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Scared to let him know I have herpes, need advice.

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I have been with my boyfriend for a long while now and we have had sexual intercourse on many of occasions with protection mostly but sometimes without. A couple of weeks ago I got really sick (fever, chills no energy whatsoever) and noticed a blister/pimple that looked bad on my back. So I went to have it checked out right away. My doctor said it looked to be shingles and put me on medication for it but just to be sure my doctor ran a culture on it. So for a week and a half i took the medication which really put me out couldn't do much of anything but sleep. Then I get a call back from my doctor, they said oh sorry we were wrong its herpes 1, not to worry though its not genital herpes. So later that day I told my boyfriend all about it assuring him it wasn't genital herpes. He was upset but excepted the reality. My doctor wanted me to come back in to take a blood test to make sure the culture was correct so I did. During that appointment I had a million questions, and mostly about which herpes I had and if there was a chance I had genital herpes. They reassured me that I indeed had herpes 1 because of the area I had the blister and that I didn't have it on my genitals. Then 2 days ago I get a call from my doctor about my blood test result's, and found out that I have genital herpes and not herpes 1 and that I should go back in to take more blood tests to see if I have anything else. I have never had breakouts before. Before I got with my now boyfriend I had std tests run on me which all came out negative. And have only slept with one other person who I used protection with.


My question is this, how do I tell my boyfriend that I have genital herpes now and not herpes 1 after i had already reassured him earlier in the week that it was herpes 1?


Im now informed from reading about herpes on the internet that there is not much difference from the two other than where the breakouts happen. If I would have known earlier in the week that it was genital herpes I would have defiantly told him right away.


What really sucks is I just found out about all of this. I may have given it to him, or maybe its the other way around. Maybe he had it all along and didn't know and gave it too me. Either way though I want to tell him so he can get tested. I love him with all my heart, Im scared he will leave me. I know if it was the other way around I would not leave him.


Any advice will help, I plan to tell him tonight.

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If it were me, I would tell him. I think you will feel guilty if you do not. Plus, you love him, right. He deserves to know. Yes, he might leave you, buy he may not. He may even respect you more to know you were very honest with him. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

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Nettles and edmanrck are right...he needs to get tested. That is always the dilemma we go through with this...he might leave. Yes he might, and if he does he's hardly the person you want around if you got any other illness or major challenge in your life. You know how you love him, enough to not leave if the circumstances were reversed, this is a test of both of your love..you have to love enough to tell and he will show whether he truly loves enough to accept. And that is not about you...that will show his personal capacity to truly love...this situation is just the test. Just be honest with like you have here with us. Sending you good thoughts.

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