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Questions: Herpes tests, dormancy & cheating?

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Ok...so....really new to this. About 2 months ago, my wife had said that she went to a doctor because she had a dry and uncomfortable feeling in her vagina the day or days AFTER we would have sex. Now, she tells me that the doctor said could be A UTI, but she believes it could also be H. I immediately started worrying (we are going through a really rough period) that she may have been with someone else and contracted it. She then said that she went to another doctor and the soctor said "the other doctor has no idea what she's talking about...blah, blah, blah." This could be a manipulation by my wife, but i havent seen any definitive proof that negates it. Important facts: I am 40+ and have been sexually active (not amazingly active, but maybe about 20 different partners since the start. My wife was a virgin when i met her, but lately, i've been finding signs of interest (may br slight paranoia, not totally sure). However, we were tested upon marraige, and about 2 years ago for Life insurance and no sihlgns of anything. I just had a cold sore appear today and i cant remember if ive ever had them, but definately not for many years, if So. Here's my questions:

1) Do, they check for H in those tests?

2) what is the likelyhood of it being dormant in my body without signs?

3) can i conclude or assume that my wife has cheated and that is where this was contracted?

i am so nervous, and anything can be worked out...but i need the truth!


Please reply ASAP....i need your help!


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I agree with JeffH on all three answers.


I now know that I must have been HSV2+ during at least a portion of my longest relationship (16 years) but neither of us were aware that one or both of us had it. I later found out through testing and then wondered in retrospect if certain symptoms I'd attributed to yeast infections might have been related to HSV2. My doctors tend to see anything other than ulcers as "not herpes" even though most people with herpes do not have ulcers. Also, if you are in the U.S., keep in mind about 1/4 of married women have HSV2 and an additional significant percentage have genital herpes as a result of GHSV1, so it is very common, even among married women. Only 10-20% of those infected are aware they are infected.


You might find relevant info in this detailed fact sheet from the CDC: https://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/stdfact-herpes-detailed.htm


A more comprehensive source of information is https://www.westoverheights.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Updated-Herpes-Book.pdf





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