Jump to content
  • Want to be a part of a supportive community? Join the H Opp community for free.

    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

5 yrs later


Guest

Recommended Posts

Hi I'm new here, my therapist advised me to join a group where other people could relate. I got the virus 5 yrs ago when my now ex lied to me about having a condom on (I thought he put one on but never did). I was angry because a week before I met him I prayed for GOD to send me someone cause I was so lonely. I had been left previously heart broken by an asshole and thought I was finally seeing the silver lining. I was met that week with thee worst I thought rash or yeast infection but turned out to be herpes. I was devastated, things kept flashing before me like the month before, telling my gyno my love life was as dry as the desert and I was having a drought, or how I was gonna make sure the next guy I dealt with took a STD test before we did anything cause I dodged that bullet with the last guy who slept around, how I was ready to settle down with a stable man. Then, for the same day to find out not only did I have herpes I found out I was pregnant. I blamed myself, him, the guy before, GOD ect.

I was terrified, never been pregnant before and never had an std before, when my gyno told me it was incurable I didn't know what to do. I was uneducated about these major two things that happened, I only read that the child might come out blind. I really contemplated suicide for a week or two and decided this is not an environment that I would ever want to bring a child in and had an abortion. I had always been anti abortion and here I was, I cried everyday for months. I opted to never take any drugs in fear of repeated usage would cause liver damage plus medication gives me anxiety. I dealt with all the painful out breaks that subsided once I figured out what triggered them. Sex was never the same, I didn't want to have it and always had an ob after every time. I wanted to leave my boyfriend really wanted to kill him but I stayed cause I knew that was it, I was really going to be alone now. later on in the relationship I became too resentful to stay he put me through a lot so we broke up. I still feel like it happened yesterday, 5 yrs later and contemplated suicide heavy over the holidays. My birthday was coming up and I just couldn't see things getting any better. I finally got serious about therapy and started seeing a therapist and psychiatrist . I've been feeling even more lonely lately. I feel like I would be flourishing in my dating life by now or even married at my age 36. I've been getting myself mentally prepared to just flourish everywhere else in my life but accept that I'll be alone forever. No guy in my community will date someone telling them they have herpes unless they already have it or they have worse. I don't want that to be my only option so things are just as bleak 5 yrs later.

Link to post

Hey! I’m a 28 yr old black female. There are plenty of black men w/o stds who would be willing to date & marry you. Change your perspective, change your mindset. There is always hope. Life isn’t over. Forgive yourself and forgive that ex so you can be free and receive new beginnings. Also, remember satan sends ppl too. You were vulnerable then, lonely, and satan knew what you liked. Remember wolves walk around in sheeps clothing. The past is the past. You’re loved! You will get that love life you desire! Don’t dwell on being single and alone. Use this time to improve you, heal you, start businesses, put your talents/gifts to use and get distracted doing better in life and before you know it, that love will find you while you’re busy doing you, enjoying life. God is a restorer and healer! 

  • Like 2
Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • HOW CAN "THE TALK" BE A DEEPLY CONNECTING EXPERIENCE?

    Using the lessons of this short e-book and two easy-reference handouts, you'll go into any disclosure conversation with confidence and optimism.

    Download free e-book + handouts

    ebook

  • COACHING: FROM SHAME TO RESILIENCY

    Get face-to-face virtual coaching from Adrial, the creator of H Opp.‍ Melt away your shame and burn it as rocket fuel for growth.

    Get 35% off a session (1st-time clients only) or Explore coaching

    ebook

×
×
  • Create New...