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Successful Disclosure?

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Hello All!

I started seeing someone recently and we’ve been on a few dates. I let him know on the second date that I had herpes- I’ve never disclosed before (diagnosed in the middle of my last relationship 07/19) and this was obviously a difficult moment, I am proud of myself for getting through it. 

The next time we met he said he needed to do some more research regarding it bc he’s on some immuno-suppressant medicine - and will be for the rest of his life. I’m glad I wasn’t immediately rejected (a big fear I have) but now we’re in a weird limbo where the impetus is on him to research because it’s related to his medication issue - that I don’t know very much about. 

Does anyone have specific resources on this?

He engages in other activities that suppress the immune system like drinking hard liquor so I’m not sure what his limits are. 

For context I have HSV-1 and get outbreaks fairly frequently- which I’m working on (bolstering my immune system + avoiding things that suppress it [alcohol, sugar, etc] I take a huge supplement stack daily including: lysine, vitamin c, vitamin d, zinc and acyclovir (500mg / 5x day when I have an outbreak) but am thinking of moving to more intense medication- at a higher dosage- does this help?

I have a lot of food sensitivities and when I’m avoiding those foods it’s much easier for me to limit out breaks. If you’re someone who gets a lot of outbreaks I HIGHLY recommend food sensitivity testing. It’s made a huge different in my life but it’s difficult to avoid certain foods all the time (dairy, wheat, soy, etc). 

I’m also a cyclist commuter and this has obviously caused some discomfort. Does anyone have suggestions along those lines - thinking about getting a moon seat (https://www.moonsaddle.com) has anyone tried this?


I’m so grateful for this community and resources. While we face certain shared challenges I’m glad that we’re not alone. 🌸


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Hello, @Helpwithherpes

I am so sorry about this, and I am so sorry I did not respond to your first inquiry on the 11th. 

I am very sorry that the person broke up with you, however you deserve so much better anyway. I honestly think I am currently going through the same thing with someone (I think he is ghosting me, yippee), and have been rejected for having herpes SO many times. I also have HSV-1, and I thankfully have not had too many outbreaks (only two since my first in March of 2019). Things that have helped me are being aware of my prodrome symptoms so I can make sure I'm prepared for an outbreak before it happens. Lysine cream really helps, too, and is natural. 

I also am a cyclist and my herpes hasn't stopped me! 

I think there is a way to delete posts, but I do not think the user can. Contact Adrial, the founder and owner of the site. You can tag him @mr_hopp and ask!

I am sending you blessings and wellness!  Stay strong! 🌄♥️

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I have HSV2 and take 1 Valacyclovir everyday 500MG.. It prevents the spread and I haven't had an outbreak in a couple years. because of it. You could consider this instead of all the other things you're doing. It might not work the same for everyone, but it's been fantastic for me.

Sorry he ended it. What did you know about the medication he's taking and his condition? He has an immuno issue but is engaging in behaviour like drinking that affects it negatively? Do I have that right? Do you want to be with a person like that?

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