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When is the right time to tell a potential partner you have herpes???

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So I'm a 31 year old mom recently single out of an 8 year relationship and I haven't experienced having to deal with my Herpes "head on" until now, I was diagnosed about 5+ years ago with Herpes (which I contracted from a previous partner) and had been in a 8 year relationship I had with my son's father until just recently, So my insecurity is when I'm trying to get close to a potential partner that I end up telling I have Herpes and they say that they're ok with it, but then they just suddenly stop talking to me!!! So I already have had bad perceptions of the disease growing up and I'm having some trouble managing dealing with having it myself... I'm not sure if I'm telling these guys too soon, or am I choosing the wrong type of guys? Maybe the city, state I live in? I am getting so frustrated and it makes me more depressed because it is almost making me think that there's no hope for me... I'm merely frustrated on what to do and how and when to do it... I have a serious burden within myself about having herpes and I wish I would have found this sight years ago, because I feel maybe I would have had a better grip on it?! I am just confused and not sure what to do and how to manage. I feel it's almost selfish of me to spare my own happiness for the sake of keeping herpes to myself. If anyone has any advice, I'd sure like to get some positive insight... I feel this may not make any sense because now I'm rambling.

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Hey dabrat81! Don't have time in this moment for a full response, but here are a few links that might help! I'm so glad you're here with us. We'll help however we can! Welcome!




  • My mother is now in hospice with end-stage cancer, so I am at her house a lot these days helping where I can until she passes. Thank you in advance for understanding if I am not as quick to respond as I normally would be. This is a precious and bittersweet time …
  • This content is for informational purposes only. This information does not constitute medical advice or diagnosis. I'm not a medical professional, so please take this as friendly peer support. 

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