Anyone paranoid about getting another std?

[whitedaisies]

I have ghsv1....I think lol

 

Anyway I am super paranoid now bc I realize how easy it is to get this stuff. Paranoid about hiv, hepatitis, hsv2....my body hasn't reacted the best to Hsv1

 

Anyone else feel this way...like yes I disclose but what if they don't? What if they don't test or say they test and really don't?

 

When I read these posts of hook ups it makes me think God...how does anyone have casual sex?

[mandymoon]

totally. there's plenty of more where that comes from. Imagine how many people think their negative and they just dont wanna know. dude if herpes only popped up most likely once like chicken pox it would be much more different. we need those results!!

[whitedaisies]

This new guy I am seeing i asked him to get tested. He said he did in November. I just asked if he would retest and I would too and we can exhamge results. I know it's cold and weird but I met him on line and I don't know him from Adam.

 

He is curious why I am so paranoid about it. I said bc I have children and chronic fatigue (disclosed my hsv1 status already) which is just ridiculous bc I haven't been diagnosed. Anyway, I am insisting on seeing results before sex. Is that weird? Anyone do that?

 

How the hell do people hook up anymore? Or even trust enough to have sex? I have 3 kids and not the greatest health. I don't want anything else.

 

Can anyone share their experience. I just feel sooo uncomfortable. Like I am being a hard ass about it.

[2Legit2Quit]

I got the gardasil shot when I was 27, so not really. At the same time, I'm not sexually active and haven't been since I got H a yr n half ago, let alone before I got it but that one time. Outside of HIV, I can't fathom something more upsetting than H, as everything else goes away w meds or on it's own, such as HPV. I don't fear it, because I will only be w a future partner who is tested.

 

I'm guessing you're referring to just casual hookups? In that case, that was always a risk for us even before herpes, doesn't chnage now . w that said, you're using condoms, so unless it breaks you don't have to worry, except for HPV possibly. For me the the risk never changed, I was just stupid one night., knew better, but still took their word.

 

I don't think it's weird to ask for that and I did too w the last guy I dated. He seemed very offended by me asking for this and I take that as a red flag. You have the right t ask for that, when you're allowing someone access to your body like that. Did you tell him that you have ghsv 1?..

 

Other's I've seen on here for casual sex, aren't worrying like you are and are just using protection. Most causal sex, doesn't come to the point of asking to exchange test results, it's just hooking up, unless you get a designated fuck buddy. You just have to decide if you're good w a one night stand not knowing anything else or if you want the other to be tested, then stick w it. You're not weird for wanting to know. I will never have sex again, w out ensuring the other was tested and then not unprotected for another 3 months after their last test w me. I don't blame you at all. Hugs! I know we been through the ringer @whitedaisies !

[whitedaisies]

I feel awkward I guess

 

Like why do I have a right to be a hard ass when I have sthng that can infect him but hey I have hsv1!!! He's probably been with many who have it and don't know

 

I can just tell things are leading to sex and God I want sex. He's super cute and nicely built and sweet and well endowed lol. So I want to speed up the process so I can have sex with a clear conscience

 

I have asked him to see paper results. I feel like a weirdo bc I won't take his word but hell who wants to risk their health!?

 

Anyway it's taking the sexy out of sex which sucks.

 

But I refuse to do anything physical without it. I told him if it's a deal breaker he can bolt

[whitedaisies]

I have never done casual hook ups. Always knew the people well and never asked for results until after hsv1. I trusted all these men. Knew them pretty well before sex or sex play.

 

This guy I just met. I brought it up again tonight bc I am so damn horny I want sex soon. So I pushed a discussion on it again and I know he wants sex too. But Jesus this test paper thing sucks but I can't get around it. Hiv or hepatitis and hsv2 is what I am worried about.

 

I am thinking if I wanted to have sex and someone asked me I would run to get results and have sex that day. This is more of a beginning relationship thing not committed sex yet but gettin there. Definitely not a hook up. We have been dating briefly and talking and texting lots but attraction is insane for both. It's just if one night I am weak and give in I want to know I have te results plus I love giving oral and I can't without papers. Who wants a blow with a condom?!

 

I kissed him already and still ocd about kissing and getting something.

 

 

 

 

 

[2Legit2Quit]

Because it gives you the right even more, because you have been through it and recognize the real risk! It is your body and health and you have a right to try and protect it further! You own your body, just like I own mine and I will be just as selective, more than ever, because H, along w autoimmune diseases, taught me how much more I need to see my body as something I protect from others! do not ffeel guilty for asking! You have that right girl! I don't think for a second being conscious of your sexual health, takes the sexy From it. I think not knowing and living paranoid for 3 months until you get tested, takes the sexy From it. Sure it's enjoyable for that moment, but after the high wears off, you're stressing not knowing. Knowing before hand that you're good to go allows all the sexiness to exist and to reminisce the experience. When you're paranoid about the other person and catching something, reminiscing about that night, outside of that 30mins, is torture. Make sense?

 

Men seem really weird when asked to get tested. It's completely lost on me. I think it's that they don't want to put that much effort into a causal thing, so they put up a fight.

[whitedaisies]

I agree. I think they can't be bothered in general. They don't see the point or feel condom protects them. I know that's not true but I don't want to harp on everything. I just want the damn papers. My last partner tested no problem. But we had a close relationship as friends. So it wasn't seen as an insult. This partner I don't know as well. Ah maybe I should just forget about dating.

[whitedaisies]

How does anyone do this?! Ahhhh lol

[2Legit2Quit]

I dunno.. That's why I have up after the last guy. One of many reasons, that is. I thought it strange he wouldn't get tested and deflected and made me sound like a monster for asking. He said it was me calling him a liar, because I didn't take his word. Red flag of Course. Saved me timez effort and any pain, so I'm OK w it.

[whitedaisies]

So I was off Antivirals and I gt some bumps swore were herpes on calf. No fluid bc none of mine have. Put steroid cream and went away. I think I have other stuff going on. Maybe not everything I have is hsv1. I have 30 negative swabs to prove it. I can't get a positive awab and I have given up trying to get one.

 

I am not as worried giving this anymore it's more getting something worse.

[2Legit2Quit]

I get those bumps on my extremities too. I don't think that it's an actual herpes sore or bump, they're more like an immune reaction to H. Like almost like a mild small vessel vasculitis ruoe deal. I get the same thing in my extremities.

 

We've been talking a long time, so I know your story. O this k like mez your body is just having an immune reaction to H. When I first got H, those little tiny red bumps, looking almost like blood blisters, pooped all up over my arms and legs, but not my trunk. It was like that the First few month's, especially if I missed a dose of meds. It kessonsd over time, but I recently have had a couple on the rips of my ffet an ankles, since lowering my dose to 250. Just an immune reaction, not the virus itself.

[whitedaisies]

Mine aren't blood blisters

 

Look like mosquito bites

 

I have had sex and received oral with hsv- people when I was positive I was contagious (of course disclosed that we went ahead anyway) and they never got it. I can't figure IT out.

 

Anyway trying to get on with life.