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haha story of my life :)

Even though it's only been a week I find myself coming on to check the forum just as naturally as I check twitter and Instagram (which is OFTEN and usually without even thinking about it). It's become a kind of lifeline. I do feel a little peace @aerial2013, so thank you. But still struggling with the fear that I'll never feel completely at peace. Right now I'd settle for the crushing weight on my chest to be gone and the feeling of wanting to burst into tears every 5 seconds. I'm officially a 25 year old crybaby

yea I think that's pretty much my only option @aerial2013. Thanks for responding so quickly. And thank GOD for this forum and ALL of you otherwise I'd be completely in the dark. My doctor gave me literally zero advice about how to proceed :-/

It's been 2 weeks and my outbreak hasn't healed :( I want to shave but I know better than to try yet. scared that it'll make me break out again too. if my first (and current) outbreak was on the mild side do you think shaving could spread it/make it worse? It sucks there's not much conclusive answers in dealing with this stuff

Hi everyone. I know there's been a lot of discussion about these iffy HSV tests. I can't believe how hard it is to get a definitive answer/diagnosis. The guy I thought gave me this (through oral sex) tested negative for hsv through blood tests. Last night I went to dinner with him and he called the hospital to make sure they tested for hsv. Turns out they did---negative. Are these tests often wrong?? Not really relevant, but he's also never had any symptoms, never a cold sore in his entire life. Because of all of the above, is it unlikely I got it from him?

@defeatedbuttrying your post just made me cry because I literally feel your hurt and pain. I feel the same way. Why did this happen to us? We're not bad people. It's not fair. I don't even know who I got it from, or what type mine is yet. I find myself bargaining with god... just take this all away and give it back to me when I'm already married with kids. How unhealthy is that? Trying to stay positive and be strong is so hard. You're not alone. xo

@defeatedbuttrying I'm so sorry for what you've been going through for the past couple of weeks :( But your strength gives me some hope. and ps what a DICK that guy is. You deserve better.

I haven't heard of any false neg swabs @aerial2013, but I guess it's possible? @adrial might know

update: I went in and and this new doctor says it doesn't look like herpes to her either. I got a blood test; results won't be back until next week because of the holiday. I feel like all these doctors do is get my hopes up and in the end I'm going to crash harder than when I first suspected I had it. :(

@aerial2013 I feel the exact same way. I'm going in at 2pm today but I almost feel like it's pointless. I'm 99% sure I have herpes although the first 2 times I went to my gyno she said she didn't think I had it ( the first time I was in for a yeast infection and the bumps had just appeared and she didn't mention them at all. the second time I went in specifically because of the bumps/scabs and she said it didn't look like herpes to her and not to worry). I'm going to a different dr today to see what she says, although the scabs are now almost gone. I don't know what else to do.. I can't keep laying around crying. Regardless of what she thinks today I'm going to ask for antivirals. I can't go through another awful 2week+ outbreak. I'm also going to ask for a blood test.

@iamentj you are SO strong and positive. wish I could find some of the strength you possess. thanks for sharing

I've now had sores for a little over 2 weeks.. at this point they are white/red and scabby (sorry to be so graphic). I'm wondering if something I'm doing could be prolonging the process? since I've read that caffeine and alcohol might have an affect I've avoided both. I'm so sad about this because I love coffee and like to have a few glasses of wine on the weekends to unwind. I know everyone's different but is anyone able to indulge in these things without breaking out?

thanks so much @defeatedbuttrying. it helps to know that this feeling won't last forever. it's so hard to be positive right now but you and others on this site are such a blessing. I'm just so mad at myself because all I can handle doing is laying in bed alone.. when I try to do more I fall apart. I just want to feel better and get back to my regular life (again, it's not so much the physical symptoms as the psychological ones.. and I know I should be grateful for that). Anyways, thanks for your posts, I connected to your story so much.

@defeatedbuttrying I am so right there with you. this is so hard. for me it's only been a few days.. I'm in that can't eat/can't sleep stage where I have no idea how I'm going to handle it. they say stress triggers outbreaks.. which is ironic because now that I know what I have I can't imagine a time when I won't be stressed. sending positive thoughts your way while still trying to find my own. xo

thanks @wcsdancer2010 you are an angel. <3

@adrial @wcsdancer2010

thank you so much for the positive responses. I am going to get a blood test this week, although I'm 99% positive it is in fact herpes :( if my test comes back negative and I have to wait a few months before I get retested, do I have to abstain from sex completely until I find out? I've had the sores for almost 2 weeks now, and they've gotten very red with a darker scab in the middle. I've noticed that a couple times the scab has fallen off the in the shower leaving the sores open again. How can I stop this from happening? and I've had no swollen lymph nodes or anything of that nature. I'm wondering if this maybe is not my first outbreak and I just didn't notice before. I also feel occasional tingling around my groin and buttox. one more question. does anyone know of any cases where people have only had one outbreak, without taking any antiviral meds? I'm trying to stay hopeful appreciative of any and all feedback. xo

hi everyone.. 25 year old female from CT. very very new to all of this. looking for someone (doesn't matter age/gender) who has a little more experience with the virus to talk help me through some of this. I can also do my best to lend support. thanks xo

2 weeks ago I went to my gyno for pain/itching/burning.. I was diagnosed with bacterial vaginosis (similar to a yeast infection). At the time I also had 2 small bumps on the outside of my vagina, which I didn't think much of and my gyno didn't mention them so I left with my prescription for the infection. 2 days later the bumps had gotten worse; itchy and burning. I looked online and convinced myself (from looking at pictures and reading about symptoms) that I had herpes. I went in to see my gyno again right away and she checked me and said it did not look like herpes to her and that her gut feeling was that it wasn't. She also said she couldn't test/culture anything since the bumps were hard/crusted over. I was put at ease for the rest of that day, but I woke up the next morning with a pit in my stomach and looked at the sores again, I realized that I KNOW my body, and something isn't right. After a few agonizing days I've come to terms with the fact that I have hsv2. I have not officially been diagnosed but I plan on going this week to talk to a different doctor and hopefully get a blood test. I am not coping well with this. I have the worst pit in my stomach. I can't eat or sleep. Can't stop crying. I'm a 25 year old female. I've told my mom who's very supportive and has a "it's not the end of the world" attitude. But for me it feels like it is. I've been casually seeing someone for a few months and I'm so so scared to tell him. I don't think I got it from him. I drunkenly hooked up with an ex right before my outbreak (I received oral sex from him). I called him and he got tested and said all blood tests came back negative, but I don't see how that could be true. I feel defeated and depressed and just awful. I live in an area where everyone knows everyone and their business (especially with social media). I'm terrified someone will find out. I don't know what to do. I have so many questions but from reading some of these posts I know now that everyone's experience is different. I guess I just feel completely hopeless :(