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What should I expect from this?

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I guess I'll start by saying I'm newly 18 years old so I'm a lot younger than most people I have seen on here.


I'm still a little bit in shock by this because I didn't get herpes through vaginal sex, I got it through oral sex which I didn't even know was possible until reading this forum (things I wish I would've known)


My boyfriend gets canker sores when he's stressed sometimes but he's never gotten more than 1 a year and he's gone many years without one. He didn't even know that was herpes and I didn't know the risks behind it because I had never known him having one and we've been together since February of 2016 and we've known each other since 2014.


Anyway, about 2 weeks ago we were just messing around and he just jokingly kissed my labia a few times. About a week after that he got a canker sore (he's stressed about going back to college), and I didn't think anything of it. Turns out, he gave me hsv 1 in that one time, or possibly before that but I have a feeling that's when he did because we are not currently sexually active, and this is the first time we've done anything remotely sexual since October. We always had protected sex, and he tested negative for hsv2 but obviously has hsv1 in his mouth but not his genitals. I tested positive for hsv1.


My question is because my first outbreak started about 4 days ago and I've had these tiny white bumps in 2 places and there's only about 4 or 5 of them in each place. When should I expect these to grow or change, or will they even do anything else at all? I'm not entirely sure but I feel like I have it mildly because I only have mild discomfort and it hasn't gotten any worse in almost 5 days. He was surprisingly pretty supportive but feels a lot of guilt because this one moment of being ignorant about something has changed my life forever, so if you have any tips about how I can try and make him feel better please let me know. I'm not close to my parents so this has just been between us. I cried a little bit earlier today because it finally feels real, but after reading this forum for hours today I feel a lot better. It's literally just a glorified very contagious skin condition and I really wish that better education about herpes was offered because this could've been avoided.


That's all I can really think of, I'll see if I can think of anything else later

Thank you

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So you've seen a doctor? Did they swab the "bumps" and test that, draw blood, or both? What were the results of each teat?


When they test the lesions directly they can test for the HSV virus. When they draw your blood they are testing for antibodies (your body's defences to the virus). When your body is exposed to anything it starts building an antibody response. With HSV this can take up to a few months to show on lab tests. So if your test was a blood test than you likely have had this for at least a few months already which would indicate an established infection. If your sexual exploration with your boyfriend has been only recent, a positive HSV1 blood test would indicate that you already had it, probably on your mouth, and probably since childhood.


So in short how and what testing was done makes a difference in what is going on. And yes, sex education is subpar at best. HSV can indeed be transmitted during oral sex in either direction. It can also be transmitted without symptoms. In fact about 80% of folks who have HSV don't know because they simply don't have any noticeable symptoms. Lastly HSV is not a big deal.

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I got tested before the bumps appeared with a blood test, and he got tested as well just incase, but I'm almost positive I had at least one cold sore as a child so I figured I already had it in the mouth. I didn't get any medication or anything because I didn't have symptoms or anything until Tuesday.


As an update though, the bumps still look almost identical and they don't really hurt anymore, I kinda forgot they were there. What I'm assuming is that I have it pretty mild, but I'm not sure if they could potentially still grow even though they've been the same for 5 days now, and aren't causing more than mild discomfort

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If your blood test for HSV1 came back positive, and you remember having a cold sore as a kid chances are your HSV1 result is simply from you having a cold sore and nothing more. Once you have one strain in one area of your body it would be very rare to contract that same strain in another area of your body. What does this mean for you? It means your boyfriend can perform oral sex on you and you're (most likely) not going to pick it up genitally since your body already has immunity to it from having cold sores. Make sense?


I suspect those bumps are not herpes. Do you have a planned Parenthood you could visit with your boyfriend? Maybe getting checked out could settle you guys a bit. There are certainly risks with sex and the best way to mitigate those is with proper sex education. Enjoy your boyfriend and your sexual exploration but head to PP and get some proper sex education so you can move forward safely and with excitement and pleasure.

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The timing of when I started getting these and when he got a cold sore was what led me to believe that was me having an outbreak, and they do look like some of the pictures of early blisters that I saw, but the thing that makes me think that maybe they aren't heroes is that they haven't changed in 5 days. In your experience does it take longer or less time for them to blister? I'm almost positive that I have it genitally too now because his cold sore was forming while we did oral meaning the virus could've easily spread and we just didn't know.

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