NothingGoodGetsAway
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Posts posted by NothingGoodGetsAway
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I really can't add anything more than what has already been said, but I wanted to show my support.
First of all, bravo for you for being honest and brave.
Second of all: I don't like to put anyone down for choosing to not take a risk, that's kind of harsh I know, but he is absolutely buying into the stigma. And, it looks like you have some experience in this arena - you've had SEVERAL men go into relationships with you after disclosing, and they were able to see past this. That says something about this *particular* man - and says nothing about you. It shows that you are an honest, earnest, good person, and that he was just not ready for a commitment. Because sometimes H "forces" a commitment decision, right? It can be a gut check for our partners - am I ready to commit? And in his case, the answer was "no." And that answer was probably going to be "no" regardless of H or not...so you might have just saved yourself some heartache!
I'm very sorry that you had to go through this, but it's so important to remember all those that have been able to look past this - and to use this as evidence that he wasn't "the one" - but that the one is still out there :)
Hugs.
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Hi lady! I must say, I completely understand where you're coming from...it's like, you can't really let yourself like this person *yet* because you don't to be hurt from how he'll react.
But what I'll also say is that we want to have some form of control - and usually that control is to put our wall up, to guess that they're going to be jerks that call us names, and we make assumptions about what the other person will say. So we go into a conversation thinking that it's going to go a certain way....and we kind of steer it to go the way we "want" or "think" it will.
So, steer it in a GOOD direction! Disclosing is about openness and honesty, about thinking about the future together in a safe and good way - not about confessing past sins or "revealing" something "dirty" about ourselves. If YOU think of this in a positive light, the chances of him thinking of this in a positive light increases. If you cry, are ashamed, think that you yourself are gross...what's the other person expected to think??
But, I will echo @WCSDancer2010 - if you're not ready to disclose...DON'T! If you go into this, your head held low, then you're going to feed him a different kind of energy than you would want. Also, you mention you might be "better off alone" - if you really, truly feel that way - meaning you want to work on yourself, spend sometime getting to know and love you - that's okay. But I don't think that's what you meant. Don't push away something that could be good because you're afraid. Look at why you're afraid, why you're afraid to trust, and think about what you can do to fix that fear. Let him prove you can trust him, then, before revealing one of the most private things about yourself.
Do NOT think of this as a way for you to help him "not waste his time." Time with you is never a waste of his time! Time with you is time for talking, jokes, cuddles, deep conversations, a movie buddy, makeouts and...oh yeah, maybe sex. Sometimes. But not all the time. Most of the time your lady bits don't even play a role because you are FAR more than your vagina (and unless the only thing that he wants to do is get in your pants, he already knows this). Unless you're ready for sex with him, you don't have to reveal ANYTHING.
As far as a "good time" to disclose, it's totally up to you. But YOU need to be ready for it! In my disclosure case, I was "lucky" enough that we were both taking it slow, and I was sick, for 6 weeks so I had plenty of time before it progressed too far. But when I disclosed, I had no doubts of the following: 1) I liked him. A lot. 2) He really liked me. 3) Physical progress was about to be made. I wasn't telling him because I wanted him to run away. I was telling him because I wanted to build a future with him, and honesty first is very important. Those are the 3 things I think I personally need for a disclosure - you may be different.
In addition to Dancer's links, this is my disclosure story: https://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/6876/super-successful-disclosure-1-month-later-and-some-tips#latest (I posted under a different name, for different reasons, but now I want to share)
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I've been wondering this same question, since I'm now in a committed relationship and we're becoming more comfortable with each other...but I'm working to become mentally comfortable with it, to believe the experts on this forum and in this space.
I found this link very helpful, from Terri Warren from Westover Heights - very to the point-
https://www.sexualhealth.com/i-have-genital-herpeswill-my-boyfriend-ever-be-able-to-give-me-oral-sex-without-protection_question_294/ (My favorite part is where she is upfront about what will happen if they do catch it- very mild, might happen once and will look just like a regular cold sore).
And her response, that in 28 years she's seen 5 cases:
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Herpes/Chances-of-Oral-HSV-2/show/960648
And a link from this site:
https://herpeslife.com/spreading-genital-herpes-hsv2-from-oral-sex/
And finally, from Dr. Peter Leone, a frequent expert cited by Adrial:
http://consults.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/06/18/giving-your-partner-herpes/
Hope those help!!
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Well I can't say I have much more experience (diagnosed in July) but I'm still getting OBs even on 500 2x/day. BUT it is getting better - I think. I was having constant OBs in July, then I had a flare up mid August (several blisters ouch!) and another at the end of August. But, I just went *5 weeks!* without an OB. Unfortunately today I woke up and found another. Womp. But, progress right??
One of my friends (a very upbeat gay man) said this to me: oh honey, herpes is nothing. All of my girlfriends have it, and it sucks for the first 3-4 months and then it goes away and is forgotten!
Some of us won't be that lucky, but some of us will. The only thing we can do is limit stress, eat better, take care of ourselves and time will tell.
Ps I still don't know my triggers - I've been on constant antibiotics since July for tonsillitis and just had a tonsillectomy which I'm preeeeeetty sure is taking my immune system's attention right now. I'm so looking forward to being back to "regular life" where I can see what triggers - sex, beer, chocolate, stress, flying. Isn't that a funny thing to look forward to? ANYTHING but tonsillitis at this point!!
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I was diagnosed in July, and I had sex about 6 weeks after my primary. I will echo @2legit2quit - take it very easy and don't push yourself. I had a pretty bad "cut"-like outbreak that reopened when I thought I'd get creative and threw my leg in the wrong direction. So, remember that even though you look healed, it's pretty new skin so be kind to yourself!
Lube before sex is important too, I've learned - even in foreplay, really try to not let things get dry.
And I've heard the same thing about suppressives - probably 1-2 weeks and you'd start to have the suppressive/reduced shedding effect. Best of luck!!
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I have! I'm a newbie (contracted in July), and went on a date with a guy from tinder soon after. I've put him through the ringer health wise this summer - currently recovering from a tonsillectomy and was on constant antibiotics for the entire summer. Guess what was the last thing on both our minds? That's right, h took a backseat when we both realized that there were bigger health concerns for me. It doesn't bother him, I'm on suppressives and we've discussed how he might feel if he got it. He tells me that it's not a big deal for him, and honestly after being so sick with tonsils this summer, I've gotten so much more perspective about it. H didn't keep me from running or drinking or partying or sex - tonsillitis did that for me!
I really believe most of how others see h comes from how we see h. If we are scared, ashamed, paranoid or sad, that emotion sneaks out of us and colors the expectations of others. If we accept and love ourselves, the "good ones" out there will too
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This is a topic that I'm surprised doesn't come up more on the forum...it's the thought that if we did get HSV, then what's the chance of us ALSO getting HIV? In truth, the chances are very rare, so keep that in mind...
I will say that from what I've read, you can't diagnose HIV via symptoms - *and* that your symptoms are happening way too soon after contact and that you just have a cold.
There are SO MANY things that cause what you're having - your immune system is run down because you have a cold, so you get some mouth sores. Then you start to stress about the mouth sores and then you've got a mysterious rash. Then you get even sicker because you're stressed and you get the flu. The trick is to caaaaalm down, take a breath, and try not to think of the "what ifs."
I've also learned something...if you type in "mouth sores" into google, chances are almost all the results will talk about canker sores. If you type in "mouth sores" and "herpes" into Google, all the results will tell you that it's herpes. If you type in "mouth sores" and then "HIV" into Google, all the results will tell you it's HIV. Google is NOT your friend in this case. Google is your enemy that says THE WORLD IS ENDING YOU HAVE EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD. But you don't. You will be fine. Breathe, breathe, breathe, and go to Planned Parenthood as @WCSDancer2010 recommended.
Also, is there any way for you to speak with the person you had the encounter with? Having him or her be tested will help answer somethings - in my case, I found out that he was "clean" of everything but that he'd never been tested for HSV2, and sure enough he was strooooongly positive for HSV2. Answered some questions for me and set my mind at ease regarding the idea it could be anything else.
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I might want add that the risk should be even less of a time - if you used the razor at 10am, rinsed it properly (and used even a little soap to shave down there), there shouldn't be anything infectious remaining even a few minutes later. The same would be true of towels - I feel pretty confident that if I dry off with a towel, even just a few minutes later someone else can use it. Same with a toilet seat.
The virus "living" on inanimate objects and being "transmittable" on inanimate objects is very different. Meaning, yes - there have been studies that see that *minuscule* amounts of the virus can live for hours on counters and such - but that does NOT mean that it's enough to transmit.
In order to transmit through objects (finger, towel, toothbrush), you need to have enough virus on something (meaning from an outbreak or a big shed), immediately move it to a mucous membrane (eye, mouth, a cut somewhere), and rub it in. So if you shaved, didn't rinse, handed it to your mom and she cut herself with the razor? Maybe. But other than that you're okay!
Trust me. It's funny, because you read what I'm about to say in the early stages and think "no one else must go through this" but almost EVERYONE goes through a paranoia stage. It's good to be aware - wash your hands. Use a straw. Don't mess "down there" or in your mouth when there's an outbreak - but the paranoia will go away. Well...a bit. I still have moments here and there, but they're going away!!
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I have to agree with the above from @WCSDancer2010 and @Anna01 on the breakup.
Want to give a personal anecdote:
My ex broke up with me a month after cheating on me, but didn't tell me at the time. He said we were "different" and left me confused, hurt and angry that something had happened so suddenly and the carpet felt ripped out from under me. I spent the summer pining and worst of all we kept talking through the summer. Then, when he decided that he missed me too much, and I let him back into my life, that's when he decided to tell me. I was already back in it too deep, but looking back I truly feel the fact that he kept this a secret for so long spoke more than cheating on me did.
Would very strongly recommend coming clean to her - it will ease your conscience, and then if you do want to continue something, you both do it with eyes wide open.
Best of luck with your results!!
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I totally went through this - I also had a horrific bout of tonsillitis flare up right after diagnosis (my immune system going CRAZY) and it's been either an outbreak down there or I'll go off antibiotics and I'll get tonsillitis again. I haven't felt "normal" in months, and every time I have a physical manifestation of an illness my brain will go into overdrive.
(I'm a late 20's girl living in a big city, if this helps!)
I hope this gives you solace - your case is an example of the reason they don't include HSV testing in typical STI panels. It's a virus that has such a stigma around it, so those that don't show symptoms, the CDC figures it's better for you not to know because it's not a "big deal" physically (but a pretty big deal mentally).
From reading your previous thread, I'd recommend getting type-specific testing done, so you can know for sure if it's both HSV-1 and HSV-2 or if it was a combined test and you've got HSV-1.
Sure, it's going to suck to "know", and potentially have that small bit of hope go away from "knowing" that you may have both types. BUT I have found that the not knowing just makes things worse. Been fighting tonsillitis that has no "known" cause other than bacteria, and it has driven me ABSOLUTELY CRAZY. I keep thinking it must be something "worse" - because if I can get Herpes from a 1 time encounter with a friend, anything is possible, right?
I'm sorry that you've been going through this alone, but I have to say it helps so much to talk to someone - to anyone, really! I'm actually quite a public person, so I've told upwards of 30 people. Mostly I want to educate those around me as to what is tested for and not tested for, but I've heard from so many people so many amazing things about me and why this virus doesn't define me.
I wanted to share a post I did earlier on perspective, and some of the quotes I've gotten:
http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/6714/perspective#latest
Also, if this gives you hope - I just got into a relationship with someone, and he DOESN'T CARE AT ALL. Which is insane and incredible to me, but I'm too close to it to have perspective and realize what a small part of life it will be.
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Hi Team!
Wanting to see if anyone here has an answer...or an opinion!
I have been prescribed 500mg Vacylovir for suppression, which I took for a few weeks following my primary but had at least 1 constant blister, one after the other. August was rough with recurrent tonsillitis, which required constant antibiotics and steriods, and I had work and travel. So, I doubled up on the 500mg to twice a day, which seems to have been working (with small exceptions that healed well).
My doctor just prescribed me 1g of Vacylovir. My question is, is it okay to take the 1 gram a day, or is it better to get the even coverage every 12 hours (meaning, ask that my doctor give me 500mg twice a day?). I do realize that these dosings are done by professionals, but we allllll know that we're the real experts when it comes to what really works ;)
ALSO - I'm going to have to have a tonsillectomy I think - and the 1g are horse pills. Does anyone know if these can be crushed and/or diluted in some water?
Thank you!!
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Thank you so much ladies! This is just what I needed to know - I'll be careful with any irritation, but I agree it's just the razor burn.
OY soon I will know all my symptoms and not have to second guess everything. It really helps us newbies to be able to ask questions, we really appreciate it!!
Excellent suggestion in the razor burn cream - I will look into that!!
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Hi team!
So I've tried to do some research on this, but wanted to ask if anyone knows the science behind it... It's also kind of hard to research, because "razor burn or herpes" is a super popular google search.
(I'm diagnosed GHSV-2)
I understand the concept of asymptomatic shedding, and I'm beginning to recognize when something is "off" there. I know to wait 5-7 days after an outbreak.
But I have a question around razor burn or 'regular' chafing...if there even is such a thing...
I do shave 'down there', and prior to H I would break out with ingrown hairs/razor burn (nothing too bad, I've had laser so it's a bit thinner!). I'm getting the exact same reaction now - very clearly ingrown hairs (you can see 'em in there!). So, my question is - is razor burn ever "just" razor burn? Meaning, if I shave, and then I get razor burn NOT caused by an outbreak, is there a chance that I'm doing something like weakening the skin and causing the virus to stir?
Also, this irritation is super fleeting - I shaved yesterday, today the hair is regrowing so I itched for a little bit (like 30 minutes), then the bumps go down and all is clear, within the same day.
Is chafing, razor burn, etc EVER just that? Or does any injury down there (even if it's explained) automatically mean that it could be H, and therefore I need it to clear and then wait 5 days before I'm no longer contagious?
Thank you so much!
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I'm recently diagnosed, and I went through the same waves of emotion. I'm the same way - count 'em on one hand - and the stigma is just unreal.
I wrote a post on perspective that I got from various friends (here: http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/6714/perspective#latest) but wanted to pull a quote from my doctor:
"Listen, someone is going to love you for all of you. When I came to this country 7 years ago, I was with my husband from an arranged marriage who was abusive and my son. My husband left me all alone, and sometimes I look at my child and think "who will love me with this?" and I realize that the person that I'm meant to be with will love me and all of this. Not despite of, but because of, all that I am. And that includes my son. And you will find that love that loves everything for you. "
The truth is, anyone that gets to know you - the real you - will want to be with you. What's the saying? Warts and all. In this case, it's herpes and all. There are SO many things about everyone that could cause a bump in the road with the wrong person. Sexually, it could be an STI. Maybe VERY painful sex. Maybe someone is asexual. Then, on top of that, there are the mental struggles - depression, alcoholism, feelings of inadequacy. Or how about financial ruin? Aimless in career? Lost jobs? Your mother lives with you. Whoever loves you, loves you for all of you.
The biggest challenge we face is that our bump in the road is contagious, so we have to reveal it on purpose, rather than organically. But this doesn't mean that you need to tell anyone sooner than you're comfortable with. Trust me, a girl is going to think you're the most gentlemanly person in the world when you court her and don't try to push into her apartment on the first, third date.
You are still you. You are the only one that knows the difference in the "before herpes" and "after herpes" you unless you let this stupid virus change the core of you. And that would just be stupid. You can still make jokes, eat well, workout, and be a thoughtful sweet and kind human. This thing can make you weaker or make you stronger. It can let you recognize and refuse to give in to stress. It can give you perspective on life - I know for me, I just think "hey, I'm still really effing lucky in my friends, my travels, my work, my general health, my family." You still have all of those things. Your life is still there, waiting for you to get back to it stronger.
For statistics, when I tell people they really really help me with perspective. 16% of people have this. 80% don't show symptoms and they don't test for this in an STI panel. With those facts alone it's TOTALLY understandable how we get this. And by telling someone, when you're ready, you're going to look brave, strong, and thoughtful of someone else's health over your own fears of rejection.
It will get better. Then it might get a little worse. But then it will be better. It's a roller coaster for most everyone. Stay strong!!
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That's really awesome! I'm not shy about sharing either - it's our own business, and we're allowed to keep it to ourselves or to talk about it to whoever we want to! If we can open just a few people's minds - and educate just a few more so they can be smarter in the future - there's nothing wrong with that!
I too have found that talking helps - it normalizes it a bit, and most people's reactions are so mild and nonchalant that it's like "oh, hey, I'm NOT a leper?!"
CONGRATS on owning it, and keep sharing when you feel like it!
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It's such a scary thing to disclose!
I think what you wrote is really nice. The ONLY thing I can say is that if you feel like you put a ton of pressure on the disclosure, made it a "big" deal when you were just intending to inform him, the slightly more straightforward the follow up, the better (?) ..
I think your last paragraph is basically perfect. But that's not saying the rest of it isn't great too! Say what you want to say, but remember that all you really want to tell him is "hey made that disclosure seem like it was a decision time. it wasn't. i like you and want to keep seeing you, but this is your call!"
Good luck :)
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Yup that's exactly what I did!
My doctor was hesitant (and honestly a bit uninformed) and said the pills "affect your liver" and she didn't recommend suppressive therapy. But I insisted - I told her I'd done research, that I needed this peace of mind, and if you tell her there's a partner you need to protect - antivirals take I think at least 5 days to a week to be effective! - then there's no reason you shouldn't be able to get suppressive therapy.
Also, my doctor didn't run any tests, which was great because then I was only charged for a consultation and was able to get my prescription!
Finally, you might want to consider your dosage - especially if your doctor isn't well read up on herpes like mine. I believe the recommendation for Valcyclovir is 1g/day for 10+ outbreaks a year, 500mg a day for less than 10. Out the gate, because I was new I guess, my doctor prescribed me 500mg 1 pill a day. On that, I had 2 more small lesions, 1 after another. I got a secondary 500mg refill for the stressful times, and I've been taking one in the morning and one at night and I haven't shown any symptoms. I think I'm going to go back to the doctor to talk about modifying my prescription up to 1g a day - I understand the desire to start us off at the lowest dose to see what works, but I'd rather start with the big guns and then back off later in the year once my body has had time to adjust!!
PS I know it's been said before, but one of my doctors that I saw said that Valcyclovir is one of the safest drugs out there - people take it for other (non-herpes) related conditions at rates of 4g/day - NOT saying that is anywhere what we would do, of course, but it gives me peace of mind.
Best of luck!!
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Mine was same day, she wrote it on her pad (with 12x refills for a year) and I was off to the pharmacy.
The other thing I will mention is that in addition to getting the daily suppression, also ask for something like an additional 30 pills (or whatever the doctor recommends). Reason being: if you take a monthly refill, but you know you're in a stressful/trigger situation, or want to take an extra because you feel some symptoms, you don't want to take one of your 30 days and then run out before the month is over!
Good luck!
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I do want to give another possible reaction (instead of 'grossed out') which is a bit startled and afraid. If she reacts negatively, just remember that it *can* also come from a knee jerk reaction and her being worried for her health. So try to remember that what you're going to tell her may have her worried and approach it from that angle.
And in terms of her not believing you, it's COMPLETELY understandable that you didn't know to test for this. It peeves me to no end that when you say "test me for everything, doc" they won't say "of course. Now, we don't test for herpes in the full panel, but here's why..."
Give her the facts, about how you truly believed you were being responsible and respectful of your health and hers by having a "full panel." But then you noticed symptoms, and instead of writing it off, again did the responsible thing and went to your doctor. It was only then that you found out that you weren't given a "full" panel despite your specification, and the doctor did an additional test since you showed symptoms. You can also let her know that you're aware of your body, and have never shown 'traditional' symptoms, and if you had, would have never put her at risk knowingly.
Just so you know, this is exactly how I contracted this - it was a friend that didn't know he had it, we had a discussion how we were both "clean and tested" and he'd never shown anything relating to the symptoms you read about on the web.
This stuff happens. Just because you have this doesn't mean that she does, and by you calling her and telling her that she needs to watch for symptoms is a big, scary and honest step. It shows that you're strong enough to do the right thing. That you're putting her health above your pride, and you'd rather her be safe than for you to stay quiet and hope that you can keep it a secret.
You haven't done anything wrong, so please remember that. Stay calm, be informative, and you can be sorry but remember that you're kind of a victim here, too. The CDC places the mental health of the many (the 80% that don't show symptoms) at the physical health of the few (the 20% that do). You did what you could to be safe, in terms of what you were aware of.
I've told ~25 people my story, and only 2 of them knew that you had to be tested separately for this. It's insane. You were not alone in your ignorance - I think we all were ignorant before, and now we're RIDICULOUSLY EDUCATED now.
Best of luck!!
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Well, all I can say is that my immune system has been OUT OF CONTROL recently. I had a lingering bout of tonsillitis when I contracted H, then had an abscess that caused me to go to the ER, and then ANOTHER bout of tonsillitis at the end of July with ANOTHER ER trip.
I've been on 500mg suppression Valcyclovir, and my doctor and I discussed that during these low immune times/times of stress I should take it twice daily. So that's what I've been doing for the past few weeks, and I haven't had any symptoms for 2 weeks now (KNOCK WOOD), contracted 5 weeks ago.
Not sure if this is helpful, but best to just not think about it. Know that you're going to be weak, but don't stress about what might happen when it comes time. When I was in the ER the second time I just focused on being as calm as possible. I WANTED to say "oh no this is definitely going to give me an outbreak" but I knew that thinking wasn't going to be helpful at all! And after surgery is the best time to just chill the eff out, right?
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@mtngrl thank you so much for sharing. I'm about to do my first disclosure (5 weeks after diagnosis!) and its so helpful to hear not only a positive disclosure but also a reinforcement a few days later that he still wants to talk!! I hope to be sharing a similar story in the next few days, but really either way I'll plan to share my experience since it's so important for all of us to share our battles and wins so we don't feel so alone.
Congrats :)
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Well to your last comment, if he tests positive in his blood, that means he has had it for 4 months+. So that's something to consider. If he shows symptoms and doesn't test positive in the blood, then it's a new infection...
Give him some time to cool down, as he's lashing out from a combination of fear, anger and distrust. If his violent reactions continue, let him know gently that you understand why he would not want to continue talking to you and that you will step out of his life. There's nothing that you owe him if he's scaring you or making you feel worse.
As h+, it's our duty to disclose. But we're all adults here - before you had unprotected sex, did you talk about STDs? Did you say you didn't have anything? Suing you shouldn't be a concern honestly - it would be excessively difficult to prove that there was any agreement that you were both free of any infections (which knowing how afraid the whole world is to talk about this, I doubt this conversation happened. And if it had you probably would have disclosed knowing you have experience doing so in the past), and he took a risk by consenting to be unsafe with you.
It's a shitty situation, but hopefully he's fine and you can move on!
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I don't have any experience either way, but I've read a few posts that lead me to why reading the success stories here may be misleading:
- the ratio for men : women affected by H is 10%vs 20-25%. So members are already skewed towards women.
- women tend to seek out more support from a group, so they may be active on boards
- women also tend to have more severe symptoms, leading them to seek support more often
THE ONLY experience I have (as a woman that hasn't yet disclosed) is that I have a gorgeous, smart, athletic and amazing girlfriend that had a man disclose to her, and she was 100% going to do the deed after research. However, the guy completely unrelatedly sketched on her (ignored texts, lied about his whereabouts), so that ended things real quick. But that was after 3 dates and a casual disclosure. So I do know that it's totally possible to disclose and have success, as long as you're not an ass.
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@nado aren't we all! I've been clear (knock wood) of any sores or itching for over a week now! (the last one healed last Thursday). I've been on 500mg valcyclovir 2x a day (I've also been on antibiotics, steroids and was hospitalized for tonsilitis on Friday. If anything was going to be stressful on my body it was going to be that, and I think I powered through!!)
Are you on any suppression meds? I think that might help you know if itching is a symptom - if you're suppressing and not itching, and then itching when not suppressing, you'll know more that it's a "shedding" time for you!
I think we are all in the same boat for the first few months! Please see my "HOLY SHIT DID I JUST GIVE MYSELF LIP HERPES" post from earlier this week. Or not because it was just paranoia.
The boards are such a blessing, and those that are so active (@2legit2quit, @wcsdancer2010 and @anna01) on them for the past few weeks are incredibly helpful!
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sex after first herpes outbreak.
in Just found out I have herpes
Posted
Shaving is tricky for me too...I would always shave before, and I'd get ingrown hairs, and think nothing of it. Now I shave, with the same ingrown hairs, and freak out! I've just been keeping it more "trimmed" and might look into another round of laser hair removal.
For me, staying "neat" is just not worth me thinking "oh shit is that an ingrown hair/irritation, or an outbreak?" and then being paranoid and not wanting to have sex...it's quite a cycle. I just got another "cut" down there and can't have sex for a week now...so like, why extend it?
That said, I would just go ahead and try it - maybe once you've got the suppression meds in your system. You won't know what causes irritation til you've tried it, right?