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Feeling like my life is over with herpes


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I am new and just found out I have both hsv 1 and 2 .....The problem is I've been celebate for three years now and have never had a symptom....WTH my doctor was very nonchalant and said he would not prescribe me anything until I have a break out...what abt asymptomatic shedding and I don't plan on being celebate forever...I know this virus is widespread amongst black woman and as a black woman I can hardly see any black man wanting me at this point....Never had a fever blister/cold sore nothing

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Hey MileyK, first off, that's insane that your doc won't prescribe you medication. You're right about asymptomatic shedding. Taking suppressive therapy cuts down on that tremendously. I'd go to a different doctor ... one that's more knowledgeable about the basics of this sort of thing.  
Second, please don't fall into the trap of feeling like no one is going to want you. And yes, 48% of black women 14-49 years old has HSV2. You're nearly in the majority!  It's an easy trap to fall into, feeling like no one will want you, but that could easily turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy by you making that true. There are plenty of people out there where a herpes diagnosis doesn't phase them (my girlfriend, for one), and by assuming no one will want you, you're essentially pre-rejecting yourself from all those guys out there who'd love to be with you.  
Hang in there. I know it can be rough at the beginning (trust me, I've been there), but eventually you'll realize that it's not the big deal that we hear that it is. It's only a big deal if you make it one. 

Notes:

  • My mother is now in hospice with end-stage cancer, so I am at her house a lot these days helping where I can until she passes. Thank you in advance for understanding if I am not as quick to respond as I normally would be. This is a precious and bittersweet time …
  • This content is for informational purposes only. This information does not constitute medical advice or diagnosis. I'm not a medical professional, so please take this as friendly peer support. 

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I guess since I've been celebate for so long ...and had NOT one symptom I'm so confused I swear I don't know what to do. I've looked on every sight there is I've seen so many home made cures and super savers...DMSO chlorine dioxide oxy powder and mmr ....like what is all of this stuff then I hear the drugs for treatments are so expensive.....and if I'm having symptomatic shedding how wld I know....so many unanswered questions...

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hey I just found out I have herpes 2 and I feel the exact same way, confused as hell and like my life is ruined. I know this post is a few weeks old but....

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I can link both of you up with an (h) buddy if you need someone else who has been living with herpes to talk with. Your decision whether you're more comfortable talking with a guy or girl. Just shoot me a private message if you're interested in that!

Notes:

  • My mother is now in hospice with end-stage cancer, so I am at her house a lot these days helping where I can until she passes. Thank you in advance for understanding if I am not as quick to respond as I normally would be. This is a precious and bittersweet time …
  • This content is for informational purposes only. This information does not constitute medical advice or diagnosis. I'm not a medical professional, so please take this as friendly peer support. 

Helpful resources:

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