katie

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Thank you for your wise advice. You have shown me such support in my wacky expedition. I will not post again until I have any results. Thank you.

I agree it could be anything, but isn't it strange all these things started happening after I briefly kissed someone and the next day they got a cold sore.

I need closure. I know this is crazy but i hope I get a positive diagnosis. I need to move on for crying out loud. How can I heal if I can't get a diagnosis? And really looking forward to a positive diagnosis is quite sad...the only happy thing about it is I will get to see Herry perform!!!!

I am in Canada....all our STD centres do not do blood testing...Stupid I know! Hardly any doctors here support herpes blood testing. I have searched and managed to beg one to give me a blood test. I have finally decided that I am going to go to a hospital emergency department tomorrow at a hospital that specializes in these type of viruses. I know this is what I have, for some reason, it has spread all over my skin someitmes showing up as one or two pimples, sometimes more. The nerve surges are typical of herpes prodome. Vaginal and anal burning/itching/pain and tingling down legs. Same with the face, tingling mostly, not as much pain. So I don't want to post a worst case scenario here, but I fear that's what it is. Everytime I feel nerve pain or itching a pimple appears somewhere. I am worth it! I deserve to be treated seriously and have my symptoms be heard and respected. I am not some crazy emotional female! Doctors have become too complacent and I just let them walk all over me. I am taking control. I am a mom of 3. I am a beautiful intelligent person and I know what's happening to my body so some doctor out there is eventually going to respect me enough to believe me and journey with me to figure out what this is besides telling me I am nuts! I would really appreciate some good vibes headed my way in next little while. Feeling really empowered but at the same time really frail.

Thanks Dancer!

Ok great thanks for your prompt response. Now I have to find a doctor to do it. I can't tell you how many refused a herpes blood test before I finally got one to agree at 10 weeks which was negative.

Hi. Just to clarify....does anyone know out there, how long I would have to wait to test for HSV from a blood test after being on antivirals? When should I get tested? THanks

OMG hysterical...just noticed I have been spelling herpes wrong! LOL!

Thanks for your post. It made me cry. I have never been very accepting of myself.....no reason really....I am very successful...I am a professional, academic, I would say fairly attractive, in good shape, good mom, fun, love to learn and experience new things, but there has always been an empty space....tried to fill it with "connecting sex".....backfired......now I am left with the same empty space and herpies. Maybe herpies will be my journey to figuring out what this empty space is and eventually filling it to be a whole new complete me.

Also, my biggest fear is the total loss of intimacy with another person.....really hard to feel vulnerable to that again with or without H.

Thanks Herry! I was so hoping you would write back. Came across nucking futs is right. There's a long story behind my HSV contraction or non contraction as there probably is for everyone....filled with lots of turmoil and emotion and bad luck (LOL). Really struggling sometimes to contain it and it came out on my last post. Apologies! I really appreciate your perspective and have read lots of your posts and you are very eloquent, not surprised at all you are writing a book...definitely would be a great read.

Well, I read over my previous post and I sound like a total lunatic! So here is my attempt to be a rational human being struggling with something difficult that has happened in her life.....something that she never thought would happen to her! I believe I have contracted oral hsv1 and genital hsv1 at one time. I have been experiencing symptoms with various degrees of intensity and duration for 5 months....going on 6. I cannot obtain a positive diagnosis yet and have been on antivirals for 2 months with not much change. I have recently got off them and now on antidepressants. Waiting to take another blood test at which time I will post and ask that Herry the Herp better get his tutu ready! I, like a lot of you, hate that sex, such a normal expression of intimacy and love/lust can have such an emotional and physical consequence. I am in my mid 40's, just got my mojo back after having children and then this hits me. Seems like some sort of sick joke. I was really enjoying sex, finding out I am really good at it (lol) and it hit me like a truck! Having sex at this age, so much more mature and appreciative of sex and all it has to offer....compared to when you are younger is really quite amazing.. I went from ecstatic and enjoying all that sex had to offer to feeling like I will never have sex again (all in 6 months)....tough being on such a severe switch in emotion.I just can't imagine how to get over the anxiety of 1)knowing that sex can be good after herpes and 2) of transmission. I know all the facts and statistics...how do you get out of your head and enjoy again! Since my symptoms have been continuous it feels like I am always contagious....its never safe to have sex! And if I have genital and oral HSV1 technically it shouldn't be reeking such havoc on my body. It's supposed to be the "more tolerable herpes"....NOT! I want to get passed this but my physical symptoms won't let me forget. I have been reading posts and people have wrote that they have done so much personal exploration on the herpes journey...I was hoping I could get some ideas from you out there on how you came to terms....what was your trigger to let it go.....I have so many supportive people around me that are trying to help but I don't think anyone can understand unless they have it themselves.

Just wondering if you ever got them swabbed. I get those red pimples/bumps too on my hands/arms/legs.

Didn't go to hospital...slept all day instead. I am going to ask to see a nerve specialist. Love to all.

Well, I think I have finally had enough! Had another episode while sleeping with nerve pain in my head/neck/back. I think I will head to the hospital today and see what they say. I have been off Valtrex for a week and noticed the burning started to come back in genitals. Whether this is herpes or not, I am not imagining it and I am not manifesting it.

Anyway, not going to post anything about symptoms anymore....just results and asking for support. I don't want to be part of fear mongering (SP?). I just need to know if there's someone out there with the same things going on. THanks to chrymar for your similar story. Hope we find answers soon and those answers are herpes negative and a diagnosis of something else.

THanks for posting on mine....thought I would read yours. My symptoms are very similar to yours but my pimples are not painful at all, I get pain in the area its going to come then it itches like crazy and pop, there comes the pimple soon after. None on my outer labia (I could have some in the cervix....don't know). I do have anal and vaginal burning. But its not constant...it comes and goes. The intensity of it has decreased significantly from when I first felt I had my primary outbreak. Anyway, I feel for you and I too pray for blisters so I can just get damn diagnosed already!!! But then I hear the stories of how painful they are for people and I rethink. Will be sure to follow your story. BIg hug

OMG really?! I am going into my 6th month and I just feel so defeated. I know this sounds crazy, but it has spread all over my body. I feel that creeping, numb, pain feeling and it circulates to different body parts, then itching, then comes pimples....never blisters. I am so scared that it is going to go into my spine. I so thank you for your post....why do some people get symptoms and they go away and others get it non stop?

And whether I have herpes or not...I believe I have it....LOL....and I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank those that have responded to my posts and the people that contribute to making this website a valuable resource for those of us going through what I would call a very traumatic time. Thank you for the support!

OMG....you are sooo funny! I would luv to see that. But I definitely hope I am wrong. And I don't deny I am a hypochondriac and have anxiety about illnesses......I have done a full panel STD twice.....negative.....I will let you know my blood results when I test in a couple of months. I really hope you mean what you said about the video cam!!! Soo funny...when I was like 4, I sang I'm a little teapot at my first singing recital....LOL...how'd you know? I am on antidepressants and seeking councilling. So I'm covered...no worries....Wondering how long you would need to be off antivirals to have an accurate blood result?

Yes, I am on antidepressants....been 3 weeks....no change in physical symptoms....but it as helped my depression a bit.....will wait a bit more. I know this is HSV1....and its manifesting really weird in me....don't know why....maybe b/c I got oral and genital at the same time. Either way, stuck til I can get a positive blood test or sthng to swab. In limbo for a few more months I am afraid. Thank you for your advice....feeling defeated.

Thank you....I read the thread.....I did get a blood test at 10 weeks post exposure and it was negative. Since I have been on antivirals for 2 months with it doing absolutely nothing.....I will retest in a few months. I still really feel this is herpes, but I am open to drs testing for other things. The only suggestion they have is stress which I realize I have but people who are stressed can also have herpes or other diseases. I asked to see a nerve specialist but dr won't do so unless I have been on antidepressants for 3 months! That's ridiculous! I am running out of drs to see. I was able to get referral to dermatologist for them to look at pictures of the pimples and stuff going on with fingers, legs, buttocks, face, chest, arms....sometimes just one pimple and never in clusters and never with fluid. But they pop up intermittently some stay for 2 days some appear and disappear within the hour and some stay for 3 weeks. Its so strange! I am tired I would say is an understatement and feel defeated and wish I had a money bet going with someone so at least I could get rich from this whole experience LOL. Anyway, I have very supportive people around me. I am still at a loss for ending my relationship (reasons unbeknownst to my partner).....I came up with some excuse as he is in a serious relationship and we were casual....I couldn't imagine infecting 2 people with this thing in one swoop.....even though I have done above and beyond what a normal person could do to determine if I had some sort of STD. I felt guilty, not really about passing to him....I did all I could to determine what I had/have...but if he got it and gave it to his partner would devastate me. Anyway, unsure where to turn...you gave some good ideas...many thanks. I fear that no dr will take me serious now and I am left to deal with all these symptoms with no meds to help and no sex either until I figure this out which is really hard.....(just hit my sexual peak 6 months ago) REAL DOWNER!

I have been tested for all other STDs twice...negative..... Thanks for responding.

Hi. I had a swollen lip with 3 tiny pimples (mosquito bites) on the inner bottom lip. Damn dr didn't swab but gave me valtrex and antihistamine and said take both....symptoms subsided within 24 hours of taking meds. Still had numbness in tip of nose, tip of tongue, roof of mouth.....went away mostly....had oral sex 4 days later b/c symptoms had stopped then next day extremely tired swollen lymph nodes....felt like had mono!!!! I have such weird skin and abnormal reactions to things I didn't think much of it (the lip part). But then 14 days after the oral sex incident, had sex with my partner and experienced dysuria.....2 days later swollen vagina.....urine infection.....pain like vulvodynia continued for 3 weeks....but no sores! Had 2 drs appts to check and they all said 100% you don't have it....no sores! I have been experiencing for 5 months, pain and burning in vaginal and anal area and down legs which comes and goes. I never have a day without symptoms. However, the good thing is hte symptoms are a lot less now adn before they were at an excruciating 10....now they hover at 2 to 4. Much more tolerable. Anyway, I have been surfing net for 5 months and I know the risks of passing intellectually but emotionally I can't seem to get passed them. And say I am one of the 2% that passes.....how horrible would I feel to see someone in the pain that I experienced? Herpes is a frustrating virus to say the least. It is an emotional virus. I keep thinking that they will find a cure...it sounds so promising.....I can wait to have sex.....10 years! LOL!