I feel extremely guilty and upset

[kac002]

I met this amazing guy. And I keep thinking how if I meet amazing/nice guys they will be the type who are accepting of me even with Herpes... but then I think about this guy and I get really upset... because he is so nice/genuine/honest/caring/sweet/etc that he doesn't deserve to deal with this,.. hes so amazing I can't imagine putting him through this and I feel he deserves better... how will I ever find someone feeling this way... I just cant imagine subjecting him to this - not his fault so why should it be his problem

[WCSDancer2010]

So why do you believe that now that you have Herpes you are not deserving of meeting an amazing/nice guy? You say he deserves better...Don't YOU deserve better too?

 

And really, what right do you have to determine for him if he is willing to take a small risk of getting H from you if he likes you back? He's an adult, let him make up his mind if a <5% risk (if you use any kind of precautions) is worth it to him.

 

We take risks EVERY DAY...many of which could KILL us (just getting in a car puts you in a 1% risk over your lifetime of being killed...never mind just injured.) And MEN have a habit of doing plenty of things that could get them seriously killed (Just watch America's Funniest Home Videos for proof! :p ) . So if you look at it that way, this is just another risk in our lives that he might say is worth it.

 

not his fault so why should it be his problem

 

Honey, we ALL come with some kind of baggage...physical OR emotional. Personally I would be more worried about your lack of self love and self confidence than Herpes ... because you need to believe in YOU in order to be your best self with ANY partner.

 

And hell, how do you know he doesn't already have it???

 

Give him a chance... (assuming the feelings are reciprocated).

 

(((HUGS)))