Terrible initial herpes outbreak :(

[MsJinx]

I'm not sure where to begin, but I did get my test results back today from a swab of my blisters-HSV II. I had been having itching and pain in my vaginal area for about 8 days and I went to the GYN last Thursday because I thought I had an STD or yeast infection. I didn't get an outbreak of blisters until Friday and went to my primary doctor on Saturday where I was swabbed and started on Valtrex. I pretty much knew I had genital herpes at this point. I am having a really bad outbreak (20+ blisters) and while the pain has decreased since being on Valtrex, the blisters are not healing. I am obviously very horrified and disappointed in myself for having this and feel like what little of a dating life I have will now be zero.

 

I am trying to figure out who gave me this. I knew I was positive for HSV I when I was tested about 2.5 years ago, but have never had a cold sore anywhere (had a blood test for herpes). My fiance at the time was blood test positive for HSV II but had never had a genital outbreak and I have never had a cold sore. We had unprotected sex (we have a child together). We have been broken up/no sex with him for a little over 2 years. Since then, I have had very few sexual partners. Most recently, I had sex twice in early Dec with a new partner-we only used a condom once. My vaginal area was sore/itchy after that, but there were no sores/blisters. I went on a weekend trip in mid Jan and hooked up with a guy I met-we kissed and had oral sex but no intercourse. I'm pretty sure it was one of these two guys who I got the herpes from. I'm not trying to blame anyone (I can only blame myself), but I would like to tell them thanks for infecting me and let them know they have this virus so they can inform future partners. I realize they may not know they have the virus and/or have never had symptoms. I also realize that I may have had the HSV II virus and have never had an outbreak until now, but the timing seems off. I also realize I need to get an HIV test.

 

This website is a wealth of knowledge and support and I am glad my web search led me here. I am still dealing with the shock of having this disease-I feel like my sex life is over-I can't imagine anyone negative wanting to be with me :( Anyways, thanks for letting me vent.

[HerryTheHerp]

Hey Jinx,

 

If you are experiencing a primary outbreak, and it does sound like you are, it's one of the guys you met in December. You should let them both know and tell them they need to get tested.

 

As far as the primary goes, well, it usually sucks. I had about half a dozen blisters, and they took several weeks to heal. Your's sounds pretty bad so you'll want to get on some Valtrex or Alyclovir to help, and you might also want to try slathering some aloe or zinc cream on them to help them heal faster and itch less.

 

The good news is that for the vast, vast majority of people the primary is always the worst and subsequent OB's (if they occur) get progressively milder and far less annoying.

 

Waiting for the HIV test can be very stressful, I know, I just got mine taken care of. In the interim, if you can, ask your partners to get tested and that will help you alleviate much of that stress.

 

As far as herpes goes, you're love life isn't over, it's just been changed a little bit. It will get better, it will go on, you're not alone. For now, browse the site, ask the questions, and know that there's an amazing team of people right here who've got your back and are happy to help.

[WCSDancer2010]

MsJinx

 

First - Welcome. Glad you found us and we are here to support you :)

 

I would start with the last guy you met and work backwards.... get yourself informed here first (the disclosure handout is a great resource http://bit.ly/h-opp-disclosure-handout ) so you can let them know WHY you need to have them tested (ie, that they likely have never been tested and they could be carrying it unknowingly). One of the most empowering things you can do right now is to use this as a way to educate those guys so that they don't pass it on (if they have it) to any more people.

 

As for your love life, well, we have TONS of success stories of H+ folks having H- partners. I'll post a couple down here but just troll around the forums and you will find plenty more :) ... Herpes is just one more "deal breaker" for some .... if you can look at it that way, it's just another conversation to have (along with, do you have kids?, do you smoke?, etc) about things that we tend to discuss when we are trying to see if someone is a good "fit" for us.

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/2384/successful-herpes-disclosure#Item_2 Bookworm_21

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/2386/ive-been-gone-for-too-long

klopz

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/2390/update-on-my-for-my-h-opp-peeps#Item_2 nic4897

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/2445/my-success-story simplyme24

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/2495/a-coming-out-story- DanieM

 

(((HUGS))) I know you may not believe it right now but you WILL be fine...promise :)