First year of outbreaks

[dani]

I'm processing this whole HSV-2 thing better than I was at first. Right now I'm still having my first outbreak - it's not too terrible, but it's been lasting a bit over a week and from what I hear the first one normally lasts the longest.

 

Because some of the symptoms are pretty mild, I'm a bit paranoid how I'm ever going to know when I'm having/about to have an outbreak - I've often experienced mild itching down there prior to this. I've also heard outbreaks and shedding happen most frequently during the first year. Being someone who gets stressed easily (about this and other things), I kind of feel like it might be a year of frequent outbreaks and frequent paranoia over the possibility of oncoming outbreaks.

 

I'm wondering if I should just aim to stay celibate for a year as I try to get more in tune with my body and sort this thing out? There's a girl right now I'm interested in some kind of relationship with, but I'm not sure if I should pursue it given this. Maybe, if I disclosed, I could tell her that it would be smartest for us to avoid intercourse for a while and stick to other activities. Of course she might not be ok with this.

 

do people think its best to avoid sex in the first year?

[Katidid]

No, there is no rule of thumb....you can read Hippyherpy's posts and see he is a single male and about a year into this and has no trouble with the women. Are you on anti viral? You might want to think about it as it will reduce your shedding and ob's. It will also help your cause during disclosure. Also, using condoms and no sex during ob's or feeling symptoms will greatly reduce your risk of transmission. Definitely pursue the girl

[dani]

I'm less concerned with having trouble finding women than the just the risks of transmitting, even if they are ok with it. I know the stats and that it's supposedly only 2.5% chance for male to female transmission over a year of biweekly intercourse with the antivirals and condoms and avoiding outbreaks.

 

But, I imagine it's higher in general during the first year, and probably even more so for me. I'm still having my first outbreak and it's been lasting over 2 weeks, in spite of taking Valtrex. My doctor just referred me to another specialist to see if there might be another antiviral that's a better fit. But I'm kind of worried. Pre-herpes I've always been an easily stressed out guy and not had the greatest immune system. So I'm just picturing a bleak year ahead of nonstop outbreaks (ironically the anxiety over that is probably making the current outbreak worse). I hope this outbreak ends soon so I can have some confidence that it's not always going to be like this.