Jump to content
  • Want to be a part of a supportive community? Join the H Opp community for free.

    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

H (-) and partner H (+) I need advice on how to support him, please.

Recommended Posts

Hi everyone,

I am a 30-something H(-) female and new partner is a forty-something H(+) male. I have known my best friend for three years and during this time we have helped each other through many emotional ups and downs. He is the closest person to me in the whole world, and when he hurts, it makes me hurt. In the past, we have strictly been nothing more than best friends. There has not been any intimacy. Recently, we have talked in length about moving our relationship forward. We both are single adults and our relationship is so strong, that I believe we could make a really great, dynamic couple. He told me during this discussion that he contracted HSV2 last year. During this last year I have watched him suffer from depression and pull away from me and our friendship. This was the only thing that he never shared with me, nor anyone, and had to struggle to cope with this diagnosis on his own. I could see the shame and embarrassment in his eyes when he told me about it. Since we had been talking about moving our relationship forward, he felt as though it was finally necessary to disclose his H(+) status with me. In the last month since he has told me, I have researched the hell out of this and realized that it is NOT a deal breaker. I love this man and want to be there to support him through this. He though feels as if he can never be sexually active again and has major anxiety about passing the virus on to me. I have told him that I love him for who he is and tried to explain that the virus is not a big deal to me. I know that we can take steps to reduce my risk and it really is nothing more than an intermittent skin irritation in annoying place. I love the person and something this benign is not going to stop me from forming an amazing relationship with him. I feel though that this has psychologically damaged him and I am not really sure how to help. I would do anything for him and even if our relationship didn't work out in the future, I would never hold him liable if I did end up with the virus too. It is a risk that I am willing to take for him. I just want to help him through this and I don't know how. Like I said, he has been struggling with this for over a year alone. Help! Advice! Anything, please?!

Link to comment
This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Create New...