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He is being honest?

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I had an encounter with a man that I had known for a while. He assured me he was as clean as "snow". And that the next time he would wear protection if it would make me feel better. I decided to end the physical part due to possible conflicts with work. He emails me one month, after our encounter, to ask if I had ever been diagnosed with HSV-2.

I had to google to find out what this was. I immediately went to my PCP, he did cultures and everything was negative. I convey this info to him. He then tells me that what he thought he had could have been an infection, since it responded to antibiotics and it cleared up in 4 days. Then 2 weeks pass and he tells me his IgG are: HSV1 4.7. HSV2-11.3.. I contact my Dr and he tells me since I cultured negative and it had only been 4 weeks since our encounter that this guy had previously been infected. I am now scheduled to go back for IgG testing but have been advised to wait for a few months.. In the meantime, my encounter is tells me that his DR tells him that IgG can show after 15 days. I am beyond confused and devastated. While I do accept my responsibility for my bad judgement... I find it difficult to believe someone would be dishonest about this...Comments please!

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Hello and Welcome!


So - some points and facts:


If you didn't have any outbreaks your Dr should not have done a culture, he should have done a BLOOD TEST immediately. If you were HSV+ then, odds are it would have been you that was the initial carrier. But the culture with no OB was a totally useless waste of time.


Your first mistake was going to a PCP because they often don't know the protocol on these things and make really bad calls and advice. Take my advice: NEVER go to a GP/PCP for things where there are specialists. There's too much info out there nowadays for a GP to be on top of it all. Go to them for vaccines, regular infections and colds, health checks, etc. Go to the specialists for anything else - ESPECIALLY your lady bits!


To be honest it looks to me with his numbers that he already had it - a result of 11.3 for HSV2 is pretty high for 6 weeks post exposure. HSV1 he could have had since he was a kid... 40% of young people have HSV1 orally (ie, cold sores) by the time they are young adults and 80% of the population has it by age 50.


If you already had H, you would test IgG positive now. If you come back negative now that answers his question. So I would test now. If you are borderline or negative now retest in a couple months so you know if you got it from him.


You can go to Planned Parenthood for the test to get it done quickly - just tell them you were exposed to someone with it and you want to know if he got it from you. If you have a friendly OBGYN though, I'd go there just so you have the support you need while you navigate this 🙂


BTW, he may well be being honest with regards to the fact that it sounds like he isn't getting great info either.... so I'd send him the info below so he understands the facts a bit better 🙂






Handouts + disclosure e-book:


Herpes facts video


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