ambitious85

Hi everyone! Hope you're well! I've been MIA for quite some time so it's nice to get back to the community. I have a question. So, I have had herpes-2 for more than a year with basically no outbreaks, save for when I was terribly sick back in November. But, I noticed this flat piece of skin that would look like a herpes sore if it was raised...but it's not, and most of the time it just looks like somewhere that I've scratched and the skin is healing over. Occasionally it'll get raised like an ingrown hair and have a little fluid, and get kinda red. Is that my herpes cus I'm lost and I'm hoping it is and not something weird and abnormal :/ Anyone else have anything like that? Also, past the initial reaction, I've been doing great! Granted I haven't had outbreaks to deal with really and I've been single, but the disclosures I have had went fine. I think one rejected me because of it, but they couldn't handle me anyway. I guess what I'm trying to say is LIVE YOUR LIFE! This is really so small in the grand scheme of things, and as the old saying goes "those who matter, won't mind, and those who mind don't matter." Sending love to you all. Also I met a wonderful friend off of this website, so if anyone needs a buddy, I'm down. :)

Hey girl - I found out I had it last year, when I was 19 too. Obviously, I'm 20, and it was just as scary for me as it is for you now. However, it will get better. If it helps, I've had a quite a few disclosures since then, and I haven't had a really negative one at all, and I have had sex since then. Not to say the negative ones don't exist, but they are not the end all be all, and they are also usually a product of societal stigma. You've definitely come to the right place. And about not valuing yourself and giving yourself to all the wrong people -- I understand. I got it from a 42-year old married man who took advantage of me, to put it frankly. You are not alone. It's scary now, but the most important thing to remember that really, this is a skin-condition. I've had eczema all my life, and that's what I like to compare herpes to -- a permanent skin condition. It's just germs, the only thing different is HSV1 oral has a euphemism, and HSV 1 & 2 genital don't -- but it's caused by the same virus hun. As far as relationships, a friend told me something I like -- this will scare any AVERAGE JOE that's not educated... but you're better than an average joe and you deserve more (just in the course of life). And, WCSDancer2010 is awesome, she helped me, she'll help you, she helps all of us. And I agree with Mmissouri and PositivelyBeautiful as well. I'm more than willing to be a text buddy if you'd like, especially since we're so close in age. Life threw you a curve ball, but trust, this is life (there will be other curveballs, but there will also be home runs!). and things could be MUCH worse. You will be alright... and even fantastic, with time. Sending love and strength your way! <3

Hey everyone, I don't have much of a particular "success" story, but I have disclosed to three different people, and all have had great reactions. Friends have been truly supportive too. It's almost been a year since my diagnosis, and although those three guys were great, I know I won't end up with any of them... My question is, does anyone feel like they are stuck? One of the guys I did end up having sex with, I felt like I had to hold on to him because I wasn't sure if I could find someone else to accept it like he did.. and even though the contradiction is staring me in the face (there's been more than him that have been fine with it) I noticed they also have had some sort of disclosure for me as well. Anyone else feel stuck like that and how did you overcome that rut? I hold onto people because they accept my herpes positive status, not necessarily because they treat me right. And that's terrible :(

Fox news is really just terrible in general. So you can't play sports because of a skin condition? Like it was such poor reporting it sounded like those false stories you see on Facebook. Ugh.

@WCSDancer2010 Thanks for all the great advice. I've accepted H as my wingman because it has really taught me to stop giving myself who don't deserve me, which might just be one of the most valuable ones! You know, if it's not one thing, it's another. No one is perfect. It humbles you.

Hi @WCSDancer2010, I noticed you are really active on here, and I'm sure we all appreciate your wisdom! I know I do. I have H2. Yes, I grew apart from my ex but we were close for awhile, I disclosed to him and he was really supportive, but a couple months later he decided to officially move on. I don't know if my diagnosis had anything to do with it...I don't think so though. If it did, we had become a pretty bad match over the years. I've been checking them out. It's nice to know that you can still have it all after being diagnosed. I'm not necessarily afraid of being rejected either, I just think it's kind of awkward.. lol I'd love to read a script if I could! *hugs* back to ya! <3

Hi folks! So, I was diagnosed in February of this year and I haven't had any outbreaks. I've been under some pretty extreme stress this year and my diet isn't exactly the best, and still no outbreaks. I visited my gyno and she said I may be one of the lucky ones to never have to really deal with it. If that's the case, (well, either way) I still feel very blessed that this was what I caught (in comparison to a lot of other STDS who aren't as..manageable, or have more extreme consequences.) I just ended a 3 1/2 year relationship in May and I'm only 19, so if that is the case...could anyone lend a hand on disclosure? I don't plan on dating necessarily anytime soon, but when the time comes...any ways to "destigmatize" H? Thanks for your help!

Hi everyone! Well, I was diagnosed in early March of this year, and I contracted the virus on the 26th of February (I know it's exact, but that was the only person/& first time we'd been unprotected). I got really, really sick, and I was devastated -- prior to my diagnosis, I was a complete herpes-phobe, which is quite funny now that I think about how ironic everything has been. My partner was a lot older than myself (I'm 19, a junior in college) and he didn't know he had it -- he got tested and found out that he had antibodies for it and had contracted the virus some time ago. Even though I know he didn't know, and I'm not promiscuous or anything like that, I'm still really disappointed. I've done a lot of research and I feel ALOT better than I did before, and I haven't had any outbreaks since my first one. I've told a few good friends here and there, and surprisingly none of them freaked out or had a crazy reaction, which I was thankful for. I also told my ex, who I was still in love with, and he was very supportive (surprised, but supportive). I guess I'm just wondering what happens now -- I'm scared that I won't find anyone to really accept it. I'm nervous about my sex life, and what unprotected sex looks like in committed relationships (I want to get married, and have kids, one day). I've made the decision to be abstinent and kind of just date myself for awhile, especially since I'm growing and maturing more into an adult at this point in my life. I would love if someone could give me some advice or let me in on some of their experiences. I'm really thankful I found this site! Thank you, ambitious85