Scared. Need support

[Puzzlehead]

I am having a hard time to grasp this. I have had a very rough month i have been in bed for the last two weeks depressed I haven’t been able to eat much i have no appetite. I have no motivation to do anything. Everyone is telling me i will be ok. But I feel like my entire life is over. I don’t know how to find the strength to do anything. I need to find help

[Flowerteacher55]

Hi!

I am so sorry that you have been struggling. Please know you are not alone. You have come to the right place! 

Having herpes is so hard. As many will tell you, the social stigma surrounding the diagnosis is what really hits harder, often harder than the actual physical complication and effects of the virus. 

The socially-constructed stigma of herpes is just that... socially constructed! The misunderstandings and judgments people have regarding herpes are not true. They truly have no weight. The opinions and feelings of others are no match for reality; that you are just as beautiful, just as deserving of love, and just as a blessing with or without a common virus.

Remember, this virus does not define you. You are not dirty. You are not bad. You are not a mistake. This is not your fault. You are clean. You are good. You are a blessing. And you are not defined by the way people treat you. 

Please hang in there. Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself (even though you've done nothing wrong) and hold your head high. If you have any questions, please reach out. We are so proud of you for reaching out on this forum. Depression causes such isolation, but you have taken steps in the right direction to heal.

You can make it through this, and we are all here to support you every step of the way. ❤️ 

I am praying for you! 

Blessings,

Grace

 

[Neverwouldathought]

I share your pain. 40yo and contracted this in the spring. I’m petrified. I know things will eventually be OK somehow. I just can’t see it right now. All we can do is put 1 foot in front of the other. We have to be strong, get up and face the day. Pull ourselves up, find a way to eat (granola bars, protein shake, fruit) force it down. Make it happen. When it rains it pours but the sun will come out again. It’s Inevitable. Hang on tight and keep fighting. 

[Flowerteacher55]

@Neverwouldathought

Hi! Good advice, especially about the importance of fueling our bodies with food ☺️. Without good food and water we feel even more sad and unable to focus, which reduces appetite even more, and this creates a dangerous cycle.

What you said about perseverance reminds me of a  Bob Marley quote, "You never know how strong you are till being strong is the only choice you have." 

It also reminds me of one of my all time favorite Tom Petty songs, "I Won't Back Down."  It's my empowerment song!! I totally reccomend it to you all ☺️. Gotta have a go-to anthem that boosts your spirit! 

I hope you are doing well!

 

 

[Neverwouldathought]

30 minutes ago, Flowerteacher55 said:

@Neverwouldathought

Hi! Good advice, especially about the importance of fueling our bodies with food ☺️. Without good food and water we feel even more sad and unable to focus, which reduces appetite even more, and this creates a dangerous cycle.

What you said about perseverance reminds me of a  Bob Marley quote, "You never know how strong you are till being strong is the only choice you have." 

It also reminds me of one of my all time favorite Tom Petty songs, "I Won't Back Down."  It's my empowerment song!! I totally reccomend it to you all ☺️. Gotta have a go-to anthem that boosts your spirit! 

I hope you are doing well!

 

 

I wish I was doing well. But I’m smart enough to know that storms end and clouds clear. Just gotta wait it out and push through. Sink or swim. Two options. Hard to see any light at the end of the tunnel but I know that eventually there will be relief and rest from all this horrible anxiety and pain. It’s so hard being alone and scared but that Marley quote is spot on. Same with friends. It’s times like these where true friends come out of the woodwork and make it clear who they are and are not. 
 

the whole thing sucks. That needs to be accepted and embraced. Sometimes things just suck and are completely devastating. Embrace it. Be sad, destroyed, feel hopeless. It’s a starting point. But be strong, be tough and keep swimming.  Can’t get to shore unless you do. 

[Flowerteacher55]

Yes!! 110%. It's totally okay to feel sad or angry or upset. All emotions are valid and okay, its what we do with them that matters. Processing pain is part of the human experience. It's better to let it out in the moment than hold it in and let it bubble and build up later. And, the great thing about the human experience, is that we experience it with other humans!! No person is an island. It's okay to ask for help, and people generally like to rise to the occasion and help those they care about. It's good to give others the opportunity to help you. Just like it feels good to help others, it's great to give other the opportunity to feel that connection, too!! ☺️

Also, so true about friendship! The most true thing is actions speak louder than words. As Maya Angelou said, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time," and listen. 

Or, as an arborist I know says, "If you're going through hell, keep on going, because why would you want to stop? You're in hell!" 😂

No matter what you are going through, know you are loved and that the world needs you. ❤️

Here comes the sun, friends! Stay strong ☀️❤️

[Destroyerr]

On 8/9/2021 at 1:01 AM, Puzzlehead said:

I am having a hard time to grasp this. I have had a very rough month i have been in bed for the last two weeks depressed I haven’t been able to eat much i have no appetite. I have no motivation to do anything. Everyone is telling me i will be ok. But I feel like my entire life is over. I don’t know how to find the strength to do anything. I need to find help

 

[Destroyerr]

I am right there with you. 
 I am mentally and physically defeated.

After visiting my bf in a state across the country from me, I had a really bad UTI. Then my period came, and on 8/4 I tested positive for covid. Same day I noticed tiny blisters on my left labia. I had hoped it was contact dermatitis. I had std labs redone. Yesterday HSV2 was confirmed. 
 

I feel so sad.

 

[Flowerteacher55]

Hi! @Destroyerr!

Please know that you are not alone. We are all here to support you however you need.   

I am so sorry about your recent medical struggles! That is a terrible combination to have- COVID and herpes! 😞 

Please know that you are not bad. You are not dirty. You are not a mistake. You are good. You are clean and pure. You are a blessing! 

Right now, it sucks. Cry it out, snuggle with a blanket, and put on some tunes. However your feeling is valid. It's what we do with those feelings that is key! Don't take it out on you. This isn't your fault. 

Having this common virus doesn't change who you are. You are a human being with a common virus, and that is just a part of being a human. 

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask them here. If you need to vent, go ahead! We are here to listen and/or offer advice, whatever you need.

I am praying for you and sending blessings of health your way ❤️ 

-- Grace

 

[Puzzlehead]

Thank you all. I appreciate it. I need it. I am definitely at rock bottom i hope i can find the strength to climb out. has anyone ever went to a support group for this?

[Flowerteacher55]

Hi!! 

Yes! Actually, there are many support groups for this. 

Planned Parenthood has been known to offer support groups for those with STIs. Many clinics also offer these support groups. If you would want help searching for support groups in your area, I'd be more than happy to help you! 

A member of this online community was thinking of creating an online weekly Zoom session for those who wanted to meet and talk and vent and know they weren't alone. If you are interested in this, maybe we could make this idea become a reality ☺️! 

Hang in there. You can do this. Tomorrow needs you. The world is a better place because you are in it. ❤️

Blessings and Hope, 🌄

Grace

[Neverwouldathought]

12 hours ago, Destroyerr said:

I am right there with you. 
 I am mentally and physically defeated.

After visiting my bf in a state across the country from me, I had a really bad UTI. Then my period came, and on 8/4 I tested positive for covid. Same day I noticed tiny blisters on my left labia. I had hoped it was contact dermatitis. I had std labs redone. Yesterday HSV2 was confirmed. 
 

I feel so sad.

 

Just so you know, there is a very high chance that it was not a UTI and was an internal HSV outbreak… look into it.