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I’ve been doing my research, talked to my doctor but now I want to get some outside opinions. I have hsv 1 and my infected spot was on my genitals. I’ve only had 1 OB which was the initial one which is how I found out I had it. I want to understand sex life and how to prevent my partner from getting the virus. Both regularly and orally. Should I just count out oral sex being that it’s a possibility of giving my partner it even without symptoms or visible ob? Please give all your knowledge on it that you can . Thanks

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Having sex in a relationship where the other person is H- is a matter of some serious discussions. I'm glad you are researching the topic and seeking advice.


I think the biggest goal here is to make sure that neither of you end up feeling regret or shame after having sex. Nobody deserves to feel that!


If you haven't already, talk to your doctor about supression medication like valacyclovir. Medicine in combination with condoms are proven to reduce (but not fully eliminate) risk.

Risk will always be there. Consider what you would do if you did transmit and talk to your partner about it.

Also talk to your partner about what they are comfortable with doing and what they are not.

Consent still matters, even though you are in a relationship. So, it is okay (even practical) to ask, "Are you okay with this?" When you aren't absolutely sure.


Chances are, you will each choose to err on the side of caution for a while until you both become comfortable with the level of risk you collectively decide to accept. There is nothing wrong with that!

Things will get easier and become more relaxed soon enough.

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