Understanding feeling of outbreaks/Paranoia/How to tell if it's there

[Gimmehope]

Hi there-

I'm wondering if someone with more knowledge/experience could help me understand how to make sure whether I am having an outbreak or not. I am a female, and the other day I checked twice before having sex with my partner. (with condom) I didn't see anything down there, but then I'm not sure if I ever have. There's always something new every time I look. I just go by the feeling of any itches, which could potentially be paranoia because so many things can cause itches...ingrown hairs, etc. My paranoia is potentially getting in the way of our sexual relationship because we won't have sex for a long time as soon as I feel anything. Does anyone have a method for how to know whether they're having an outbreak...even if they don't see anything? What does it feel like to you? I did have the sex and now I am so nervous I may have passed it on accidentally. Please help.