Although my situation wasn't exactly like yours, I can relate. I didn't have to be talked into the sex, but I thought we both had a clear understanding that we'd use protection.
When I realized he hadn't put one on, I made a comment about it, and he made a snide comment about putting one on if I insisted, but I was too embarrassed to stand up for myself and make him put one on. (I've actually never told anyone that part of the story cause it still makes me ashamed of myself) When I found out I got herpes from the interaction, I was pissed at both myself and him. The first thing I had to do was calm down. Next, I had to realize that, although I believe his not using the protection when we had previously discussed it was wrong in and of itself, there is statistically a good chance he has no idea he has genital herpes, and therefore he didn't factor that into his decision to not put the protection on. And third, I had to realize that, although I can't go back in time and change his actions or mine, I can control my actions in the present. Does he deserve to know there is a possibility he has genital herpes, absolutely, both for his health and his sexual partners after. But think about how you felt when you found out. Now imagine finding out because someone is accusing you of giving them an STD you have no idea you have. Also, if you want to help the people who come after you, think about what sort of interaction will make him take the situation seriously so that he will go get tested and will disclose to his future partners.
Believe me, in the first few weeks I wanted to make the guy feel like crap for infecting me, and I'm not saying I'm totally at peace with the whole situation, but maybe after the anger passes you'll decide that's not the best scenario for anyone in the long run.