So it happened. I think I've given this to my partner

[Feelingblue]

Haven't been on here for a while. Everything was going so well with the boyfriend. Until now. I take suppressive therapy haven't had any problems whilst taking it. I had a small cut which I knew was from my boyfriends finger nail a felt it happen, so did he and he apologised. Anyway, the day after it was a little sore but a checked it and knew what it was and how it had happened and I'm taking suppressive therapy and had no problems. Fine I thought. So I had sex with my partner and then bam like an hour later I felt it was a bit sore I checked and an ulcer had formed. I can't deal with guilt and I haven't even told him yet I'm embarrassed because he thinks I don't get outbreaks. I didn't haven't for ages on the meds. This is the most pain. How can I put him through this and he'll dump me if he gets symptoms. Will I go to jail? Help

[Feelingblue]

Please someone help. I don't know what to do. This is the worst pain ever had

[Elise1977]

He knows you have hsv, right? Then he has accepted the risks that you could pass it to him with or without a sore. Even if you had a sore forming, it doesn't mean it transmitted, and even if it did, the chances are he'll be one of the people with no/minimal symptoms. You will not go to jail.

 

I would talk to him and let him know. I know it sucks, but if he alrady knew you had it then he had to know this was a possibility.

[Feelingblue]

Thank you. That's the thing though. I know he cut me and he already gets mouth cold sores, so I don't want to make him worry if it is something other than an outbreak, he might not have caught it and if he has he probably wouldn't notice. I don't want him to hurt or worry if he doesn't need to. I had asked him to wear a condom but he decided to take it off. He does know but he thinks I don't have outbreaks which until now I wasn't. I've read all these stories about court cases and fines and jail it scares me. The disease itself isn't really a big deal. But the thought of the guilt and reprocusions is :(

[Katidid]

First off....take a step back and look at this. He does know you have H. Is it Hsv2 or 1? You asked him to wear a condom and he took it off. It's not your fault!!! Even if you don't have ob's, you can still pass it on so that has no bearing at all. Also, he is a slight bit more immune with having oral herpes anyway. Just wait a few weeks and see what happens. You may not have passed it on at all. It was a cut not an ob. Yes, the virus can work it's way through a cut, but you don't know that it did. You might just need to chill for a bit and see what happens.

[Katidid]

Also, less risk woman to man

[Feelingblue]

Hi, thank you katidid! I have type 2. I'm pretty sure it is an ob, but it started as a cut. I guess because the skin got damaged I had an ob, but whether it turned before or after sex I don't know. I think I will wait, he's a bit older than me and has had lots of partners maybe he already has it and doesn't know or maybe I never passed it. Or maybe he ll not get symptoms anyway. I don't want to worry him. I will sit tight. He seems a bit oblivious to the risks but I have told him time and time again. I know I've done my part if he chooses to forget about it and not take it seriously I don't know what else I can do. Plus you're right if I have passed it on, it could have been without an ob anyway.