like my relationship days are over but I def. Need to work on myself now and my career. I've been with a guy for 6 years who never appreciated me or made me feel special or even really wanted.. so it really did a number on my selfesteem.. I really want to learn how to love myself and feel like me again.. having this diagnosis sucks major balls but it could be worse and I am definitely not dying... If a man wants me then great, I hope I can finally have a love I've always thought I deserved..
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On 1/3/2019 at 7:45 PM, Iwillbeok said:
@sweetlove884 @Ishmael thank you guys for your comments. Right now I’m telling people the story of the break up and they’re all saying “get back on the saddle, you’ll meet someone quickly” and I just whisper to myself “but i have H ... who’s gonna want me?” I KNOW, that is silly talk, but it’s like the diagnosis just happened all over again. I’m doing the self love thing hard right now. Therapist, gym, spa, church, shopping.... what ever makes me feel good. I just wish I had live people I could talk to. I need to find an in person support group l, so I can see real people. I know I WILL be ok (like my user name) but right now it’s pity party of 1....
I want live people too. I just moved to a different state and so I know no one..it sucks and I did find a live support group but it is like an hour and half away from me uggh of course it would be. For me though, I'm ready to be single for a while.. getting diagnosed with this has made me hate sex and no want it anymore .. being in a realtionship which yes I understand, it was just a shitty one , but being in it made things stressful,and depressed, and angry... I was more stressed then I was happy and that is sad. I mean if a man comes falling into my lap the great I'll take him but I'm definitely not going to be looking or anything. I have become unhappy with myself for years before h and now I am becoming even more unrecognizable to myself. I am going to try to make myself happy now... Do what ever the hell I want and not have to answer for nothing. Ya I'll miss sex sometimes but look where sex has gotten me.. sorry for my rant lol
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Yes I am definitely considering it. Looking into all of the details. Thank you 😊
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I'm sorry about your positive result. I hope your doing ok
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Hey hun. It really sucks we are all feeling this way. My mom is starting to yell at me because of the dumps I've been in and she is sad seeing me like this. I want to feel better. I want to be happy again. I want to go back thinking this is all just symptoms of a uti.. I want to tell more friends so I can have more people to talk about it with but then I choke and talk about something else. It sucks too because I know my best friend has oral herpes but she denies it and just thinks she has fever blsters so I don't want her judging me or telling the other girls she hangs out with. I am thinking that I'm not wanting to date though. Which sucks because I love having someone by my side but I'm so unhappy with myself that I don't want to bring someone in to my unhappiness. I have so much to clean up in my life though that I need to focus on. My mom has been single for 6 years and she says yes Shee is lonelybu she also likes being free and being able to do whatever she wants and not have the drama. I just want friends damn it. Some good friends that I can rely on and have fun with.
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Seeing you write that makes me feel a lot better. I hope one day I can get back to a somewhat normal feeling life.
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And you didnt know you had it and your kid is fine... Uggh I should just stop freaking out so bad. This stupid thing just has me so scared, especially around my daughter. I just hate that my mistakes can be hers on accident some how. I hate this.
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How do you know you've had it for 10 years?
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Well perfect
in The herpes talk: disclosing
Posted
I can't. It's not just that.. it's the fact that I don't want to hurt him... I have been so exhausted since catching this thing... I am fatigued everyday. Just what this does to me, I don't want to put it on someone else... Esp not someone I love.