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Motivational post

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Hi friends,


I'm a 36 y/o male, herpes positive.


After reading some desperate threads, I wanted to post this for the new people that have this stressful mix of feelings because of the virus.


Please believe me, all is going to be OK. The stages of acceptance are stressful, but when you are on the other side you RETAKE CONTROL and become stronger and deeper. Nothing beats you.


Life is just as wonderful as ever, you feel stronger than ever, your identity is REINFORCED instead of diluted, because loving yourself and taking care of this condition makes you DEFEAT any stress that initially the social stigma brings. You are most focused, more loving, more caring, and gain lots of insights on life - for instance, how to grow in front of the adversity, or how to more solidly love yourself, or how destiny can be changed BY YOU when odds were initially against you.


You will find one or more partners, and the real people that would have been adequated for you WITHOUT this condition, will react positively to you telling them and will accept you.


You will be able to have one night stands if you like that path (which is truly legit and fantastic and one of the joys of life), provided you disclose and take your medication and wear a condom. Many people that are promiscuous will be OK with it, they are promiscous, tell them, for example in an online dating site. Texted is easier. You can explain the details too so they have time to decide. Tell them clearly that is their decision and responsability to accept it, and there's always a minimal risk. If they decline, it's understandable, but next them. If you are into parties and meeting people "on site" then it's a very different scenario, disclosing is a bit more difficult, but can be done to the right person. If they refuse or react like an idiot, well, it will be probably by fear and ignorance, it's their right to be wrong.


Plus you'll have the chance to:


a) monitor closely the state of your inmune system: now you have a "radar" (the virus itself) that tells you when your defenses are low. When it's time to get some inmune booster, some Nature, some Meditation, or a green tea charged with honey, lemon and coconut oil.


b) you will be FORCED to follow a healthy diet - more so than an H-negative person, because you will have to conduct an impecable diet to avoid outbreaks.


c) you will get an awesome insight in natural supplements. In this "Herpes Quest" we become true savants about zinc, aloe vera, ginger, the super-powers of garlic, or the multiple uses of l-lysine


d) you will have an excuse to start Meditation. Who would have tought about it?


e) you will have an excuse to do sport, if you were not already into it.


f) after the first year, outbreaks will be almost GONE (they say so, I'm in my first year).


So now please stand up and accept the deep love for yourself that you innately have and do not reject it because of this virus. You are as powerful as always have been, only a new list of details will have to be taken into account on your life. A new protocol that if you follow properly, will do nothing other than good to you.


Best regards,

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I pray I get to your point because right now I’m so weak in strength! I just feel like giving up on life! Everyday is a constant reminder of how a wrong discussion can cause you a lifetime of pain. It’s been 2 years since I found out and I’m more depressed than ever! I try to push through for my children but the embarrassment of them knowing their mom has HSV is killing me slowly

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Hi @mstanya1234, as you say, it is not your fault what happened. How could you know? Many times it's beyond our control, and then it hits us. Condoms do not protect us 100%. Sometimes is oral to genital and there's no condom on the equation. But you will have the tools, medical and emotional, to keep it at bay with a high success ratio, and you will feel perfectly fine in general terms, believe me.


For the people who took risks and knew beforehand the other person had it, the prospect of having the virus wasn't a big deal in the bigger picture - and indeed, "after some soul searching", it isn't a big deal, once you learn how to handle it.


Instead of fighting with the past, I let it flow away. Now we are in control of our situation, and we can manage it with all the tools and information we have.


Take the common cold virus, the Rhinovirus. It is a virus as well, and when we caught it we feel miserable, our looks are quite terrible, right? Congestion, fever, mucus, cough, we are contagious, etc. But the people who love us do not love us less because of it. We may have been a bit irresponsible and expose ourselves to cold wind, or any other risk factor that we can imagine. We learn from it. But the symptoms disappear and life is wonderful again.


This is not very different, we have some new important precautions to take, we have to learn to disclose if we are going to meet people, but in any case we are going to be yet BETTER parents (extra love for ourselves and our kids), and BETTER partners and lovers because of it (again extra love going on). Our love doesn't fade away, and our people's love doesn't fade away EITHER.


If having regrets and holding onto the past is an issue, I recommend Eckhart Tolle's masterpiece The Power of Now, there's a book and an audiobook (it lasts like 7 hours, and you can find it on Youtube).




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Thank you! I’m married and have been for 12 years but during our break up I was with any guy and I guess the part that hurts so is that I didnt Even sleep with him but oral and he did fore play! I told my husband and he’s been very supportive and I’ve tried to get him to use condomns but he won’t. It’s hard because days like today I want to just die! I’ve started going to a therapist because depression and anxiety is getting worst

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