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Hey luv, I was diagnosed with HSV2 in Dec 2015. I had slept with only three men in nearly ten years, one was the father of my kids, the other was a long term relationship, and the third was someone I dated briefly after meeting on Eharmony. I contracted herpes through my last partner, and I was in utter shock. I was depressed for about a week and then realized that it was really going to be okay. I chose not to let this take over my life. I have told my family and my closest friends. I choose not to focus on it, which is so easy to do when you're not having an outbreak. It gets easier with time, and like others have said, the more you educate yourself, the better you'll feel. It's very very manageable. I realize it's shocking at first. I cried my ass off and regretted even sleeping with the last guy. I played the what if game...what if I used protection? What if I waited? I was even more upset because the relationship with him didn't work out. I felt lonely...with herpes. But I was able to get through it one day at a time. No one has to know unless you choose to let them know (or sleep with them!). Your diagnosis does NOT define who you are. It does NOT make you dirty or unloveable. It does NOT mean life is over. It may seem that way now, but I promise it will get better. Any one who judges you is an ASS and isn't worth your time regardless. Let me know if you ever need anyone to talk to. Hang in there and keep your head up ❤️

This was hilarious! Thank you for sharing

@WCSDancer2010 I've always been the relationship girl...I've never been known to have casual sexual flings, since I know it would mess with my self-esteem so badly, plus I can't get comfortable sexually with another person if I don't know them well enough...so using herpes as a tool to determine who wants to "get into me" fast is pretty irrelevant lol. I don't have a hard time saying no to people, but I was on a dating site for a little while, which is how I met the current guy. I don't think I waited long enough to have sex with him, because I didn't know where he was emotionally or if he was wanting what I wanted in terms of a relationship. But, that was prior to herpes, and now I feel that the daunting task of disclosure to a possible future boyfriend is inevitable. I'm not fearful of disclosure, as it is a MUST. I just know that before I ever need to go there, I need to become more secure as a person in order to fully handle any possible situation which may come may way. I find your words very comforting and encouraging. It's hard to be patient. I just want to stop thinking about it, but I am aware that today is much better than yesterday and yesterday was better than the prior day and so forth. Like you stated...it takes time to heal emotionally from this. I don't want to pretend this doesn't exist once my symptoms are completely gone. I need to keep this at the forefront of my mind in order to make better choices in the future. And use myself as a reason to never judge others. I'm trying very hard. I saw a new therapist today, and she prayed for me at the end of our session, which was very comforting. I don't consider myself to be spiritual, but I feel like changing my current depressive thinking patterns is a good first step in the right direction. I need to find fulfillment and joy...otherwise, what am I here for? I also met up with my friend today for coffee. Her story is so sad. Her ex-husband sexually abused their three-year old daughter...and cheated on her multiple times...he's in prison now...and she's moving forward and fighting depression every step of the way and is doing the best she possibly can to be the best mom to her girls. Her ex also gave her herpes. I believe he was her first sexual experience. I called to her for guidance, and she assured me that things will get better. I need to remind myself that shit could've been a whole lot worse. I just want to say thank you for your words and advice...I will definitely be going back to those words for encouragement whenever needed. @2Legit2Quit Ya, I think I may have judged the pharmacist a little too harshly. I was very emotional and any little indication of a judgment on me was intensified tenfold. I know he was trying to be nice, but it rubbed me wrong at the time. I'm sure those feelings will only get better in time. I like my pharmacy and I'm not ashamed of my prescription lol. I'll carry the damn bag in my hand hahaha. I plan on going to therapy once a week, maybe getting on anti-depressants again. She's going to assess me for ADD so we will see... There are so many other crazy things going on in my life, the herpes just made a bad situation even worse. But, I went to Barnes & Noble today and picked up my copy of "Ten Days to Self-Esteem"...so I am trying lol. I need to change my focus and be more positive. I need to think of my boys. I need to stop focusing on the wrong men for sure. My energy is being drained by all the wrong things, and I need to reassess what's most important. I took a self-assessment today, and by surprise I discovered I suffer from severe depression and severe anxiety. Fun shit lol. The herpes didn't create that in a week, so I have a lot of past stuff to work through to find my healing space. @herpaderp Thank you for taking the time to respond to my post. And welcome to the forum as well. I've only been on here for a few days, but it's definitely helping. It's a form of therapy as well...to put how I feel into words and get feedback/advice. I've known I am HSV-2 positive for one week tomorrow. Yay. lol. I understand needing time to process everything before talking to your recent sexual partners. I didn't do that. I didn't even have my results back yet. I went ape shit crazy when I saw a couple of bumps, that I called both my exes and freaked out. They were both super supportive. My kid's dad took his blood test today. My other ex is taking his test tomorrow. One is more scared than the other, but the ongoing quote is "It is what is is". Like we all say, we can't dwell on things that are beyond our control....this is part of that. But....easier said than done. Yet another thing that takes time I suppose. I was most afraid to tell my current sexual partner...but it was a strange conversation. He isn't very emotionally available, but his reaction wasn't bad at all. He got tested last week. You'll do just fine. Just remember, that you didn't wish this upon anyone, including yourself. You had no clue at the time, and those girls took the same risk as you by sleeping with you (and vice versa). I'll never know the origin of my herpes, and I have to come to term with that. It was a risk I took, and I was unfortunately exposed to it. Now that you're aware of your diagnosis, you can make better, informed decisions in the future. And it isn't bad that you feel one or both of them have herpes too...it would make the task less daunting. Is it bad that I secretly hope that my current guy has it? Because then we can continue our sex life as normal? Fucked up too. But, I will be genuinely happy if he's negative. I don't know. Like I said, my emotions are all over the place. Thank you again, and feel free to reach out to me if you ever need someone to talk/vent to.

I asked the pharmacist today when I picked up my meds. He said that wasn't even a listed side effect...not common. I still felt the need to buy extra biotin multi-vi chewies lol

Hi, and thank you for responding to my post. I know that roughly 20% of the population has herpes, but I honestly never thought about it until it affected me. I suppose it's that selfish mode of thinking that plagues so many of us... that it's very easy to judge others and not think about something or how to protect ourselves until that very thing directly impacts us. I've been a very selfish person... I tend to think about myself prior to others...I tend to place my self-worth and value on romantic relationships...meaning that I have a very difficult time relying and trusting my own judgment. I am very easily persuaded, especially when I have doubts about anything...and I constantly require reassurance in some form or another. I am sincerely afraid of being alone and not being loved. I have suffered from depression for such a long time, and this has definitely not helped in the slightest. I know I'm not alone. I just want things to go back to normal, but not the normal I had...I need a new normal if that makes any sense whatsoever. I want to change my mode of thinking and be more optimistic.... and I don't want to suffer anymore from depression or allow herpes to get the best of me. lol I liked your comment about H being my new wingman....can you elaborate on how I could do that? Trying my best to be optimistic, I told my sister that I simply have several little friends that will pop up to say hello from time to time. I'm trying to have a good perspective on everything, but I have been in and out of a crazed emotional state these past several days. How do I get through this and become the best person I can possibly be? How can I be the best mom I can be? How do I stop thinking of my vagina every damn second of the day (and not in a good way)? How did you get through it? Oh, I am planning on getting the blood test on Friday. Not sure what that'll do. I guess if it's negative, then I for sure got it from my new guy, but if it's positive, who the hell knows? Damn, I think regular screening should be the norm. Can you believe I assumed that I had EVERY STI test done when I got pregnant....both times? I thought I was in the clear. Even my sister said something today that made me think. She said, "Renee, I could even have herpes. Hell, I've never been tested before either". It's scary to think about HOW MANY people actually have this and don't know it because they don't think to get tested and request the test. Wish I would've been smarter, but that may not have necessarily changed the outcome. As for my guy, he may be off processing. Who knows? I'm about ready to tell him to hit the road. I need someone who will be there when I'm going through shit too. But, like you said....he may be off processing the fact that he might have herpes himself. And that's hard to swallow.... and he suffers from anxiety himself. I texted him over two hrs ago, saying I was feeling down...and no response. I feel so needy right now....

Haha! Lol thanks for making me feel a tiny bit better lol

I'm really trying hard not to obsess over it. I just worry about being treated differently...I don't want this to define me or my relationships. I just picked up my meds from the pharmacy and the pharmacist asked if I was sure I wanted to talk about the med in front of my sister. Made me feel worse, like I have a disease or something. Oh wait...I do. Lol. To me, it's not just a skin condition, even though it is. This effects whoever I may sleep with, so I'm not taking it lightly. I need to learn to be okay with it, but I'm already very insecure....the thought of being rejected or not desired due to this could break me....

Hi everyone, I just found out I have HSV 2 a couple of days ago. I've been an emotional wreck and no one around me seems to fully understand what I'm going through. I'd like to find a buddy on here that I can keep in contact with, mainly to share whatever is on our minds and to possible build a friendship as well. I'm 33 yrs old and live in WA.

Is hair loss a common side effect while taking acyclovir?! I just started taking this drug, and my hair is already super thin and fine to begin with....I couldn't begin to fathom losing any of my hair either...

Oh wow! I didn't know that. I have an appointment with my regular obgyn this upcoming Friday, so I'll definitely request a blood test. I'm pretty irritated with Planned Parenthood because I specifically requested a herpes blood test. Oh well. What's six more days? Lol. Aside from everything going on with my guy, I think I've been handling the news pretty well. I've been suffering from depression for years and have been in a mental funk for such a long time. I just feel like every aspect of my life needs to be altered...my job, my relationship, my parenting, my mental well-being...the list goes on. I was finally getting to a place where I was starting to get stronger and then this happens to me. I just have to remember that I'm blessed in the sense that my OB wasn't bad at all. No pain at all. I had a terrible headache that lasted two or three days last weekend, and my back was killing me. Then I noticed a couple of bumps, but I assumed they were ingrown hairs due to a wax I got a few weeks ago. But, being the panicked stricken hypochondriac that I am, I needed to go get checked. And the news wasn't great. She prescribed me aciclovir (idk if I spelled it correctly), and I plan on taking it continuously for suppressive therapy. I just don't like that I can't have sex whenever I want now. I'm in my early thirties and in my sexual prime, so this puts a damper on things. I just want things to be normal again. I don't want to think of my life in terms of "before herpes" and "after herpes". I know that no one who sees me knows of this, but it still brings me down. I want to be happy with myself and my body. I've always had insecurities and tend to be very critical and obsessive over myself...especially my body. Now this is something that is completely out of my control...that won't ever truly go away...that I will have to disclose to someone prior to intimacy and risk being judged and rejected...I also fear passing it to others. My initial thought wasn't about me. It was the pain of thinking I may have potentially given this to other people...especially the father of my kids. That kills me the most. I could never forgive myself for being so damn careless and then hurting the people I love the most. That's the hardest part. Another thing, it's hard for me to pull myself out of my funk and be there for my two boys. These last couple of days have been brutal. I got in a terrible verbal and physical altercation with my sister (who I live with). She said some awful things to me...unforgivable things...I felt no support or understanding, and now my living situation is strained. How can I forget that I have this and muster up any strength to be the mother my boys deserve? I feel so selfish... Btw, my bf called me not too long ago. I'm certain all these doubts are purely psychological and fear based, but I can't help but feel incredibly insecure right now...

Thank you for responding. I'm new to the forum and it makes things more bearable to know I'm not completely alone with this. I'm not considering this guy my ex quite yet...he said things will be fine so only time will tell. I was in a long-term relationship prior to meeting him and never had any symptoms. My ex nor my kid's dad has had any symptoms but you never know. The current guy and I started sleeping together again in October. Before that, we briefly dated February through April. Probably had sex with him six or seven times earlier last year and have been sleeping with him again since October. We had sex on the 24th of December, and my symptoms started developing within two days after that. I only heard from him once today, and that was a simple text six hours ago...I'm trying not to be overly emotional or needy but it's pretty difficult not to do so, considering the circumstances. I went to Planned Parenthood since my regular gyno couldn't fit me in for another two weeks. They did a culture swab and it came back positive. I had blood work done, but they ended up telling me that was for HIV, not herpes. Fortunately, I'm negative with all other types of STD's.

I've been in and out of crying spells and depressive episodes since finding out I have HSV 2 this past Wednesday. I had my first outbreak over Christmas weekend, and although it wasn't that bad, I'm still in utter disbelief. I've been intimate with three men in eight yrs, and I'm trying to figure out when this could've happened to me. Even though it's irrelevant I suppose....knowing the origin doesn't change the present impact. My moods have been up and down. It wasn't terribly difficult to tell the father of my kids (we haven't been together in five years)...he's been very supportive and caring. However, I had to tell the man I'm currently seeing/sleeping with. We reconnected again three months ago after briefly dating in February. Things were going well, and he had just asked me to be his girlfriend and BAM! I have to tell him about my herpes...what a difficult conversation to have. He said he never had a symptoms before, but would go get tested. He said this wouldn't impact our relationship at all...that he would be shallow if it did. Even though he said these things, I can't help but feel as though he's been distancing himself from me. He isn't texting me as much and it takes him awhile to respond to me. I know it's only been three days since I found out, but the thought of him not being there for me while I'm going through this emotional hurt makes everything that much worse. I'm just so sad and depressed. I don't feel sexy anymore. I don't feel desirable. And I can't but feel like he's trying to fade out....