I need help.

[WhenInRome]

Hi,

I wanted to post this, hoping maybe people like me will stumble upon this forum and find the answer they’re looking for. My herpes isn’t textbook herpes. Truly, had it not been for my hypochondriac like tendencies, I probably wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but if you’re experiencing the same thing as me, I hope this story helps. If you’re a member who’s looking to help, please help me. I don’t know what to do anymore. 

as my name suggests, I got herpes while in Rome. I was on a trip around Europe and decided to become promiscuous for the first time in my life. I got really drunk one night and allowed a female to give me unprotected oral sex (wasn’t into it nor did I want it, but she was pushy and I felt pressured.) I ended up having dysuria the next day which progressively got worse. After seeing a doctor in Rome he put me on antibiotics thinking it was a UTI and did blood work for Chlamydia, HIV, and gonorrhea (I think he got lost in translation because I asked for a full STD check including herpes but he never did one). Anyway, I started drinking a lot of water and taking the medication and the dysuria started going away. I hopped in the shower one night, thinking it was over, and noticed a lump that looked like an ingrown hair. No pain, sensitive to touch, big, red, and round.  Fair enough, thought it could’ve just been an ingrown hair because I shaved a couple night back and hair was growing back. The next day I inspect the bump and it looks like it’s popped in scabbed over all in about 6 hours. Over the next few days I developed a rash where my groin hits my leg (its bloody hot here and I’m sweating so I still think this is just jock itch). And a couple more bumps appeared on my pubic bone within the hair (still think these are ingrown hairs because I use a dull razor.) Today, I inspect again, everything is starting to heal, (other than my dysuria, which is mild compared to what it used to be but still annoying) when I notice a small white lesion on the head of the penis on the underside. It’s small, white/clear, no pain (not even tender), just there. That’s when I came to the conclusion that I have to have herpes. Why else would I be getting all these random bumps if it weren’t herpes. I truly don’t know what to do, I can’t see a doctor until I get back to the states, so I just have to drown in the fact that it’s not official yet. I’m 23, what girl is going to want to sleep with a guy who will openly tell them they have herpes before it happens. I finally get a chance to be myself and this happens. I can’t tell family or friends, they wouldn’t understand. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just need someone. 

[MaryM]

Sounds like it might be hsv1 since it was from oral sex? I'm no expert, I'm just having my first hsv2 outbreak now.  I suggest getting blood test when you get back to the states to confirm anything.  They can test for hsv1 and hsv2. It seems that hsv1 and hsv2 are common, so try not to think the worst about the future. There are articles available, on this site even, that explain how to talk to new partners about hsv.  I know it's scary and it can change the way you see yourself, but millions of people have this, it's just scarier when it happens to you. I'm going through the same thoughts and emotions here, and it seems so are a lot of others. I hope this helps a little. 

[WhenInRome]

Thanks for the reply,

yeah, it probably is because my symptoms have been pretty mild so far. I’ve heard it’s worse with HSV-2 but that’s just from the readings. Sorry that you’re going through it too. I’ve had little to no pain thus far which is nice, and the lesions are healing relatively quickly (few days and it’s gone down significantly). but it’s just sickening that my first STD is permenant. 

[EmilyS]

Almost the exact same happened to me I went to DR and met a guy we hung out the whole day, drank wayyy too much, he was a traveler coming from Europe, and we did the deed, it wasn’t good and he took the condom off half way through it. When I came back to the US I got checked for something else and ended up having HSV2 and i too feel like I can’t tell family. Make sure when you get back to get blood work. I completely agree with MaryM. Dont stress about it if you’re not sure and do your research. If you ever need someone to talk to you’re not alone the people here are very helpful and I too can try and help. Still new at this but I’m trying

[KRS17]

@WhenInRome

  Please, try to keep your stress levels down.  As I explained in a different post,  when I was 23 I had a man disclose to me.  I went on to sex the shit out of him for five years and never contracted it.  I did contract later, about five years after him, but...OH WELL.  Please, PLEASE all of you do the research, read all the available info on this site and take deep breaths and realize that you are going to be just fine.  Huge support group here.  

  I will say I worry a little at your statement that you did not want to receive the oral sex in the first place.  I have also traveled overseas and have experienced a more sexually open culture than I was used to, so I understand your feeling of pressure.  That being said, I am very sorry that you had an encounter like this. It's not well talked about, but so many men have been victims of sexual abuse/pressure/intimidation or just flat out aggression.  The world has not quite caught up yet on the fact that women are just as easily unwanted aggressors, and men can be victims. 

If I can help you at all, please feel free to reach out.

 

Cheers, it will get better!

[WhenInRome]

Thanks for your advice, 

 

Fortunately, the pimple like bumps in the pubic area are healing and the positive side is none of it hurt unless I touched it and the bumps have only lasted a few days. Only symptom that sucks is the dysuria. They’ve all gone down pretty significantly, which I’m pretty happy about.