Annnnd a brick wall...

[Sparklepony]

So I've been feeling a lot better the last week. Had the awkward "you gave me herpes" talk with the guy who passed this along to me. Decided to take this all as a sign that I need to start taking better care of myself. Generally accepted it and realized that this isn't the end of the world in the grand scheme of things....

 

.... then I had a dream it was AIDS.

 

I had an anxiety attack. The first one in years. I felt sick to my stomach. Looked up the symptoms (I know, I know... don't use Google) and I can't stop thinking about it. Obviously my diagnosis was the herpes, the test came back positive for that. I just keep panicking thinking that I could have something more as well. I have a doctors appointment on Monday and plan to ask for the full panel test just to put my mind at ease. Logically I don't think I have anything more than herpes but my mind is still racing and my body is still in panic mode. Is it normal to freak out like this? Can someone just come slap some sense into me please.

[HerryTheHerp]

Alright, deep breath. First, know that many of us on this forum (almost all of us) went through the same thing. Why? Well, because the symptoms for both are very similar, as is the incubation period.

 

Now, take a deep breath. Don't know where you are, but the likelihood is you have a low HIV seroprevalence in the area. Also, HIV is far harder to transmit than herps. Even unprotected, you're looking at a low rate of transmission for most sex acts.

 

Take a breath. Relax. Do your homework. If you're still in touch with your mambo partner, ask him to get tested. If he tests negative, you're all but in the clear.

[Sparklepony]

1- I appreciate you not telling me I'm losing my mind, 2- I appreciate your reassurance.

 

Logically I know that I'm just going through the motions of adjusting to this "life change", but then I continue to freak out.

[HerryTheHerp]

Oh, sure. We've all been there. Trust me, longest 3 months of my life.

 

Just breathe in, breathe out.

[Kanoa]

@Sparklepony, as herry said, we've probably all been there... and yes, it sucks!!! I went through a major freak out a year ago after being diagnosed with herpes because almost directly after that diagnosis, I got mono, and the symptoms of mono are identical to the early HIV symptoms, and it took them a bit to get me the correct mono diagnosis so... I know what you're feeling. It's definitely smart to do a full panel testing, and it may help put your mind at ease to do an early HIV test -- that's what I did. Normally if you have HIV it takes a few months after getting it for it to show up in test results, but you can do an HIV RNA test that "detects" it earlier than that. If you go to http://www.stdalert.com/index.php you can find a testing center in your area that does this sort of test. Try to love your body right now and remember that no matter what "conditions" we may have, they don't effect our value/worth as a person, and they don't define us ... they only have as much power as we give them.